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She lives a plane ride away

Mbuckets82

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Alright,

i grew up with this girl and she moved away after high school. We started talking again like 2018 and I asked to go see her, she made an excuse and I didn’t go. Ive told her about the diff women I’ve met and dated, and we continue to speak a lot.

Im going to ask her to come here to visit, she’s in TN and I’m in MD. It’s been almost 18 months since the last time I asked to go there. if she makes an excuse is that it? really idk how you speak like we do and with the history but not want to see the other person.

i continue to meet and talk to women here but always wonder about her. Would you drop her?
 

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Soldier King

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If you have something then definitely ask. Bring her a gift when your plane gets there :).

And if you keep talking and she says no, ask her again, what about now :).
 

billtx49

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If you have something then definitely ask. Bring her a gift when your plane gets there :).

And if you keep talking and she says no, ask her again, what about now :).
Get your facts straight. He offered to visit first, she refused. He has yet to ask her to come to him.
We usually focus first on the facts of each situation before giving advice here…
 

Soldier King

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You're right I actually left out details and skipped a step! It made sense in my own head and didn't read his question carefully enough.

If you have something then definitely ask. Bring her a gift when your plane gets there :).
I just meant if you guys really have something then try for it, don't just let it go. You can fly to her or she flies to you it doesn't matter and that's just up to your instincts from knowing her. If you feel like she still has a connection back to Maryland then ask her to fly here, she might have something nostalgic here, if not I would actually try to fly to her again because she doesn't have to do any work. You can give her the gift either way :).

And if you keep talking and she says no, ask her again, what about now :).
Lol that's so funny you said that, can I fly to you next week?
Her: na.
Her: I'ts warm today
You: Whoa awesome can I come see the weather where you are, you free this Friday?
Her: I had cheetos today.
You: You need to try sweet and sour chips, they are so good, can I bring them over to you and 3 others you're really gonna like on a plane this Monday when you don't have work.

Till you win or get exhausted :p. Whichever comes first.
 
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oldmanofthesea

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What exactly is promoting such interest on your end that, despite your ability to get other local women, you want to go down a path of trying to date someone far away? Think about the reason(s) and be truly honest with yourself. When was the last time you dated a girl? Did you recently have a breakup? What is it about this girl that is so great? Were you romantically involved before she moved away? If not, there is a 0.5% chance anything romantic will happen. Women make up their mind very quickly about men and you either go in the sexual bucket or the platonic bucket and if it’s the latter, it is there you will remain.
 

Mbuckets82

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Truth, shes cool and I think we would vibe but I’m on a dry spell here. If I met some women here I’d def go towards them because they are here.
Also I’m a single dad. I will do an injustice to my kids bringIng around a stranger. I prob shouldn’t marry or get serious with someone to the point where I bring a woman around them because it’s not fair to them.
Im just gonna give it a shot. Why not.
 

typical

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Alright,

i grew up with this girl and she moved away after high school. We started talking again like 2018 and I asked to go see her, she made an excuse and I didn’t go. Ive told her about the diff women I’ve met and dated, and we continue to speak a lot.

Im going to ask her to come here to visit, she’s in TN and I’m in MD. It’s been almost 18 months since the last time I asked to go there. if she makes an excuse is that it? really idk how you speak like we do and with the history but not want to see the other person.

i continue to meet and talk to women here but always wonder about her. Would you drop her?
Why are you wasting time emailing/texting/calling and behaving like a female would ? Don't you have some passion or dream or overzealous dream to chase down that uses up all your spare time and forces you to cut through all the bull**** ?

Have you visited more than 20 countries ? visited more than 100 cities across the planet ? Done something that might have your name written into the history books or at least remembered by 5 generations of your own family ?

Broaden your horizon mate. More to life than sitting in front of a screen and "talking"

Remember Women "Talk" Men "DO"
 

Mbuckets82

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Have you ever had sex with her?

If not, this is a complete waste of time and money.
Haha. I haven’t seen her face to face in about 20 years. I’d see if I get shot down. Then take my ball and go home.
 
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oldmanofthesea

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Thanks for being truthful!

It’s mostly dry spell related. So let’s address that. I see you mention your kids.... possibly as an excuse/justification to yourself as to why you are in a dry spell? As in, “I am not able to date as much as I would like so I will say it’s better that way or impossible because of my kids.” A few of the guys on this forum who have extreme abundance and game have kids. So that can’t be used as a legitimate excuse. Glassguy and Amante are two that immediately come to mind. You don’t have to bring women around your kids in order to date. You can wait to do that until you find a girl things get serious with. Ask others here with kids how they manage it.

Rather than hitting up girls you e never had a sexual history with, who live further away, you would do much better to focus on addressing the reasons you are going through a dry spell locally. So why do you think that is? Are you talking to women you are attracted to? Are you working on your social circle? Do you have co-Ed activities you spend time on? If the answer to any of these is no, then you will probably not have good success with women, so you need to address that.
 

Amante Silvestre

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I haven’t seen her face to face in about 20 years
When I was on social media I had about 40+ women on there that I knew growing up with. While we did chat and maintain some kind of tentative contact, we never really made any attempt to reunite, and most of them only live a few towns away.

People will usually be courteous and interested in chatting to old childhood and teenage friends, if for nothing else than out of curiosity to see how they ended up. But it isn’t typical for people to want to rekindle and continue those old friendships in the flesh after so many years apart, especially one on one. Class reunion maybe. But that’s about it.

The only people who are typically willing to rekindle very old friendships are those who are unhappy with the present; people who think their past is far better than their current life is. And that’s typically why many people might chat but have no desire to really pick up old friendships again, never mind pursue such people for relationships.

This scarcity with women is being comforted by nostalgia, and you’re grasping for strings to reconcile the two.


Also I’m a single dad. I will do an injustice to my kids bringIng around a stranger. I prob shouldn’t marry or get serious with someone to the point where I bring a woman around them because it’s not fair to them.
In what way would this not be fair to them? Please explain.
 

Mbuckets82

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Because my complete focus would turn from them to also include keeping the lady happy and they’d have to learn her too.

there just isn’t a lot around here. I’m gonna have to expand to the big city and out the comfort of a ten min drive and I’m home opposed to 35 40 in the city.
 
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