Seraph's Boot Camp Journal

[Seraph]

Work

First day at my new job just ended. It's a bookstore in a mall, the only one in the mall, as a matter of fact. A girl named Brandi trained me (5, 5.5) and helped me out during the course of the night.

I saw this HB 7.5 asian girl with hazel contacts come in with her boyfriend and skim around. I noticed lots of look towards my direction and messing with her hair/exposing her neck in my direction. I couldn't go over there and chat her up since Brandi was teaching me about the register and other stuff, so I had to deal with nice shots of her ass/eye contact~smile. She left shortly with her bf and I focused on my work at hand (cashing out a few customers) when she came back by herself. Even though I was taking turns with Brandi to cash people out, I made sure to step up to plate when she came. Chatted a bit, had her smiling ALOT, made sure she found everything she was looking for (seeing my sexy smile maybe, $$$) and then let her get on her way. I also noticed that women are less shy about looking you over if you are working. I got a number of glances/stares from teenage girls and some middle-aged women at the bookstore, just like I did at my old job as a waiter. I guess they feel less shy about it, or can use an excuse that they needed help. I'll figure out more on it later.


I picked up from Brandi that she thought I was a bit shy, but also said that will change if I work there long enough. We have to greet every customer that walks in, so this job should take care of my "hesitant to say hi" problem that I sometimes have. I'm still not totally relaxed (which I want to be) around strangers, and it still takes me a few days to warm up. It's just another thing I'm going to have to get over.

EDIT: I also heard Brandi drop some talk about how she is a nerd, I guess because of the way I dress or because I work out a bit (just toned, not ripped)- she must have thought I don't read alot or something. It's odd..when I'm around strangers that are "nerds", they don't see me as one of their own, and when I'm around what society deems " cool" people, I come off as cold/snotty I guess since I don't usually chat them up. Just more thoughts for you guys to mull over.

 

[Seraph]

I need to stop with the second chances.

Yea, just so you guys don't think I fell off the face of the earth, here is a post. I went to a renaissance fair today for the first time with a few buddies and one of my friends family, and it was alot of fun. Normally, since it's a Sunday I would have stayed home (as stupid as it sounds) but I decided to keeop going with the "try new things, you only live once" idea and went with them. I'm glad I did, because I was able to talk to a few strangers, make eye contact with a number of girls (surprisingly, most were in the 18-29 range and with their boyfriends). I didn't talk to any hot girls though, which would have sucked if I didn't spend the time just having a blast with my friends. That was how I spent my day, and Saturday was just spend catching up with a friend who came back from vacation. I realized two things this week:

- I will never meet these " quotas" if I just go on my normal, weekly schedule and hope that things will magically fall into place

- I do so much better when I force myself to go out and improve, be it my social skills or confidence talking to strangers or whatever.

I really did well with my social skills yesterday because when my friend came back from the Outer Banks (beach) with his family, I was able to keep a convo going (read, him talking and me keeping him going) for at least 45 minutes. Literally, it was him just telling me about what he did for the week, the things he went through and saw, all I needed to do was just pick and choose what I wanted to know more about, and lead him on that trail. Now if I can learn this week to apply this to hot girls.

This week, you ask? Yeah, that's right I'm doing this week over. Now that you're done groaning and chiding your computer screen, I have to tell you that I have no other choice. I think I talked to 3 hot girls this week (talked, not just say hi), which IMO is not enough. Being shy around people is the biggest problem I have and it won't do me any good to rush past this stage just so I can fail later down the line. Which is why I need to go out of my way this week, to multiple stores, malls, wherever and just talk to people. When I can, I'll talk to hot girls, but I need to try and get at least 1 convo on Monday (start off slow), 2 on Tuesday and so on until I get to Friday (my day off) where I can knock in however many left I need to. I'm not going to put a concrete number in besides that is has to be at least 10 girls I would fvck. I need to stop with these second chances, otherwise I'll just keep piddling around and never get to where I need to be. I think it's my fear that's still holding me back, and that needs to end this week. Sink or swim time here folks, I'll try to do my best.

 

[Seraph]

Monday- Week 3

Today was good. I got a good amount done, and hit my quota for the day. I'll try to make it as short and sweet as possible. I had 3 chokes, and 2 convos.

