She's done. "Dishes are done, man"

[ThunderMaverick]

Yeah, this is enough right here:

This is over AIM with her:

Her: I want to know still what you mean about me being mysterious. It's been bugging me.

Me: Why would you care what I think?

Her: I dunno.

Me: Do you find yourself mysterious?

Her: No.

Me: Sometimes people can see qualities in others that others don't see in themselves. So, nya!

Her: Ok

Me: I want to get to know you better.

Her: I'm not that interesting.

Her: What is there to know?



*A bomb went off in my head when she said " I'm not that interesting". Would she say that to someone she liked? Hell no! I had to "PULL!" this one and shoot her out of the sky*


Me: "Her: I'M NOT THAT INTERESTING"

Me: You just answered your own question.

Me: Nevermind then. Anyways I'm off to bed. See you later! =)

*Me: signing off at so and so time*

She's not worth my time.


I feel like a dumb fuck for even wasting my time.

 

[PuertoRican_Lover]

Maybe she was being honest - no one ever thinks of themselves as being interesting - that is for others to judge! The disinterest in a guy shows when the girl doesn't ask the guy many questions about himself or she doesn't volunteer info about herself.

 

[Giovanni Casanova]

Originally posted by PuertoRican_Lover
Maybe she was being honest - no one ever thinks of themselves as being interesting - that is for others to judge! The disinterest in a guy shows when the girl doesn't ask the guy many questions about himself or she doesn't volunteer info about herself.

That's not the point, but the issue here is two-fold.

First, some people DO think of themselves as interesting. For example, I am interesting. If a person leads an exciting life, or has interesting hobbies, an interesting job, interesting friends, et cetera, then they tend to realize that they are interesting. In my experience, many people who say they're not that interesting are dead on.

Second, if you are interested in someone, you don't tell them that you're not interesting. The fact that she said that she wasn't that interesting was a neon sign that she wasn't interested in ThunderMaverick.

 

[California Love]

Hmm this one is strange. She's definitely not disinterested because of her first sentence. Maybe she really is a dull person.

 

[Giovanni Casanova]

Originally posted by California Love
She's definitely not disinterested because of her first sentence.

That's not an indication of interest. It's an indication of the time-honored female tradition of fishing for compliments.

 

[ScrewIt]

its possible that she was just being humble.

you know how it is with some ppl.

e.g.: wow i love your drawing, you're a really good artist.

dude: nah, no way!

 

[TooColdUlrick]

you're done with her because of...uh....what? am i missing something here? was there a previous thread on this?

Her: I want to know still what you mean about me being mysterious. It's been bugging me.


you've been on her mind. she's been thinking about you. this is a good thing, explore it. and it's plainly obvious that she asked you this because you previously indicated to her that you thought she was mysterious.


Me: Why would you care what I think?


you just killed the deal right there. why on earth would she or anyone else open up to you after hearing this? it's an obvious attempt on your part to try to get her to admit that she likes you, among other things.

the obvious comeback is "why has it been bugging you so much..." and probe her on it and deepen/reinforce this. further, she would care what you think if she likes you--right? you just gave her a good reason to NEXT YOU. did you consider this? that she NEXT'd you at this point?

hence,


Her: I dunno


.....yada yada yada...


Me: I want to get to know you better.


really? doesn't sound like it at all from your previous comment of, "why would you care what i think". these two statements are wholly inconsistent with each other. anyway, it's pretty AFC saying this. it wreaks of "i want to get to know your pvssy better". GOD, chicks hear this line over and over from guys.


Her: I'm not that interesting.


between the lines, "get lost" is the likely read. many people who are VERY interesting think they are not. again, you should have probed her on this--you could have recovered from the previous comments.


Her: What is there to know?


she's giving you another opening/chance for some good dialog. but your BOMB went off prematurely, based on faulty assumptions, with no good reason, and with a tad bit of hostility.


Me: "Her: I'M NOT THAT INTERESTING"

Me: You just answered your own question.


you just stomped on her for no reason. you threw it in her face. you told her that you think she's not interesting. you just killed the convo, and probably any chance with her, with your awesome logic.


*Me: signing off at so and so time*

She's not worth my time.


her, after you signed off...


Her: you are an azzhole

99% chance. i think you laid it on a little too thick with your comebacks. you definitely have some work to do with the convo skills--especially true with IM, where one can review what was previously said, unlike in-person convo.

again, am i missing something?

i apologize if i am, but dude, you killed this deal all by yourself, it seems to me. she gave you many openings for excellent dialog and you basically stomped on her.

 

[ThunderMaverick]

http://sosuave.com/vBulletin/showthread.php?s=&threadid=48770




Oy.


Ok..so everyone is telling me she's not interested. Now you're telling me she IS maybe slightly interested?

I'm a asshole, eh? For the sake of not being an asshole (and for those reasons only) how do you guys suggest I patch things up? Like I said, I want to leave this thing alone, but I don't want to be a jerk about it.


Plus the reason I signed off was because she was talking to 2 other people and she was taking like, 5 minutes to respond to me.

And she was responding in

"yes" "no" IMs. Hardly interesting.

But should I clean it up on IM next time and say "I'm lying, I do find you interesting, and here's why..."

Not to get at her, but to be nice.

Like I said before, I still have a week of hanging around with her, and she's helping us do a film.

I can't just ignore her. Any suggestions about my attitude? I mean I've engaged in small talk over the past few days. Nothing more. And she's not repelled by me. She's still friendly and makes nice and cute gestures whenever I see her.


Critique, you beeyoches! =D

 

[TooColdUlrick]

wait a minute Thunder...i thought the dishes were done--she was done--thats it---she's toast. now you want to back track...

i read your original post about this chick. now it makes sense. you have said numerous times that you are insecure.

you need to work on this first, and clean your own house. otherwise you will get nowhere.

advice: forget about her.

i guess you can recover if you want to. anyway, it's always a good thing to try to recover from a fvck up, if you wish to. this is difficult to do, but it should be in your arsenal. especially true if you have mutual friends.

i think you were way too hasty and demanding with her with your AIM chat session.

i would suggest that you give her some "valid" reason why u had to cut her off--like someone came over or something.

You: sorry i cut you off the other night, my toilet burst on me

Her: oh that sucks....

<small talk>

You: so anyway, what do you do for fun..."

Her: whatever

You: probe and inquire and get her to open up

just keep it light and funny, just like you would with your buds. try out some very minor sex talk with her. women tend to be more open about it through IM'ing.

don't apologize for, nor even mention, the previous convo if you can help it. you already know she's thinking about you, so get her to think more about you (without suggesting such).

since you will be seeing her in person, use AIM to reinforce things. work on the "massage" angle some more, i a light hearted way.

go into this with the mindset that you want to improve your conversational skills and use her to do this. nothing more because...

she's probably toast anyway from what i gather, but you can still learn something from it.

 

[ToP DoN]

you analize things too much

you need to relax buddy...