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Seeking Advice: Moving on or reconnect?

Voric

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Hey everyone,

I've been facing a dilemma and could really use some guidance. Back in December 2021 (although I've known her since October 2021), I developed feelings for this amazing girl. It's worth mentioning that during that time, I was going through a tough period due to my parents' separation, and she was there for me, offering her support. Since March 2022, she's been aware of my feelings for her.

However, despite our connection and the bond we share, she's always maintained that I'm not ready for a relationship. Around two months ago, she made it clear that she only wants to be friends. Consequently, we haven't had any contact since then.

Now, I find myself at a crossroads. Should I reach out to her again, especially considering the positive changes (glow up) I've experienced in the meantime? Or should I focus on moving on? The truth is, I genuinely care about her, and it's been a year and a half since these feelings started.

I would greatly appreciate any insights, suggestions, or personal experiences any of you might have. How can I approach this situation? Should I attempt to reconnect or focus on healing and moving forward? If the latter, what are some strategies to help me get over her?

Thank you all for your support. I look forward to your valuable advice and input.

Best regards,
Voric
 

CornbreadFed

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However, despite our connection and the bond we share, she's always maintained that I'm not ready for a relationship. Around two months ago, she made it clear that she only wants to be friends. Consequently, we haven't had any contact since then.
You are in a Prince Disney mindset right now. You need to leave this poor girl alone and move on.
 

ThisIsSparta

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This woman has friendzoned you long ago and you are not going to dig yourself out of that hole.

Reconnecting will only result in wasted time and pain for you.

Stop having "feelings" for a woman that didnt show any desire for you.

If she wanted you, shed got you back in 2021.

Move on
 

Voric

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This woman has friendzoned you long ago and you are not going to dig yourself out of that hole.

Reconnecting will only result in wasted time and pain for you.

Stop having "feelings" for a woman that didnt show any desire for you.

If she wanted you, shed got you back in 2021.

Move on
if it was that easy i would… and how should i cant get her out of my fcking head
 

Pierce Manhammer

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if it was that easy i would… and how should i cant get her out of my fcking head
Lay 10 chicks see how quickly you’ll forget her.

Seriously broheem, listen to the assembled, you’re holding a torch for a girl that’s sidelined you a loooong time ago.

Is she still Snow White in your mind when you think of her getting railed by the guys she’s been dating since she punted you?

Its a harsh thing to say, but sometimes you need to hear it that way to shake a guy from his delusion.
 

ThisIsSparta

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if it was that easy i would… and how should i cant get her out of my fcking head
How did you manage that..... falling that hard for a chick that never let you put your dyck into her?

Most likely she has been on a couple of dycks since 2021, not thinking twice about your feelings for her.

Whatever hollywood and society told you about women, forget it, its all a scam!

Men are the only true romantics out there and thats why nice guys finish last.


How to get her out of your head.......

use your time to work on yourself. Stop chasing (that) woman, chase excellence...... hit the gym, maybe you are in a sports team and could train harder for success, work on your education..... these are things that will pay off with women over time.

You are quite young, i personally know the struggle is real at that age to get pvssy but RIGHT NOW, you need to focus on yourself and set yourself up for success in the future.
 

Voric

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How did you manage that..... falling that hard for a chick that never let you put your dyck into her?

Most likely she has been on a couple of dycks since 2021, not thinking twice about your feelings for her.

Whatever hollywood and society told you about women, forget it, its all a scam!

Men are the only true romantics out there and thats why nice guys finish last.


How to get her out of your head.......

use your time to work on yourself. Stop chasing (that) woman, chase excellence...... hit the gym, maybe you are in a sports team and could train harder for success, work on your education..... these are things that will pay off with women over time.

You are quite young, i personally know the struggle is real at that age to get pvssy but RIGHT NOW, you need to focus on yourself and set yourself up for success in the future.
im 17 -.- never touched a women sadly. too insecure
 

Voric

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Lay 10 chicks see how quickly you’ll forget her.

