So I am currently dating a girl who is 5 years older than me, I am 21 and she is 26 we have good chemistry and we match irl. The problem is that lately maybe after the 4th date she would always answer my text the next day. for example, I would always text her around 10pm which is when I am free and she would reply to the text next day, always around the same time 10am. Sometimes she would reply saying that she is busy but she tells me which date she is free. At the start she would answer my texts in less than a day but since we talked about how we both dislike texting and using phone we agreed on just texting each other to set up dates(we see each other once a week). However, it kind of piss me off that whenever I ask her to meet up, she would always reply my text the next day. I do not know if she is doing it on purpose or she is not interested on me?
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She always reply to my text next day
- Thread starter jjihun
- Start date
Thank you for the insights! I actually agree with you and that might be the reason. What confuses me the most is that she actually try to find other days in which she is available for us to meetup again. And most of the time she act "interested" when we are in person, but takes a day to answer all my texts. Should I just move on? or do I still have a chance?
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She is looking at your age and viewing you as younger and sees you as beneith her. She controls the frame right now.
She sees you wanting her, and views you as an option. Take just as long if not longer to answer her. If she doesn't text then you have your answer. Then next.
Girls always make time for what matters to them.
Glassguy
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You just have to understand that women do weird things. You have no idea what is going on behind the scenes, so there is no reason to put too much stock and thought into trying to figure out why they do certain things.
In the OP's situation, I would intentionally wait 2 days to respond back to her next text. That will probably cause her to respond faster and if it doesnt, I would refuse to respond and make her double text me if she is interested.
I ran into a Japanese steakhouse on my way home from work Friday to pick up a to go order. While waiting, I saw a chick that I am friends with on FB but dont know that well. I say hi, get my food and leave. A few hours later she messages me on FB "Hey I thought that was you today but I didnt want to say anything". I just responded with "yeah, I thought you looked familiar".
Within a few messages I ask if she has any big plans for the weekend. No response until Saturday evening. On Sunday I asked her if she has tried a new restaurant yet, she says no but she would love to. I tell her "Let me know when youre free and we can meet up there for a quick drink".
She then says "If you would rather text me, my number is ______". I wait a few hours and text her. A few texts in she is asking about going out on my boat, etc. I tell her to let me know when she gets her schedule figured out and is free. Slight banter back and forth up to yesterday evening and she didnt respond to my last text. It goes to show that women will even give you their number and can dry up 2 days later. They do weird sh!t.
Who knows what happened but she knows how to reach me. The longer she waits, the more I will secretly lose interest.
No reason to think too much about it or stew over it. This should be the mindset. Either her wheels start spinning as she wonders why I am not chasing and she messages me, or I shift the little attention she got to another plate that I am banging. It is what it is.
When in doubt, go silent. They will reach out or they wont. You can always hit them with a "hey stranger" in a week to see if there is still interest there.
One thing for certain, chasing is never the answer.
In the OP's situation, I would intentionally wait 2 days to respond back to her next text. That will probably cause her to respond faster and if it doesnt, I would refuse to respond and make her double text me if she is interested.
I ran into a Japanese steakhouse on my way home from work Friday to pick up a to go order. While waiting, I saw a chick that I am friends with on FB but dont know that well. I say hi, get my food and leave. A few hours later she messages me on FB "Hey I thought that was you today but I didnt want to say anything". I just responded with "yeah, I thought you looked familiar".
Within a few messages I ask if she has any big plans for the weekend. No response until Saturday evening. On Sunday I asked her if she has tried a new restaurant yet, she says no but she would love to. I tell her "Let me know when youre free and we can meet up there for a quick drink".
She then says "If you would rather text me, my number is ______". I wait a few hours and text her. A few texts in she is asking about going out on my boat, etc. I tell her to let me know when she gets her schedule figured out and is free. Slight banter back and forth up to yesterday evening and she didnt respond to my last text. It goes to show that women will even give you their number and can dry up 2 days later. They do weird sh!t.
Who knows what happened but she knows how to reach me. The longer she waits, the more I will secretly lose interest.
No reason to think too much about it or stew over it. This should be the mindset. Either her wheels start spinning as she wonders why I am not chasing and she messages me, or I shift the little attention she got to another plate that I am banging. It is what it is.
When in doubt, go silent. They will reach out or they wont. You can always hit them with a "hey stranger" in a week to see if there is still interest there.
One thing for certain, chasing is never the answer.
pyros
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I've been in the same situation once.