In the morning I started off choking two times in a row. The first was a middle-aged asian lady (her body was fvckable though, a 6.5,7 maybe) and the second was a (I don't know the specific race, but I'm going to say middle eastern/indian. She had the cloth wrapped around her head and body) girl my age. I met her in the elevator and I let the 3 seconds go by without saying anything. Some telemarketer got in on the next floor, so I made sure to not choke anymore on the elevator. The next time I was on, there were no hot girls but this guy was talking about how he is almost done with college. Once the two chunky girls he was talking with left, I started up a convo with him ( it's better than nothing, but he's a guy so he doesn't count) about school, how long he has been here and so on. Then, when school was over and I was in the elevator going home, I chatted up this girl who was with another guy about their sculpture projects (amazing how you can jump in by listening for a second). Both times my friend David (shy as well) also joined in, it seems like once you break the ice yourself everyone is able ot relax and participate.

The third choke for the day was on the metro, the lady was a african lady (like, fresh off the boat) and was somewhere between 26-30. I sat down but for some reason didn't go ahead and start talking with her. I got off the metro, tried to help this eldery black lady with her metro card at the fare machine, and went to Home Depot for some armiture wire. I need it for my sculpture that I have to make tomorrow. I couldn't find any there, so I went to Micheals.

I went in with the intent to talk up a girl, but the first two employees I see are guys. Did I ask them about the wire? Hell no. I was thinking " I didn't come here to talk to guys, where are the women at"- and then I saw her. About a 6.5, black hair, maybe spanish, I'm not sure. I went up to her, asked her about it (eye contact, smile) and even though she was new, after a long process of going with her to other employees I found the wire. I made sure to keep her near to me when the other (all female ironically) employees were trying to help me out. I did this by making sure my back was never facing her, I either stood next to her, or with my body angled towards her. Whether she thought I was cute or just bored, she didn't leave until near the end. During the course of it I asked her how long she had been working there (today was her 5th day), her name and etc. Oh yea, when she told me her name, I made sure to smile/eye contact and say " Thanks for all the help, Anna". Maybe next time I'll try to throw in some kino via handshake, but we were walking at the time with me slightly ahead of her so I didn't think to do it. All in all a productive day, tomorrow I'm going for 2 convo's. If I can pass my quota like I did today, I will hit 3.

 

[Seraph]

Tuesday- Week 3

Another good day. I met and surpassed my quota. All were at my school. Quick rundown-

1) Blonde, blue eyes/big tits (7)- simple convo about her artwork, got deep eye contact, laughter and hair pulling to expose the neck within 2 minutes of talking to her.

2) Dirty blonde, green eyes (6.5)- Found out she works at a starbucks, been working there for a year and a half. She even grabbed my vanilla frappachino (I had just gone to starbucks with a friend) and was able to tell what kind it was just by smelling it. laughter, giggling and playful type stuff came from her.

3) Another blonde, small tits (7, 7.5)- Waitress that got her hand messed up in a serving accident recently. Nothing serious or ghastly, just has her hand wrapped up in a simple bandage. She was a bit shy at first, I think she was used to guys constantly talking to her about something, so it was weird when I focused on her instead of rambling on like an AFC. Once she got going though things were fine. Light laughter and eye contact/smile her as well.

What can I say, it was blonde day There was also this brunette at the elevator but I didn't talk to her very long, so I'm not going to count it. I was really tired this morning but by the time I had some food in me in the afternoon I was in much better spirits. All these went down in the afternoon. Don't worry if your day gets off to a bad start, it's not over until you go to sleep. Don't get down and give up, keep on trying and you'll be able to pop them out like I did today. So I have 5 done, I need 5 more. My goal for tomorrow is 3, and if possible I want to get at least one on the metro. I also noticed it's easier to say hi to strangers. I saw this asian chick with a fit body (looked uppity) but with a face of a 30 year old. Thinking back to yesterday, when we made eye contact I smiled and said hi, she just seemed locked in on my eys. Didn't say hi back, her expression was kind of..frozen I guess. I can't really dsescribe it. I feel a bit better, knowing that I was able to do that since I couldn't go up to a random older asian woman yesterday.

Maybe I should have left Wednesday for the white women

EDIT: I need to work on Kino, maybe I should try to intergrate that in tomorrow.

 

[TurboLover]

White women Wednesdays. Sounds like a plan to me.

Keep it up, your in the zone. If you convo goes really good, don't forget to say before you leave. "It was nice talking to you, can I give you a call sometime?"

 

[Seraph]

Wednesday- Week 3

Thanks Turbo, I'm trying to do my best.

