"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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setting up a friend-too much-drama and secret

joe45

Senior Don Juan
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ok i set up my friend i knew for a while now. hes always phoning me or emailing me on "hows the woman" or you find any girls yet. hook me up. he would talk about my job and this and that, but his main reason he phone call me was-do you have any hook ups. you can just tell by his tone of voice.
so i did right with this xchange japanese student i met at the library. i didn't like her and didn't felt i could date her or she was interested in me.
i introduce him to my friend. he went out with her and like her, but the thing is he would tell me how he doesn't like Yumi since she is too short, or how her friend named Eriko is better looking and he doesn;t want me to tell Yumi this. if Yumi wasn't around he would go for Eriko...
i told him i said i won't and i don't.

the thing with him is then he gets overly parnoid and cautious. he keep on harassing me to not tell Yumi this and that and what he said. i told him i won't. he even said if he finds out from Yumi since he talks to her. he would burn my house or......etc break my neck. i am not sure why this guy is so overly parnoid and scared as to why., i even ask him and he said b/c i don't now how to word things and i just say it as it is. well if you told me not to say it i won't say it lol duh

the funny this is i have set him up 4x's and not once has he set me up. i don't think he ever will though too.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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CaptainJ

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joe45 said:
ok i set up my friend i knew for a while now. hes always phoning me or emailing me on "hows the woman" or you find any girls yet. hook me up. he would talk about my job and this and that, but his main reason he phone call me was-do you have any hook ups. you can just tell by his tone of voice.
so i did right with this xchange japanese student i met at the library. i didn't like her and didn't felt i could date her or she was interested in me.
i introduce him to my friend. he went out with her and like her, but the thing is he would tell me how he doesn't like Yumi since she is too short, or how her friend named Eriko is better looking and he doesn;t want me to tell Yumi this. if Yumi wasn't around he would go for Eriko...
i told him i said i won't and i don't.

the thing with him is then he gets overly parnoid and cautious. he keep on harassing me to not tell Yumi this and that and what he said. i told him i won't. he even said if he finds out from Yumi since he talks to her. he would burn my house or......etc break my neck. i am not sure why this guy is so overly parnoid and scared as to why., i even ask him and he said b/c i don't now how to word things and i just say it as it is. well if you told me not to say it i won't say it lol duh

the funny this is i have set him up 4x's and not once has he set me up. i don't think he ever will though too.
Mate, stop letting him use you as a tool to get girls. Next time he harasses you, just call him out on his bull**** and tell him. Don't stand for his ****, what kind of friend threatens to break your neck or burn down your house for something you haven't done. If he does it again, tell him to **** off.
 

scribblec

Senior Don Juan
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init he should be happy that he has a friend like u to set him up with women, what an ungrateful prick
 

Mars

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I don't think he ever will set you up either, he seems greedy and would probably just keep any woman he meets for himself.
 

joe45

Senior Don Juan
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scribblec said:
init he should be happy that he has a friend like u to set him up with women, what an ungrateful prick

hehe but he also says he also helps me like since i have no car, and he always using his car to drive us me and my other friend to snowshoeing, or to the gym., across the border-we are in canada...etc which i don;t even really care to go-since i been before and didn;t really enjoy it , but for some reason he always insiist i go.
he say well how about when i help you with when we drive you around with my car and my gas, its not likle i am using you with having you set me up with woman. at the same time i donl;t really care to go with him anyways.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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