Seriously broheem, listen to the assembled, you’re holding a torch for a girl that’s sidelined you a loooong time ago.

Is she still Snow White in your mind when you think of her getting railed by the guys she’s been dating since she punted you?

Its a harsh thing to say, but sometimes you need to hear it that way to shake a guy from his delusion.
i didnt even have my first kiss wdymm
 

CornbreadFed

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You’re only 17, don’t freak out. Early bloomers usually end up in bad situations by 25 anyway.
 

Voric

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just a extra question how do i get to know other girls. like insta or go clubbing or idk.. im an introvert.-.
 

Murk

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I didn't lose my V until I was 19, I was also too insecure (thought my D was small/weird), and my late teens were a painful existence.

You're young so I would try to reconnect with her and hopefully bang.

just a extra question how do i get to know other girls. like insta or go clubbing or idk.. im an introvert.-.
School, friends, family friends, cold approach (much easier at your age compared to late 20s/30s imo).
 

Voric

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You’re only 17, don’t freak out. Early bloomers usually end up in bad situations by 25 anyway.
just a extra question how do i get to know other girls. like insta or go clubbing or idk.. im an introvert.-.
 

CornbreadFed

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just a extra question how do i get to know other girls. like insta or go clubbing or idk.. im an introvert.-.
We can give you the best and most insightful advice acquired from our negative and positive experiences with women, but you need to acquire those on your own through trial and error. Just follow two principles:

Don’t chase a bvtch like you are doing now and don’t get a bvtch pregnant

Have funnnn
 

Black Widow Void

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Welcome aboard Voric

From the looks of most responses, it's apparent that many of these members are attracted to females, but really don't like females (or themselves) or understand their own human behavior. At 17, you may be thinking that everyone here is worldly wise. It's not the case.

It's been quite a long time since I was 17, but I remember those teenage years and and living through divorced parents like it was yesterday.

I'm sure that you'd like to read some advice on how to reconnect with your female interest, but it's really not that easy. Life for you will be simpler and less complicated if you focus on other girls. But what other members here have not addressed is ... it's not as though you can turn off some switch and immediately get her out of your thoughts.

I'll say in advance that no advice is 100% affective for every girl. I'm almost 60 and while it might appear that I may be out of touch with your generation, there's certain psychologies that never age-out out no matter the age.

Again, I'd suggest focusing on other things (and other girls). In the meantime, I'd suggest that you only speak to this current female-interest if she speaks to you first. And if and when she does, you keep it light and casual. Do your best to not appear overjoyed or too invested. You do not want to appear as if you are waiting on what she'll say next. Instead, appear upbeat, confident (and not butt hurt) but end the conversation first. I realize that this sounds like a game (which I ordinarily do not condone) . In actuality, your actions (or lack of) will "even the playing field."

If she sees you having fun (even if it's just getting attention from your friends) it looks good in their eyes. The trick is... do not be conspicuous. You do not want to appear as if you're 'acting for an audience.' Truth is, in high school, there are times when we all acted for an audience, but part of the act is looking like you're not acting.

My guess is that you may currently be in the 'walking wounded' stage (on the outside we may appear fine, but inside there's confusion). The more independent you become from this particular female situation, the quicker this 'haze' or 'fog' will clear in your head.

There's no guarantee, but the more 'free' you become, she may come around (if things don't click instantly with a girl, then you'll likely discover that a lot of females are usually attracted to men they cannot easily have). Actually, we men are no different.

Again, my advice is to move forward. I realize that it's a lot easier when there's more female options. Don't let the other members here fool you. We all go through dry spells with women. Even if there's no current other female, focus on a hobby or your school work (this will help to clear your mind of this girl).

Sorry to read about your folks going through a divorce. A lot of members here went through the same thing. This may be a place where you can get some advice about that too. If nothing more, you'll be among a lot of members that have gone through this before.

I've been on this forum for quite a while. My goal is to reduce my presence and make room for newer members. I chose to respond to your post because it was my opinion that certain things you mentioned weren't being addressed. I'll take no offense if my response is out of touch. On the other hand, if you think that I can be of further help, you're welcome to send an e-mail.
 
