Should I Accept this Invite Out?

[nicksaiz65]

As we speak I'm currently preparing for my next Databases test. But I have a question for you guys about my social circle and all that.

I don't want to have no friends next semester. The friends I have that aren't graduating are some fvcking snakes to say the least. We pretend to be cordial but we are NOT COOL. I would never ever chill with them. So I've got to build a social circle from the ground up essentially.

Part of my new social circle could be my band mates(I play in a band.) I mean we're working but we're going out and drinking too and stuff like that. So that could definitely work. But some of them are female: and I know a lot of people in the Manosphere don't really agree with female friends...

Dr. Nerdlove doesn't really agree with a lot of Manosphere Concepts, and he says that if you have female friends that can expand your social circle. And then give yourself access to even more new cool women to meet. He's doing more of a Positive PUA type thing.

However, people like AMS disagree. They say that all hanging out with a woman you're not fvcking will only lower your SMV because other women(and men) will see that you want to fvck her deep down but you can't. Yet you're willing to cut your nutz off, be her walking trophy/little b*tch, and be her platonic friend in the hopes that MAYBE you'll get some sex one day(you won't.) Women want who other women want and if you're friendzoned you're obviously ugly to her/she doesn't want your ass. If you were attractive to her and she liked your personality, she'd be throwing pvssy at you. He says there's really not much of a point in having female friends.

So I'm kinda caught in between that. Here's a specific dilemma for you guys that I'm in.

In the band I work in, a couple of the girls in there asked me if I wanted to go out and eat with them. I'm not gonna lie, going to get some Mexican Food today after I get out of class sounds bomb af. I get a cheat meal today and everything. They're my friends because we've been in the same organization for a while, and I know they have my back, but should I hang out with them? Getting Mexican does sound extremely tempting. But I'm not fvcking either one of them... in fact one's about to get married and the other is head over heels for this Alpha Male that ignores her and cheats with other women blatantly lol.

Especially considering what some of my other "friends" said about me and how they tried to use me, this does sound very tempting. Good Mexican Food before I go back to studying and some new friends????? Possibly at least...

I need your help guys. If you couldn't tell by now, I'm fvcking clueless. Should I accept this invite out or should I just say I have to study and I can't make it out?

A part of me is saying that I could just go to bars with them in the future and then use my nice Cold Approach Game. But the other half is thinking back to AMS and the Manosphere's words...

It's not enough... my life is still fvcking pathetic. I swear that I will change this and win!

Long story short what should I do? Do I accept the invite out? Or do I just stay in and say I have to study? I'm really tempted to go out because some Mexican really does sound delicious for my Cheat Meal.

 

[allancc3]

LMGTFY - Let Me Google That For You

For all those people who find it more convenient to bother you with their question rather than to Google it for themselves.

bfy.tw

 

[Serenity]

But some of them are female: and I know a lot of people in the Manosphere don't really agree with female friends...

The manosphere is an undefined group of men who share a set of social constructs. Just like feminists are an undefined group of women who share a set of social constructs.

Fully conforming to any group is a bad idea and will take away your individuality, the essence of you. You can be a sheep who follows a herd or you can find your own way. As you can see there's plenty of lazy people out there flocking to various groups because they don't bother using their brains, so they conform to a way of thought that already exists. Some do it to avoid the inevitable uncertainties that arises in life instead of experimenting.

You can trust a group or you can figure out for yourself what works and be 100x more confident about the solutions you done. I'd say fvck the manosphere, it's an insufficient crutch.

Do what you think is the best for your situation. If it's a success, then you know the answer. If not, then you learn and make better choices from that. You can't lose, it's only a matter of time before you get it right.

 

[GrowingPains]

When I think of this 'guys can't have girl friends' thing... this is what I think it means: Guys can't successfully and authentically be friends with women they want to have sex with. Because friend and fvckbuddy aren't synonymous, they're two different levels of intimacy and your desire for one will get in the way of the other. If you want to have sex but she isn't reciprocating that... then that's when you should start considering what the 'manosphere' says. But if you truly look at this woman as a friend, then be her friend.

I think saying you won't do anything is limiting. So as Dr. Nerdlove says, hanging out with women can create cool opportunities. Have rules and know when they apply.

You just need to know how to identify how you truly feel about this person and act accordingly. If you want to have sex and you're playing buddy buddy with her, concealing your intent until 'the time is right'.. then you're being the nice guy and you're setting yourself up for failure.

For example... a while back I posted about a close friend of mine that was coming up to see me. They're a woman. Now at the time I was trying to figure out how to advance things and leap outta the mf friendzone like Super Man on his way to save a cat from a tree. And after expressing my interest (I just casually asked if she thought we could be more), I've realized that the dynamic between us has changed in our recent interactions. I have noticed some jealously on my part, subconscious and I'm over that now that I realize it but it was there nonetheless. We were good friends when I couldn't have sex with her because I was in a relationship. And we were good friends before I asked her about being fwb. But now it's weird, because the idea of us having sex and my actions made it so. It's no longer buddy buddy, and our friendship has downgraded. So from my experience, I conclude that you can be friends with a woman... as long as you don't want to fvck. And even so, that may change over time as you start hanging around her all the time.

 

[nicksaiz65]

When I think of this 'guys can't have girl friends' thing... this is what I think it means: Guys can't successfully and authentically be friends with women they want to have sex with. Because friend and fvckbuddy aren't synonymous, they're two different levels of intimacy and your desire for one will get in the way of the other. If you want to have sex but she isn't reciprocating that... then that's when you should start considering what the 'manosphere' says. But if you truly look at this woman as a friend, then be her friend.

