"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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Sex with ex-gf/my son's mother??

cdoubled05

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My ex-gf who is also the mother of my soon to be three year old child recently ended our LTR of almost five years. We have been seperated for almost a month probably. At first I wanted her back so bad and felt that I still really loved her seriously. As time went on I felt more and more like trying to fix what was broken was a bad idea. Now I am prepared for moving on and meeting new women. I am only 20 years old after all. I have started reading the DJ bible and bootcamp again. Great stuff, makes my breakup not so depressing when I think about getting with new women in future.

I still see my ex quite frequently as she is the mother of my son. I really would like to have sex with my ex again. How should I go about doing this? Should I just straight out tell her? I rubbed her leg's a little bit today when I was laying on her bed, I haven't touched her like that since we've split up. I also gave her a little kiss goodbye when she dropped my son and I off today. This is the first time I've kissed her since we brokeup. I dont want to try to fix what we had, I just want some sex.

More background info: She was my first serious relationship and the first and only girl I've ever had sex with. We started dating pretty early, like when we were both around 16 years old. She dumped me because I was not showing her enough love, respect, and understanding that would normally go along with a LTR with the mother of your child. Thanks for any advice.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Wyldfire

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It's not a good idea to try to turn the mother or father of your child into a "FB". It will just lead to a lot of nastiness. If you want to try to work out your problems and be a family, then do that. If you don't, then do NOT be more than parents to your child with each other.
 

cdoubled05

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I thought it might not be a good idea, I cant help but think about it when I'm with her though. What about maybe just one more time, would that honestly be so bad?
 

Bourne

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You will not listen to ANY advice that will be given to you. I have a friend who is in similar position as you are. He will not stop going back to her. On top of the sex its connection to the mother and the kid that is so deep it is going to be impossible to break unless you are willing to break it.

You are not ready, which in turn will make you very unhappy and depressed individual.

I'm reaching that conclusion because of how I see my friend and what he is going through, similar to yours.
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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cdoubled05

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If I didn't want advice I wouldn't have posted my problem here. I appreciate all advice from anyone who takes the time to respond. I do believe you all are correct in this matter. I will not let my emotions get the best of me. I will continue to keep our relationship sex free.
 

Bourne

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cdoubled05 said:
If I didn't want advice I wouldn't have posted my problem here. I appreciate all advice from anyone who takes the time to respond. I do believe you all are correct in this matter. I will not let my emotions get the best of me. I will continue to keep our relationship sex free.
Good to hear man.
 
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