Last edited:

EyeOnThePrize

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just a extra question how do i get to know other girls. like insta or go clubbing or idk.. im an introvert.-.
Join leagues and sports clubs, do the things you enjoy that just so happen to have girls around. For example dancing or gymnastics or dog training or martial arts, experiment. Remember, you're going there to learn and hone new skills, the girls are just a bonus and not at all necessary for you to have a good time.

When a girl shows that she's not attracted to you, you should feel aversion, you shouldn't like her more. If you still like her or like her more after she's shown disinterest, you're telling her and the universe that you deserve to be rejected and treated like garbage. Find the girls that kiss the ground you walk on and focus on them. If there aren't many then hit the gym and the books until you're higher value.

We can give you the best and most insightful advice acquired from our negative and positive experiences with women, but you need to acquire those on your own through trial and error. Just follow two principles:

Don’t chase a bvtch like you are doing now and don’t get a bvtch pregnant

Have funnnn
If you refer to all women as bitches, you're bound to get a biitch.
 

Dr.Suave

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Move on. Meet more girls
 

Voric

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Welcome aboard Voric

From the looks of most responses, it's apparent that many of these members are attracted to females, but really don't like females (or themselves) or understand their own human behavior. At 17, you may be thinking that everyone here is worldly wise. It's not the case.

It's been quite a long time since I was 17, but I remember those teenage years and and living through divorced parents like it was yesterday.

I'm sure that you'd like to read some advice on how to reconnect with your female interest, but it's really not that easy. Life for you will be simpler and less complicated if you focus on other girls. But what other members here have not addressed is ... it's not as though you can turn off some switch and immediately get her out of your thoughts.

I'll say in advance that no advice is 100% affective for every girl. I'm almost 60 and while it might appear that I may be out of touch with your generation, there's certain psychologies that never age-out out no matter the age.

Again, I'd suggest focusing on other things (and other girls). In the meantime, I'd suggest that you only speak to this current female-interest if she speaks to you first. And if and when she does, you keep it light and casual. Do your best to not appear overjoyed or too invested. You do not want to appear as if you are waiting on what she'll say next. Instead, appear upbeat, confident (and not butt hurt) but end the conversation first. I realize that this sounds like a game (which I ordinarily do not condone) . In actuality, your actions (or lack of) will "even the playing field."

If she sees you having fun (even if it's just getting attention from your friends) it looks good in their eyes. The trick is... do not be conspicuous. You do not want to appear as if you're 'acting for an audience.' Truth is, in high school, there are times when we all acted for an audience, but part of the act is looking like you're not acting.

My guess is that you may currently be in the 'walking wounded' stage (on the outside we may appear fine, but inside there's confusion). The more independent you become from this particular female situation, the quicker this 'haze' or 'fog' will clear in your head.

There's no guarantee, but the more 'free' you become, she may come around (if things don't click instantly with a girl, then you'll likely discover that a lot of females are usually attracted to men they cannot easily have). Actually, we men are no different.

Again, my advice is to move forward. I realize that it's a lot easier when there's more female options. Don't let the other members here fool you. We all go through dry spells with women. Even if there's no current other female, focus on a hobby or your school work (this will help to clear your mind of this girl).

Sorry to read about your folks going through a divorce. A lot of members here went through the same thing. This may be a place where you can get some advice about that too. If nothing more, you'll be among a lot of members that have gone through this before.

I've been on this forum for quite a while. My goal is to reduce my presence and make room for newer members. I chose to respond to your post because it was my opinion that certain things you mentioned weren't being addressed. I'll take no offense if my response is out of touch. On the other hand, if you think that I can be of further help, you're welcome to send an e-mail.
you are a ****ing god. thanks for the advice i needed that fr. do you have any advice how to talk to girls.. like i went 3 times to a club. everytime there were sum girls which i found attractive. I wanted to talk to them but i couldnt my brain stopped me or smth idfk..
 
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