"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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She Has A Boyfriend...???!

Alemayehu

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Hi, this is my first time posting, some of my friends Chase, Spike, and Ray got me on to this. I have read the "newbie" guide and I already to a lot of the stuff that the main Don Juan guy says. However, I still have this question about this girl..

I met "this one girl" at a UCR College Orientation. I talked to her as a joke, initially, because one of the guys that I had met thought she was hot. When I started talking to her (because I thought I had nothing to lose), I was actually genuinely interested in her, and not just because of looks! She was into the same stuff I was (Star Wars when I was younger, Biology Major, Gym, Beach, Lord of the Rings Collectibles, etc). So, after that time I met her at breakfast, I told her that I looked forward to seeing her later.

So, on and on it went, and I ate all the meals (breakfast, lunch, and dinner) with her for the remaining 3 days. I got a lot of teasing from my roommates who thought I just wanted a piece of @$$, but I didn't really. I wanted to know more about her. I think I screwed up though because at the dance, she didn't want to dance with me because she mentioned she had a boyfriend. HOWEVER, this issue was not brought to my attention when I was up in her room watching Something about Mary with her and another girl.

Anyways, this girl seems special, but I do not want to make any early judgement calls. Please hook me up with some advice, I am not a retard, so don't worry, she is near my age, not Adriana Lima, and is going to be a college freshman like me this coming Winter. FYI I am Ethiopian (AKA BLACK) and she is White, I'm working out so my weight won't be a factor, just curious if that will affect it, message me or whatever, cuz seriously, lol I think about her every damn day (CRUSHES ARE ANNOYING some times. Thanks ;)
 
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"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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I'm Joe Dirt

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Well I doubt race should be an issue, though it might. Not everyone feels comfortable dating outside their race, but studies (which looked at interracial marriages) have shown that white women are more likely to be with someone outside their race than black women.

If she has a bf and she is happy with her relationship you aren't going to get anywhere far.

Having things in common doesn't always mean you're right for eachother. A lot of people liked Star Wars when they were kids, and a lot of the interests mentioned apply to a lot of people. It goes hand in hand with the theory of barnum statements, that is statements that apply to a large group of people BUT people believe are unique (to some extent) to them.

Finally, you shouldn't use real names and places on these forums. First of all respect the privacy of people you're discussing, and 2nd if this page ever gets indexed by google and she out of randomness searches for Jenna Parker, her name, and UCR which is her school, and adds the word honors, and then THIS page comes up, you'll have a situation on your hands.
 

Flyer

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Aren't you too old to have a crush?
 

Alemayehu

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First off, thanks for the warning, I was just trying to be honest here, I try not to lie. And LOL I guess I am too old for a crush, I meant I like her. Sorry for the mixup, my linguistic skills aren't up to par it seems :)

Well, I was trying to say she never brought up her boyfriend that much when we were talking, and we like talked late into the night (1 am) and she didn't talk late with any other person there. I was just curious about what could possibly be there. I mean, she only mentioned him when I asked her to dance and when I asked "who is that guy in the picture with you" while I was checking out some stuff in her room. Anyways, more advice less hating lol
 

I'm Joe Dirt

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If she wouldn't even dance with you cause she has a bf I doubt she would do anything else either. This one is taken so move on. Even if she was interested you'd pretty much have to wait out her relationship since she doesn't look like she is going to cheat, and thats a strategy that may make you contract oneitis.
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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Alemayehu

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I see your wisdom. Thanks for the advice Joe Dirt I guess this one is a "NEXT" , quoted from the Don Juan Bible LOL
 

Dust 2 Dust

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You made your move and got shot down at the dance so there's no point in pursuing her and risk humiliating yourself further.
 
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