"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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See-sawing over a girl, what should I do?

The LadyKiller

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Can girls change? Can a girl who, six months ago, give you a fake phone number now be genuinely be interested? I might be on the verge of finding out. Let me explain:

Awhile ago, I met a HB 8.5. She had a close girl friend who seemed to have it in for me (to this day I don't know why; mutual friends say it was something very trivial). When this friend was around, HB 8.5 would alternate being nice and b*tchy. When I suggested we hang out, HB said yes, then gave me a fake number and was otherwise immature. She was immediately nexted. :trouble: Around this time, I learned the mutual friends didn't care for 8.5's good friend either; they thought she was pretentious and tried to get away with her good looks. Apparently, the friend did this immature bs a lot and it perhaps influenced the HB ("act of solidarity" as one friend said). This got me wondering: what would happen if the HB's friend left and went far far away?

Well, that's exactly what happened. Soon after her friend moved 1000 miles away :wave: , relations between me and the HB warmed up. Slowly and gradually, as a result of having to see her often, we began getting along well. Recently, some of my other plates have been slowing (I'm getting the runaround or they keep the conversation at smalltalk). HB 8.5 has suddenly become one of the few HB's who is intelligent and can hold a conversation. She laughs at my jokes, she actively engages in the conversation, we have several similarities with values/morals/etc. She'll even open up and talk about things she wouldn't want others to know about. We get along way better than even at the time I met her. However, she seems to like playing hard to get (problem with a girl being smart). I usually initiate things since I'm an outgoing guy. But when I don't, she is conveniently "around" until I acknowledge her. In both cases, she seems happy to talk/chill. It's weird. :confused: This week, we were talking and she was doing the dangling-shoe-off-the-tip-of-her-foot trick. I don't know if it's a sign or if it means nothing - the web suggests it might be a big flirting sign - so I figured I'd mention it here.

Could this girl have changed? Like an elephant, I never forget. I still remember what happened six months ago and it gives me some pause. At the same time, it seems her entire attitude has changed. To put it briefly, I can't tell if she is leading me on or not, and I don't want to get burned again. What do you make of this?
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

Read more...

Purefilth

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Options,
1. smash her back doors in and move on
2. get stuck in the friendzone
3.askher about the fake numbe, making her feel real awkward so she never talks to you again out of embarrasment
 

JohnChops

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Uh oh sounds like a case of.oneitis is brewing. Go out with her and if she flakes again then forget her. And yes girls.do change . I used to know this girl who was a complete ***** and.a ***** to everyone. Now she's actually kind and not a huge *****. But you still never know so judge by her actions not her worthless words.
 

The LadyKiller

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Yeah, going for it might be the best option. My only pause, as mentioned before, is what happened six months ago. I don't want to get burned twice by the same girl. But maybe she's changed?

JohnChops, I'm aware of the "oneitis" fear, but I think more of it is I'm in a little rut. My other plates have slowed down considerably (I keep getting the runaround or they won't get past smalltalk), this HB is one of the only single girls I know who seems to have an interest when we interact.
 

JohnChops

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The LadyKiller said:
Yeah, going for it might be the best option. My only pause, as mentioned before, is what happened six months ago. I don't want to get burned twice by the same girl. But maybe she's changed?

JohnChops, I'm aware of the "oneitis" fear, but I think more of it is I'm in a little rut. My other plates have slowed down considerably (I keep getting the runaround or they won't get past smalltalk), this HB is one of the only single girls I know who seems to have an interest when we interact.

Right there your putting to much emphasis on having a woman in your life. Why not ignore all these plates for a bit and work on your life, do some hobbies, stay busy. Then strike up a conversation after a bit or hang out with one of them. You dont really need to even talk to your plates unless its to set up a date or small conversations just to lay ground work anyway. But I understand where you are, Im there too, I just dont care because women are nothing :p
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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