"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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SelfEsteem booster!

G

gargamel

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My neighbour (23, HB7) is a class A bytch. She's been bytchin about the apple tree going over the fence lately and I had enough of it.

Five minutes ago, as she was coming to my front door and I heard her mumbling to herself "oh my god, these neighbours are pigs, they need to learn to live in a community, yada, yada"

I really had enough of her and I thought of a way to surprise her.. :D
I was just about to take a shower and was fully undressed in my bathroom when she r.a.p.e.d the doorbell. As I started opening the door, she already started - garga, I thought I told you to cut that DAMN... OH MY FVCKING GOD, MOM! MOM!

There was I, butt naked, with my schlong in plain view - she actually ran away screaming for her mommy..
:crackup: :crackup: :crackup: :crackup: :crackup:

I just can't stop laughing!

She better not come bytchin for more! :D:D:D
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Q

Q-Pid

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You shoulda turned on the charm :)

LOL!
 
F

Francisco d'Anconia

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Not trying to take away from your personal victory, but are you saying that flashing is a self esteem booster?
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

Read more...

A

Alpine

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Unfortunately, those are just the kind of women who will be straight down the police station and have you convicted as a sex case.
 
D

DirtMcGirtRIP

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That's illegal, dude

Dude, the fact that that boosted your self-esteem makes you sick. The word for what you did is exhibitionism, and it is classified as a psychological disorder.

I'm not calling you an exhibitionist because this is not your preferred method of sexual arousal. However, the fact that it did give you good feelings (boosted your self-esteem and made you feel manly, I presume), shows that you have tendencies of this disorder. You should refrain from doing anything like this again. Why? It's illegal and you could go to jail for it!! And get a very bad reputation!

(I learned about this stuff in my Human Sexuality uni course, so I know what I'm talking about.)
 
A

Alpine

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Who says she will tell the truth?

This is the classic peeping tom/flasher scenerio, you just can't win if you are a bloke.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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A

al77

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Originally posted by Alpine
Who says she will tell the truth?

This is the classic peeping tom/flasher scenerio, you just can't win if you are a bloke.
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Intersting, who are they - in teh police dept? all women?
Or they are all AFC minded chumps?
 
F

frivolousz21

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Dude, the fact that that boosted your self-esteem makes you sick. The word for what you did is exhibitionism, and it is classified as a psychological disorder.
Click to expand...

chill out..it mgiht of been the first **** she has seen in a while

she will have sexual fantasies of u now :)
 
D

DirtMcGirtRIP

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Don't tell me to chill, fool. All I'm doing is giving information about the law and modern psychology's view on the situation. I ain't hatin.
 
L

LuckyStrike

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Holy crap is that funny!

I'm going to have to try that on my neighbor. The problem is, she's an old geezer and she'll probably keel over and then I'll have to dispose of the body and all of that stuff...on second thought, maybe not.
 
W

whistler

Master Don Juan
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Re: That's illegal, dude

Originally posted by DirtMcGirtRIP
Dude, the fact that that boosted your self-esteem makes you sick. The word for what you did is exhibitionism, and it is classified as a psychological disorder.

I'm not calling you an exhibitionist because this is not your preferred method of sexual arousal. However, the fact that it did give you good feelings (boosted your self-esteem and made you feel manly, I presume), shows that you have tendencies of this disorder.
Click to expand...
No offense. That's crap.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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T

t00dumb

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Miami
Re: That's illegal, dude

Originally posted by DirtMcGirtRIP
Dude, the fact that that boosted your self-esteem makes you sick. The word for what you did is exhibitionism, and it is classified as a psychological disorder.

I'm not calling you an exhibitionist because this is not your preferred method of sexual arousal. However, the fact that it did give you good feelings (boosted your self-esteem and made you feel manly, I presume), shows that you have tendencies of this disorder. You should refrain from doing anything like this again. Why? It's illegal and you could go to jail for it!! And get a very bad reputation!

(I learned about this stuff in my Human Sexuality uni course, so I know what I'm talking about.)
Click to expand...
oh yea i learned that too in my sexuality class also. he's correct but he's not an exhibitionist because he does not go out on very purpose to get a hard on. he did it as a retailation to her attitude with the present situation. well done my friend lol.
 
G

gargamel

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OK, chill out ppl!

I said self-esteem booster, cause I thoughtI'd NEVER have the balls to do something like this.

I just wanted to laugh, actually - cause I'm having a very shytty day! I laugh every time I remember her face when she saw Mr. Mirko - she covered her big yap with her hands and screamed: MOMMY!
I think thats the funniest shyt that happened to me in my whole lifetime!!

Anyways, it's my home.. I can wear what the fvck I want to at my home. I planned to invite her in for a cup of coffee, but things kinda got outa hand :D:D

OK, here in slovenia, people don't know what exibitioning is, cause here no one does it... She sent her big macho boyfriend later today.. He came by and started asking what happened. I yelled at him, saying that she didn't introduce herself when I asked who it was, so I thought it was my sister.. And she interrupted me while showering! The nerve!

We talked for a little bit after that.. and we even made a deal - he wants to sell me his car.. He told me he sees I'm a cool guy and that his girlfriend likes overreacting to stuff.. :D
 
W

whistler

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Re: Re: That's illegal, dude

Originally posted by t00dumb
oh yea i learned that too in my sexuality class also. he's correct but he's not an exhibitionist because he does not go out on very purpose to get a hard on. he did it as a retailation to her attitude with the present situation. well done my friend lol.
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Exactly!
 
C

check_mate_kid_uk

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so in the usa its legal to shoot osme one for being on your property with out permision, but you go to prision for answering the door nakid, thats just messed up :p
 
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22 Rules for Massive Success With Women
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