Today I only got 2 total, but that still brings my all around sum up to 7, and it's only halfway through the week! I noticed some things also, but let me get the two over with-

Black girl 1- Elevator, she had a model of a building for her Graphic Design class. Booty like two christmas hams were shoved down the back of her skirt. And what a tight, lovely skirt it was Her major is in Animation like mine, so I know that all hope is not lost at my school (very few hot girls). 7.5, 8 maybe.

Black girl 2- Saw this one at work, went to see if she needed anything. Convo went from her talking about how she liked cherries (don't worry, I was just as confused as you are now) to a specific book she was looking for. We didn't have it in stock so she left. Still better than nothing. She was a solid 7.

-I also saw this asian chick in the bookstore that I work at. Nice titties, and I noticed her glancing me over a bit. Probably between 20 and 30.I made eye contact and she stumbled a bit backwards It was great. I smiled at her and then she dissapeared for a bit. When I saw her again I asked her if she needed anything, she smiled and said no. I eventually cashed her out, a shame I can't try to open the shy ones up a bit more when I'm on the clock.

-White girl with a zit on her forehead was at the elevator today when I was waiting to go home.She's about a 6.5, but had those "I'm a slut librarian" glasses on. I glanced in her direction, then looked her over from head to toe. She noticed and when I made it up to her head, I maintained eye contact and smiled at her. Her face broke out into a grin and she smiled back. After we broke eye contact she tried to take the smile off but it kept coming back up. It was cute as ****. I think I might have made her day. It feels good to do that.

Oh, and I was going to start talking to a stranger on the metro, right? Well funny thing is, I was waiting for the metro and one of my classmates that I had started talking to came up and said hi. I was a bit surprised (you'll find out below) and so I decided to chat with him on the way to school. He's a cool kid, and it was kind of weird talking on the metro when everyone else was silent, but you really don't notice when you are in the depths of a convo. I'll have to try that sometime soon, with a girl. On the way home I sat next to an old man (no other seats) and he fell asleep quickly. Still I think I got a good amount done today.

But the main thing I noticed today was at school. Ever since I started talking more, people have been coming to me and trying to talk to me more. For instance, in sculpture class this one black guy came over to where me and a friend were sitting and we eventually ended up talking about the similar wire we bought for our sculptures. Another guy later in the same class commented on the food my friend and I had brought into class, and I ended up chatting with him about his sculpture and the spawn characters he uses for muscle references. It's so odd because before none of them would try to talk to me/my friend because we sort of closed ourselves off in the back. Since he is shy and usually needs me to get the ball rolling, I pretty much decided for the both of us to move towards the center of the class and get more involved in the convos. I seem to realize more and more that people just need a catalyst, they just need someone to lead the way and they will usually gladly follow. Is this is what being a Don Juan is all about?

 

[Seraph]

Almost forgot, working at the bookstore is helping my " saying hi to strangers" out alot. We have to greet every customer, and find out if they need any help, so I made sure to greet as many as I could. I knocked out at leasr 20 HI's. Major breakthrough IMO.

 

[apodyopsis]

man, im jealous, sounds like ur job is helpin ya out! im stuck behind the counter in a pharmacy, so its just russian technicians (bout 10 years plus on me, but still good for convos) or the old pharmacist. i think that environment is counter-productive for me, since i have to get used to working on my stuff alone. but ya, sounds like ur kickin a$$ on week 3, feels good great doesnt it? every lil ounce of progress feels like those rare moments when ur broke and stumble upon a 20$ bill u stashed away and forgot about (and we all know thats an awesome feeling)

 

[blue17]

it makes perfect sense that as you talk to more people, others will come to YOU to talk. They see you as a friendly, outgoing person who is easy to talk to. This is a very good result of just being social, and I hope to do the same when school starts.

If you don't mind me asking, what ethnicity are you? People subconsciously treat races differently whether they know it or not, so I am just curious is all.

 

[Seraph]

I'm black, 18 years old.

 

[Seraph]

Monday- Week 4

I didn't make an effort for the rest of the week to get any convo's in. I'm glad I got seven but I noticed now that by Thursday afternoon, I usually fade out of the " dying ot excel" zone. Maybe because it's the last day of school for the week for me, or for some other reason. I don't know, but I need to try and change it so I never fall out of the zone. What I mean is that on thursday for lunch I was dying to go eat by myself and in the last class on thursday (Film Studies) I couldn't wait to get away from the annoying people in that class and go home and chill. I was busy with friends this whole weekend (literally) with the skins game and some other sh!t, so I didn't really get alot of time to myself. It might be the old introverted me, needing to recharge. I duno, but anyway, on to the new week.

