"I just moved here from Florida."
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
says she just got out of a long relationship, not ready for anything yet. now what?
- Thread starter duke104
- Start date
"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
Iceberg
Master Don Juan
That sounds good. Maybe I'll hit ya up sometime to hang out when I get a day off. Yeah, I kind of just got out of a serious relationship so I'm not really interested in anything serioud but hanging out sounds cool.
Iceberg is right on the moneyIceberg said:
Translation: That sounds good. I'm telling you that I will call you sometime to give you hope that something will happen between us. Notice that I didn't mention any time, any day and any place. It's because it mostly not going to happen. I just thought that if I mention the serious relationship (excuse that I give to nice guys that I don't wanna date) you will get the point. I'm not interested in anything serious with you (no date for you), but if I'm bored and I need to waste time before my date with a guy that's going to give me the good stuff I will call you, and discuss (mostly complaining about my ex-boyfriend) about how it would have be good if he was just like you. (which is a lie too).Robert28 said:
Answer: DROP ASAP
"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
Awesome translation! Seriously this is one of the best translations of a woman giving you the "just got out of a relationship card" that I have ever seen. Congrats! Every newbie should read that and understand itbadboyjmm said:
Can you explain to me what you mean by "girl i been talking to for a little bit"?
I'm going to assume that you befriended her, talk to her often and have talked to her for some time before you even got the balls to ask her out (which I don't know if you have or not). Sounds to me that she saw your advances coming and decided to shut you down before you asked her out (correct me if wrong).
Try changing your mentality to a DJ mentality. Don't give women your precious time unless they deserve it.
If you "talk to them a little bit," trying to be their friend, trying to get to know them, trying to impress them before you get the balls to ask them out you will end up in situations like the friend zone which you seem to be in now.
You are killing the mystery with women before even going out with them.
From now on try doing this. Don't "talk to them a little bit" but when you find a nice girl you like just ask them out. Don't try to be their friend, don't try to get to know them, don't waste your time on them trying to get on their good side hoping she will start liking you (kinda what happened here it seems). Keep your interactions with women at a professional level until they agree to explore a possible relationship and this is done by going out.
Instead set the tone right from the start that you see yourself as a possible lover not a friend by asking them out early into your encounters with her. That way you won't be wasting your time and she giving you excuses after you spend time talking to her "a little bit" and killing your hopes.
UPDATE:
If I meet a girl I want to get with I don't like to spend more than 10 minutes of my time talking to her without asking her out. I want to reveal as little information about myself as possible. I want to remain mysterious, i want to remain an enigma, i don't want to kill my chances with her before even going out on a date. You need to make them "pay" to get to know you and they do that by investing their time with you on dates.
badboyjmm said:
oh i got the hint as soon as the last word rolled out of her mouth. i didn't say "ok, hope you call, i'll be looking for it!". just kinda said "mmmm ok well bye" and turned around and off i went. i just had never heard a girl use the version i got, it's was a more dressed up version of what the original poster asked about.
PapiChulo
Master Don Juan
"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"
You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.
She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.
Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.
Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.