"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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she wants the movies

enrodrehern

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hey guys im talking to this one hotty and i suggested for a first date to go have a coffee and she said why not a movie better. i like the coffee idea better but she likes the idea of the movie i guess bc she cant go until after 9pm. i joked around with her about watching a horror movie and me holding her and she went with it really well. what do u guys think i should do? and any suggestions for the first date as in how i should act/behave?:confused:

thank you in advance.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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AAAgent

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be careful of movies. It's the easiest place for dj newbies to fail at.

movie's are hard for a first date beceause:

1.) no talking=no rapport
2.) very few options for kino. holdings hands most likely no. footsies=no, arms around shoulder no. horror movie might give you the highest percentage for kino and that still isn't that high.
3.) the movie ends and your date ended with almost nothing happening.

try to get dinner before a movie if a movie is a must or reschedule for an earlier time.

First date movies usually don't end up good and most of the time if its not a good date its a bad one.
 

Diaforetikos

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What are you gonna do, find out cool information about her during the movie. You can't generate attraction just sitting next to her. And besides movie dates are gay. If she isn't comfortable around, any move you make will make you look desperate. Now this isn't ALWAYS the case, but it's generally happens.

Get coffee or ice cream, then take a walk somewhere. Is she young? That might be the reason.
 

enrodrehern

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Thank you Agent and Dia...you guys are right and thats exactly what I thought. Haha dia...she is 26 maybe thats why
 

Chromeo

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I think the younger the girl, the more likely she is going on a date with you already because she is attracted. So it will not really matter what you do with her.

Thats a main problem I think a lot of guys have is trying to ask girls out before they are actually attracted to them, then there is so much pressure put upon themselves to create that attraction on the date, when they could have just done that before hand and then gotten a hastle/worry free date with ease.

Just go and have fun, if shes already attracted you should be able to at least get a kiss after the movie if not an invite inside.
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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enrodrehern

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See chromeo bc I know she is attracted to me, that's the reason I agreed to the movies and didn't see it as a major issue. Your right on dude. Thanks
 

5string

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AAAgent said:
be careful of movies. It's the easiest place for dj newbies to fail at.

movie's are hard for a first date beceause:

1.) no talking=no rapport
2.) very few options for kino. holdings hands most likely no. footsies=no, arms around shoulder no. horror movie might give you the highest percentage for kino and that still isn't that high.
3.) the movie ends and your date ended with almost nothing happening.

try to get dinner before a movie if a movie is a must or reschedule for an earlier time.

First date movies usually don't end up good and most of the time if its not a good date its a bad one.
AAAgent nailed it. Movies are not good for the first few dates. If you do go, make sure to get a bottomless popcorn cup :)
 
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