This week's goal is to get 10 rejections (someone correct me if I'm wrong). Today is labor day, and yet more time will be spent hanging out with my friends (we all have today off from work) so I'll try to get something in if I can. Tuesday I'll go for 1 rejection, wednesday for 2 and so on. It worked well last week so I'll try it this week. Really got to buckle down and get 10 though.

 

[Seraph]

Wednesday- Week 4

Man, this week has sucked for chances at getting phone numbers. School and Work have made it seem like the only free time I will actually have to get my quota is Friday-Sunday. Which is sh!tty, because I don't like to rush through crap like that. Anyway, here is some funny stuff that I've noticed at school now-

- Girls will get flustered when talking to me. I didn't conciously realize how much a little eye contact and a smile will get the panties wet until a few days ago. Like, I knew it was a good way to start out but I've been getting more and more stammers, flustered expressions and red faces while smiling/giggling. Good stuff.

-This one girl who works at a starbucks (about the same as the other girl) made it clear to me and most of the other kids that I sit by that she wanted to follow my friend and I to starbucks. Today she basically begged and I made her wait (I wasn't ready to go yet). When we left, I lead the way, with her tagging along and my friend behind her. The class wasn't talking much and I'm sure her AFC whipping boy was giving me dagger eyes (he sucks up to her so much). When we got to Starbucks, she took my money, ordered the drink I wanted (and something for herself), got the discount, and got me my drink. What makes it even better was talking to some people and hearing her ask to go to starbucks. Like a little girl wanting to spend some time with me. Hillarious.

- People actually vie for my attention. Like, they'll turn towards me, try to get eye contact, talk facing me, pause if another tries to take away my attention, a variety of stuff. One afc even came up to my friend and asked for something. While my friend was getting it the AFC tried to initiate a convo (wuss like, IMO) by saying a name he saw on the magazine page I was reading. I don't like him (I think he's fake) so I ignored him and kept on doing my own thing. Funny as sh!t when he left.

-People you don't like, get the hint quick as crap and most of the time will stay out of you way, like you'll beat their ass if they dont. The one guy I mentioned above, last class was sitting somewhat across from me. I ignored him and talked to everyone around him, didn't laugh at his jokes, etc etc. Today in class he sat on the faaaaar end of the room and the other people that like to talk to me filled his spot. I mean he had plenty of oppurtunity to sit where he sat last time, but it's like he chose the seat farthest out of my eye sight.

In my last Intro to 2d class, there was a blonde. I've seen her around, but she usually has an iPod on and is minding her own business. We've had eye contact and she's somewhat cute, so I decided to talk to her today. I had a flash of AFC-ness, and almost didn't talk to her just because her iPod was on. I sat next to her, and she did the whole check the cell phone, look around bs. As soon as I tapped her arm and started talking to her, her eyes got big and she got red in the face and was smiling up a storm. After getting her name (Joanie) and introducing myself, I told her that I always saw her act so quiet in class. She said " yea, I usually just keep to myself". I couldn't help but say " I know what you mean "...sheesh..just 2 months ago I wouldn't have even sat by her, much less talk to her. Now I just have to get these rejections

 

[apodyopsis]

ur right on about people tryin 2 fight for attention. if i want to be outgoing it shows, probably through body language? and when i want my space i get it

i dunno if uve read up on open/friendly body language, but maybe thats something people should consciously make sure they apply during the day? just a thought, might be worth the effort

anyway dude, keep it up man. it helps knowin ur about where i am, just a lil ahead. helps knowin im not the only one doin this. we need to suck it up and go all the way! Waldens journal initially inspired me to start, so lets try n hit week 8, were already seein big improvements, so why not get the whole experience? hopefully a small handful of people will wanna start their own if we make it, and they'll inspire others, and pretty soon, the DJ birthrate will go up a little

no matter what im doing, how long it takes, i vow to finish... u with me?

 

[Seraph]

Sure thing man. We've gone this far, why stop now?

 

[Seraph]

Progress, even if it's a slow start

Friday- Week 4

Well, I made some progress today. Only not the kind I needed. Today for the rejections I decided to go back to where my confidence shattered a week or two ago, which was Potomic Mills. As I was walking in, I told myself that I wouldn't leave until I approached at least one girl.

