Set a date 5/6 days out? (Single after LTR)

[Datinglife26]

So I am single 6 months after almost 4 years.
Went out with my buddies to a bar in our city.
I caught the eye of this absolutely beautiful woman.

We exchanged looks a few times but I just focused on having a good time with my friends since my buddy was only home to visit. I was also feeling a little rusty so didnt approach since she looked like she was with family.

It was my round so I was walking drinks from the bar back to my table. I had to pass her table, she had to move out of my way a couple of times, we locked eyes and both laughed because I was constantly walking passed her. I went to the toilets and when I came out she was in the lobby putting lipstick on (put herself near me?)

Told her we need to stop looking at each other if we arent going to talk, she laughed, got her name, her number and kept it brief before telling her to enjoy her night and went back to my friends.

I messaged her the following evening and she agreed to meet for a drink Friday night. 5 days away. I set the time and place and she agreed only requesting a slightly later time 7.30 to my 7pm time, so I told her lets do 8pm and she agreed saying it sounds good and see you then.

Now when I was single last time, I only used phone for setting dates, normally I dont text or try to talk before dates. I met my ex liked this and it drove her crazy that I wasnt easy or talking too much. She wanted jump the table to kiss me on our second date (her words)

Im seeing conflicting things about texting the day of saying "see you at 8" instead of "are we still good for tonight"

I never text or call to confirm before and have been stood up by flakey woman. So maybe its good test?

Im just a little rusty and getting back into dating. Advice welcome

 

[BackInTheGame78]

That's on her if she needs reassurance to "ask" in that way.

In this situation I would probably say something like "Looking forward to seeing you at 8pm tonight", sometime earlier in the day.

Obviously if she communicates before then, keep it fun and light and respond back.

 

[Barrister]

If she reaches out to you beforehand, I would mirror her interest level. If she is asking you questions, answer them. It means she wants reassurance you aren't an oddball/psychopath. I would not go above and beyond what she is doing and keep it minimal. That said, if she doesn't reach out, by all means keep it quiet for the most part.

If she doesn't reach out at all, I would agree with confirming the date on the day of. If you have built rapport beforehand, it can even be playful "looking forward to tonight -- wear something sexy." If you haven't texted at all, I would just keep it a little more business and confirm the time. Otherwise, maintain mystery. Less is more.

 

[Clockwerk50]

I’d argue that 5–6 days is a long time not to hear from someone. So if you don’t hear from her, I’d send her a message around day three to sort out some of the logistics, such as asking if she has any allergies or something like that. I’d also message her on the day to confirm that she’s still down.

As always, meetups like this have a higher probability of happening when the girl has high interest and takes care of the rapport. You can usually see that if she keeps the connection going by texting you every day, hecking on you, replying quickly, making jokes, telling you about her day; basically, making herself available.

 

[Solomon]

I’d argue that 5–6 days is a long time not to hear from someone. So if you don’t hear from her, I’d send her a message around day three to sort out some of the logistics, such as asking if she has any allergies or something like that. I’d also message her on the day to confirm that she’s still down.

As always, meetups like this have a higher probability of happening when the girl has high interest and takes care of the rapport. You can usually see that if she keeps the connection going by texting you every day, hecking on you, replying quickly, making jokes, telling you about her day; basically, making herself available.

This I've noticed when I started texting more Post-Covid (2020) my flake rate went down 75% (yes I keep track) I perosnally would check in every other day just to check interest or let her know that you're thinking about her (i know some may find it beta but it works)wait for her to reach out, I've noticed in my experience, women will reach out if they are excited to go. I don't see anything wrong with reaching out as I;ve stated that it has helped my flake-rate to be cut down enormously

 

[BackInTheGame78]

This I've noticed when I started texting more Post-Covid (2020) my flake rate went down 75% (yes I keep track) I perosnally would check in every other day just to check interest or let her know that you're thinking about her (i know some may find it beta but it works)wait for her to reach out, I've noticed in my experience, women will reach out if they are excited to go. I don't see anything wrong with reaching out as I;ve stated that it has helped my flake-rate to be cut down enormously

100%. I rarely got flaked on once I just stopped going ghost.

 

[Gamisch]

If a woman REALLY likes you she will wait for as long as you want het to wait.

Treat carefully tho..

 

[Datinglife26]

Update. Went with a combo of the advice you guys have me. Kept it casual and assumed tonight was still go. I didnt ask or confirm I just told her the following.

Texted this morning saying "see you later tonight *name*, looking forward to it"

Her "hey datinglife26, see you tonight "

 

[Bingo-Player]

The situation sounds unusually straightforward in this day n age

Possible you fit her physical preferences so get an automatic qualification but still seems a bit too easy on her side normally attractive women want a bit of push pull tension

Interesting let us know how it goes

 

[tksniper]

Not to toot my own horn but I still have women in different cities that matched with me on tinder that I can meet today or this weekend where I matched with them months ago, if not years ago.

The key isn’t timing. It’s about actual attraction, chemistry, and whether or not the 2 of you are on the same page.

I think a lot of advice on this forum is coming from lack of abundance and fear based.

You guys need to shift from “doingness” to “beingness.” BE high value. Don’t try to DO “high value” things. You’ll be forever guessing what the “right move” is.

Every move the high value guy does is the right move, whether he texts her in 1 day or 60 days. And every move the low value guy does is the wrong move. Let that sink in.