"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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She lives an hour's drive away from me

S

Sean O

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I won't go into the details of how we met, but this chick lives in another city, an hour's drive away from where I live. Thankfully, I have until the end of Monday to get her number, so I can spend some more time building rapport and getting to know her to see if she's really worth my time at all, but the distance thing is still bothering me. Have any of you went for a girl who lives this kind of distance away from you? And did the distance make it too difficult for things to work?

Thanks in advance.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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Sean O

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Update: I have her number, and its more like 45 minutes away.
 
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Sean O

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At first I'd probably see her once a week; same kind of dating frequency I'd have with a girl who lives closer to me. My concern is more to do with if I want to take things farther, since if I did, I'd probably want to see her more often. The distance might make that more of a hassle.

Anyway, I've decided to give it a shot anyway. Nothing ventured, nothing gained, yeah? Besides, maybe I'll find that the distance isn't much of an issue after all.
 
I

itishe

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Dude my ***** lives 3,048 miles away. You can make it work, believe me.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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A

ascalon

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Dude,i think it is a big distance :) .I dont say it is bad to have distant relationship, but thunk again,how can you love someone you cant see?someone you cant touch or talk with when you fall upset?

In my opinion your girl must be next to you,so you can share with her your happiest moments :)


P.S. If the girl of course is super super super duper cool and she likes you , you can try :)
 
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