I think saying you won't do anything is limiting. So as Dr. Nerdlove says, hanging out with women can create cool opportunities. Have rules and know when they apply.

You just need to know how to identify how you truly feel about this person and act accordingly. If you want to have sex and you're playing buddy buddy with her, concealing your intent until 'the time is right'.. then you're being the nice guy and you're setting yourself up for failure.

For example... a while back I posted about a close friend of mine that was coming up to see me. They're a woman. Now at the time I was trying to figure out how to advance things and leap outta the mf friendzone like Super Man on his way to save a cat from a tree. And after expressing my interest (I just casually asked if she thought we could be more), I've realized that the dynamic between us has changed in our recent interactions. I have noticed some jealously on my part, subconscious and I'm over that now that I realize it but it was there nonetheless. We were good friends when I couldn't have sex with her because I was in a relationship. And we were good friends before I asked her about being fwb. But now it's weird, because the idea of us having sex and my actions made it so. It's no longer buddy buddy, and our friendship has downgraded. So from my experience, I conclude that you can be friends with a woman... as long as you don't want to fvck. And even so, that may change over time as you start hanging around her all the time.

I'll have to deeply consider this as I make new friends and reinvent my life

 

[GrowingPains]

https://www.sosuave.net/forum/threa...ween-dating-and-friendship.76027/#post-684908

 

[backseatjuan]

There is a difference between a woman you wan to fck and she won't give you and considers you a friend, and a woman you have no interest in who wants to be around you as a friend. So long as you don't fall for any of them romantically you should be fine. So I say yes, go ahead and go for mexican. But be ware, YOU ARE NOT PAYING FOR THEM, for yourself only, if they want to pay for you that's fine. What these women will do often, don't matter that you think they got your back, they would invite men with them, knowing that men would buy them food and drinks. This is your sht test, be sure to find out which one of them has a pool, maybe a 12 pack and pool party at her place, or maybe some drinks at a bar right after the mexican -- you all pitch in on beer, or at the bar every one buys their own drinks, tell them you short on money if anything.


P.S. you are not paying for them

 

[allancc3]

Friendzone = blue balls = "Imma make dese bitchez and hoes pay, fo' real. R.I.P. Elliot Rodger," infinity posts in nicksaiz's journal.

 

[Sunnypoo]

As we speak I'm currently preparing for my next Databases test. But I have a question for you guys about my social circle and all that.

I don't want to have no friends next semester. The friends I have that aren't graduating are some fvcking snakes to say the least. We pretend to be cordial but we are NOT COOL. I would never ever chill with them. So I've got to build a social circle from the ground up essentially.

Part of my new social circle could be my band mates(I play in a band.) I mean we're working but we're going out and drinking too and stuff like that. So that could definitely work. But some of them are female: and I know a lot of people in the Manosphere don't really agree with female friends...

Dr. Nerdlove doesn't really agree with a lot of Manosphere Concepts, and he says that if you have female friends that can expand your social circle. And then give yourself access to even more new cool women to meet. He's doing more of a Positive PUA type thing.

However, people like AMS disagree. They say that all hanging out with a woman you're not fvcking will only lower your SMV because other women(and men) will see that you want to fvck her deep down but you can't. Yet you're willing to cut your nutz off, be her walking trophy/little b*tch, and be her platonic friend in the hopes that MAYBE you'll get some sex one day(you won't.) Women want who other women want and if you're friendzoned you're obviously ugly to her/she doesn't want your ass. If you were attractive to her and she liked your personality, she'd be throwing pvssy at you. He says there's really not much of a point in having female friends.

So I'm kinda caught in between that. Here's a specific dilemma for you guys that I'm in.

In the band I work in, a couple of the girls in there asked me if I wanted to go out and eat with them. I'm not gonna lie, going to get some Mexican Food today after I get out of class sounds bomb af. I get a cheat meal today and everything. They're my friends because we've been in the same organization for a while, and I know they have my back, but should I hang out with them? Getting Mexican does sound extremely tempting. But I'm not fvcking either one of them... in fact one's about to get married and the other is head over heels for this Alpha Male that ignores her and cheats with other women blatantly lol.

Especially considering what some of my other "friends" said about me and how they tried to use me, this does sound very tempting. Good Mexican Food before I go back to studying and some new friends????? Possibly at least...

I need your help guys. If you couldn't tell by now, I'm fvcking clueless. Should I accept this invite out or should I just say I have to study and I can't make it out?

A part of me is saying that I could just go to bars with them in the future and then use my nice Cold Approach Game. But the other half is thinking back to AMS and the Manosphere's words...

It's not enough... my life is still fvcking pathetic. I swear that I will change this and win!

Long story short what should I do? Do I accept the invite out? Or do I just stay in and say I have to study? I'm really tempted to go out because some Mexican really does sound delicious for my Cheat Meal.

I'm not quite sure I understand WTF is wrong with having female friends if that is the ultimate intent on your part. Who gives a **** what a bunch of guys think about female friends, think for yourself. It's when in a relationship men and women can't be friends or if you feel attraction with a certain woman, otherwise who gives a ****.

 

[jaymbrs]

I have a handful of female friends (women who I have no desire to **** ever) who I have used from time to time to meet other women and successfully sleep with them. Nothing wrong with having them as long as neither of you wants to **** the other.