As I walked around, I saw a cute girl here or there at those kiosk (stands in the middle of the mall) but they were usually with another person or with a customer. I was about to approach this cute hb7 in a shoestore but she was laughing at another girls joke. I choked and went to the bathroom to take a piss. I went in the Sport's Authority, choked on 2 girls and stopped myself and realized that I didn't want to end this outing on a bad note. I have to rise above all the other AFC's that just look at girls they want to fvck and go out and get them. So I turned around and went back to where the girls were. They were gone . I said ok, I just have to learn how to be ready at a moment's notice to approach. I walked out and went into some second rate department store (the name escapes me at the moment) and saw this cute black hb7 (with a nice ass). She was putting shoes up in a shoe rack but I just sucked it up and went towards her with a smile.

Me: Hi, how's it going
Her:Hi.
Me: I know you're busy, but I was wondering if you would like to go out sometime.
Her: How old are you?
Me: 18. You?
Her: 26. What, are you just out to get numbers today?
Me: (inside my head= + ) Nah, I was bored so I came out here today. I saw you, so I thought what the hell.
Her: Oh..o + ) I'm flattered.
Me: So is that a no?
Her: No..I'll go out with you
Me: Cool. What's your number?
*I get the number*
Her: What's your name?
Me:Seraph. What's yours?
Her: Trina
Me: *handshake suggested by the dj bible) Well it's nice to meet you Trina. I'll call you sometime.
Her: Ok, you do that.

I walked away feeling like a million bucks. The only bad news is that I didn't find any more targets that I would have liked to go for. There were either teenage girls with braces (looked like they're 15) working or the cute girls by the kisoks. And I'm know I'm not confident enough to put myself totally out there with passerby strangers. I can do this stuff, I just need a good,steady start. No rejections yet, I'll try harder tomorrow.

 

[Seraph]

What I don't get is, why must girls always think I'm playing them? My last girlfriend sent me an e-mail before I dumped her talking about " I know you're probably dating other girls, but I was wondering where we stand". And now this " are you out to get numbers?" deal. I have to realize why girls think I'm a fvcking DJ and actually grasp that I can get almost any girl I want. I am still not totally sure if it's the other people around that freeze me up (embarrasement I guess?) or if it's because I'm not as totally assure of myself as I seem to others. Or maybe it's both. Either way, I need to somehow get it in my head that I'm slick
sh!t. If I do, I'll be able to approach all the time and the pvssy will be rolling in.

Note- I also totally forgot about others around (granted, there were not many) Trina when I approached her. Just another thing I need to bash into my head- Outsiders all but dissapear when you're focused on an approach.

 

[dualman7]

I actually read every single entry of yours. I decided to go ahead with the boot camp. Did you read other people's journals, or did u jump right into it.

 

[Seraph]

Holy crap, every entry? I thought most just skimmed. I hope I didn't bore you too much I started after skimming a few, but reading Walden's. His was the only one that I read past week 2. That guy has some serious balls and wasn't nearly as introverted as I was when I started this out.

Like I told Apod, if you need any support or help just PM me. I'm betting I'm shyer than most here so my bootcamp might not be as quick or sucessful as the others- but it's how I'm going about this and I'll be glad to give my help to any who need or desire it. Good luck man, we're all rooting for ya.

 

[DharmaBear]

Seraph - I'm most impressed by your progress. I'm a strugglinhg AFC myself, and I've just today decided I'm going to start the bootcamp. Your entries are really inspiring, and are validating my decision. Keep up the good work!

-Dharma

 

[Seraph]

I'm really bad with crowds.

Thanks DB. Good luck.

I found out today I'm really bad with crowds. I went to the mall with the intention of going to a female store and going up to one of the cashiers and asking for their number. I thought this would help me with the fear of asking in public, but saturday was a bad day to start this. I was thinking sink or swim, so I tried Forever 21. Bad idea. Lots of girls there. In twos, in threes, some mothers with their kids. Too many people. I'm not ready for that yet.

So I go to best buy, and it's even worse there. Full of guys, fat girls and families. I have noticed a trend in my progress, where I get a little sucess, get impatient, and try to do stuff I'm not ready for. Then I wonder why I fail . I need to take it slow, baby steps with this. I'm going to go for single girl approaches when I can, but I really need to knock out the fear of talking to 2 girls at once. Girls are always walking around with one of their friends, so once I get over the fear of going up to a pair of them, I should be on my way.

Failure for the day, but I only have one day of work next week. I really need to make the extra effort then and go for it.