Conclusion? she is not really interested in you, but she is having trouble with her boyfriend/exboyfriend/fwb so eventhough she is not really into you, she likes to go on dates to do something instead of being at home getting sad/mad/desperate about that other guy.
In my case I just made out with this chick a few times and it was a total waste of my time.
I dont like to repeat the same mistakes you know.
My advise? stop talking to this girl and find something else.
Conclusion? she is not really interested in you, but she is having trouble with her boyfriend/exboyfriend/fwb so eventhough she is not really into you, she likes to go on dates to do something instead of being at home getting sad/mad/desperate about that other guy.
In my case I just made out with this chick a few times and it was a total waste of my time.
I dont like to repeat the same mistakes you know.
My advise? stop talking to this girl and find something else.
soulforge
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The WORSE thing you could possibly do, is get emotionally involved in a woman showing low IL.
Trust me, she will continue dating you, seeing you, because she has nothing else going on.. She is filling a void..
You will more than likely never be her number one guy..
Eventually she will treat you like CHIT because you are not that valuable to her..
Been there mate.. if a girl shows low IL it's better to get out sooner than later...
You can say goodbye to your self esteem and self respect.
Trust me, she will continue dating you, seeing you, because she has nothing else going on.. She is filling a void..
You will more than likely never be her number one guy..
Eventually she will treat you like CHIT because you are not that valuable to her..
Been there mate.. if a girl shows low IL it's better to get out sooner than later...
You can say goodbye to your self esteem and self respect.
She just reply my text today from yesterday at the same usual time 10am just to tell me she is free tomorrow. So I have been reading all the advices and opinions from you guys. I came to the conclusion that she is either low interested or not interested at all. So I am just going to stop talking to her and see if she will try to reach out to me or not, and of course I will make an excuse to not meetup with her tomorrow and do something more productive.Once again thanks for the help!
El Payaso
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Is she agreeing to your dates, suggesting dates, being interested in person etc?
I do have to point out that you're texting her at 10pm. Most people who have work the next day are probably already asleep.
You say she texts you by 10am the next day. That's not too bad.
It would be bad if you texted her at 10am or noon and she didn't respond until noon the next day.
I do have to point out that you're texting her at 10pm. Most people who have work the next day are probably already asleep.
You say she texts you by 10am the next day. That's not too bad.
It would be bad if you texted her at 10am or noon and she didn't respond until noon the next day.
Yes, she is agreeing most of the time and only suggest other days when she is unavailable. She also seems interested and caring when we are in person. I know that she is currently working but even the days that I know she is not working she still takes until next day around 10am to reply my text. Yesterday I texted her at 8pm, and as expected she replied to my text today in the morning around 10am. There is no way she have not seen the message by 8pm.
As far as I know, she is currently single but that is what she told me. I was confused because she is nice to me in person. Also, this is my first time dating someone who is 5 years older than me(26).
As far as I know, she is currently single but that is what she told me. I was confused because she is nice to me in person. Also, this is my first time dating someone who is 5 years older than me(26).
SuckItUp
Senior Don Juan
She may or may not be low interest but texting at 10pm is a no-no. Texting at 10pm shows that you are too available. It doesn't mean you can't text then but you have to have your game tight and have a good reason to be texting at that time. (I.E. she gets off work around then and she initiates and even then responding should wait until the morning).
Send your texts earlier in the day. She may still not be into you but at least you'll take away the I'm asleep excuse from her and get a clearer idea regarding her interest.
Send your texts earlier in the day. She may still not be into you but at least you'll take away the I'm asleep excuse from her and get a clearer idea regarding her interest.
CMNILS87
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Wait so you text around 10pm and then get a text in the morning? What are you worrying about? She's offering other days to hang out when she's free. You're reading too much into it. You've been on 4 dates over maybe 3 weeks to a month. It's nothing serious, but she should be texting you here and there now and again to check in on you.
Take it slow man, put the heat on her during the date and get physical. I'm guessing you're not having sex yet.
Take it slow man, put the heat on her during the date and get physical. I'm guessing you're not having sex yet.
Maybe she is just so routine (obsessive compulsive ) that she checks her phone at exactly the same time all the time. Maybe that is just her.
Next time you are at her place move something and if she notices right away that could be an indicator
check to see if she washes her hands 300 times a day.
Wait, you expecting a text back at 10pm? And why are you expecting anything serious with an older women? If an older woman is taking an interest in you it's usually because she just wants to fvck. What you should be doing is setting a date, escalate and fvck her not being a needy kid. Truth is she is just having fun with you, nothing more. So enjoy it while it still lasts.
Or there is that..... waiting for the husband to go to work etc....