"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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She says she had a good time... does she mean it?

tsmith2334

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Recently I took a girl out on a quick dinner date, and despite a few mistakes on my part I believe it went well enough

I didn't contact her at all afterwards, I figured I'd wait for her. About four hours after the date was finished, she sent me a message saying "thank youuuu i had a good time!!!"

Is it too cynical to question her sincerity? Would a girl bother contacting you afterwards if she didn't enjoy herself and wasn't interested in seeing you again?

Let me know from your experiences...
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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Gangster Of Love

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Call her up and invite her to get together again, soon.

What was your vibe during, and after the date? Any talk of you guys doing stuff together? Any light kino? Was she trying to sell herself to you? Was she treating you like a platonic friend? What did you talk about?

Without all the info, it is hard to tell. Looks like your gut told you NO, but she texted you.

Basic $hit, you need to call her up right now.
 

blackbelt2k

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I think your overall game played through. Afterall, her interest level was high enough to text you. Yes, thats right, she initiated the chase after you..pat yourself on the back.. The ball is in your court. I wouldn't text back right away, but call the next day and set another date up.
 

Bible_Belt

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words mean nothing. Just don't think about anything she says too much. Pay attention to her actions. Ask her out again and at least kiss her this time.
 

tsmith2334

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For what it's worth it was an IM not a text... it was kind of late at night and I was sleeping, she left it while I had my away message on... hope that doesn't matter to you guys... I replied with "me too" and a smiley the following morning

Gangster Of Love said:
What was your vibe during, and after the date? Any talk of you guys doing stuff together? Any light kino? Was she trying to sell herself to you? Was she treating you like a platonic friend? What did you talk about?

Without all the info, it is hard to tell. Looks like your gut told you NO, but she texted you.

Basic $hit, you need to call her up right now.
Thanks for the advice. The vibe wasn't bad at all. It started out pretty good, I could tell she was into me, especially at first sight (eye contact, etc.). There was some talk of us doing stuff together and yes it did seem like she was trying to sell herself to me at certain times.

As for kino I didn't really know to apply it, so it was probably minimal. I'm going to work on that for next time. Actually, our feet were touching for a little while we were eating and neither of us pulled away, I don't know if that counts for anything.

As for the negatives, I wasn't treated like a platonic friend or anything, but I was nervous after the initial adrenaline wore off. I wasn't visibly shaking or anything, I just lacked some of those important DJ tactics. I didn't really take any risks, because I was a little rusty with women and didn't want to come off as trying to hard.

She did contact me afterwards, like I said, I just hope it was sincere and not some obligatory thing she does. I am going to give her a call in the near future and ask her out again, hopefully she'll say yes.
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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tsmith2334

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Wolf said:
How are we supposed to know?? What were your mistakes? Telling her you\'d give everything you had to be with her, or something small? Did she smile a lot, did she FAKE smile a lot? We have no idea, we can only advise you on how to find out for yourself, which the above posts do well...
nothing major... i looked down sometimes... i'm not sure how my posture was... i mentioned her cute friend when i probably should have just been focusing on her... i didn't always have something to say... i probably could have used more kino and tried being more C and F... these all could be little things she barely noticed...

I didn't really do much that would turn her off... I'm just not sure how much I did to really turn her on... if that makes sense to ya
 

Gangster Of Love

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Take her on a coffee date (read the coffee date thread), or to the park and begin to drop some kino on this one. Why didn't you kiss/touch her? Call her up and invite her to get together, soon!
 

Francisco d'Anconia

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Gangster Of Love said:
Take her on a coffee date (read the coffee date thread), or to the park and begin to drop some kino on this one. Why didn't you kiss/touch her? Call her up and invite her to get together, soon!
This is the key to whether or not she enjoyed herself; she agrees to see you again.
 

tsmith2334

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Francisco d'Anconia said:
This is the key to whether or not she enjoyed herself; she agrees to see you again.
Ya, I pretty much figured that as well. Thanks... I guess I'll find out soon enough.
 
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