"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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"Romantic Rivalry" ??

iqqi

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joekerr31 said:
iqqi...

if you had bought him a beer, i guarantee you that if he was interested in you he would have come and found you before leaving and thanked you for the beer and probably asked you out.
He didn't have to find me, I was RIGHT THERE. I think he stuck around longer, waiting for OA to leave, but OA wouldn't leave, so Crush finally had to go. That is when I made my last comment.

And I was under the impression that finding a chick that you connect with, that is interesting to talk to, was not a dime a dozen. ?
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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joekerr31

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iqqi said:
And I do appreciate your feedback on the whole exchange between me and Crush, because I like other viewpoints, and sometimes do catch an interesting idea, however I am not asking for advice on that. I had that part down just fine and how I liked it. THAT part went great.

Its the FRIEND. The FRIEND.

iqqi - 6 f*cking years!

you know why my advice to men is to JUST ASK HER OUT?

you know why i say that? cuz at least it goes one way or another. either you get the date or you dont and you can move on with life.

its ABSURD and a waste of time and emotion to have a 'crush' on someone for 6 years. a total waste.

you can rationalize it as ****blocking, but has your friend always been at your side ****blocking you for the past 6 years?

give me a break.
 

Mr.Positive

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iqqi said:
Ok, ok, I have to say it. YOU guys might not be used to OVERTNESS from a woman. But guess what. It aint that rare.

Women throw themselves on men all the time. There were a few that did just that while I was over there. I think I stood out by NOT doing that. I was the only one HE was going to. Girls were coming over to him... OVERTLY.

And I see that sh!t all the time.
You are confusing being overt, and throwing yourself at the guy. THAT happens all the time, especially when booze is involved.

See, this is how women think sometimes.

You CAN be overt, and still be respectful. That's something that's rare, IMO.
 

joekerr31

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iqqi said:
And I was under the impression that finding a chick that you connect with, that is interesting to talk to, was not a dime a dozen. ?
they aren't.

and im not even saying your friend didn't ****block you. but even if she did, you still ****blocked yourself way more than she did by not knowing how to differentiate yourself - by relying solely on flirting and covert communication.
 

iqqi

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joekerr31 said:
iqqi - 6 f*cking years!

you know why my advice to men is to JUST ASK HER OUT?

you know why i say that? cuz at least it goes one way or another. either you get the date or you dont and you can move on with life.

its ABSURD and a waste of time and emotion to have a 'crush' on someone for 6 years. a total waste.

you can rationalize it as ****blocking, but has your friend always been at your side ****blocking you for the past 6 years?

give me a break.
It wasn't the GF that was the c0ckblocker, it was the old acquaintance.

And it isn't some real crush, I told you that. Just some guy I've always thought was really cool and interesting. It wasn't until recently that I realized I might want to date this guy. So when he showed up... well damn! THAT was a pleasant surprise. AND it was looking to end just how I wanted it to.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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iqqi

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Mr.Positive said:
You are confusing being overt, and throwing yourself at the guy. THAT happens all the time, especially when booze is involved.

See, this is how women think sometimes.

You CAN be overt, and still be respectful. That's something that's rare, IMO.

Posi, I WENT OVER THERE, lol. How much more OVERT could I be? Don't tell me, don't tell me. I could also have bought him a beer, and a bunch of other things.

Talk about overkill!
 

joekerr31

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Mr.Positive said:
You are confusing being overt, and throwing yourself at the guy. THAT happens all the time, especially when booze is involved.

See, this is how women think sometimes.

You CAN be overt, and still be respectful. That's something that's rare, IMO.

EXACTLY.

being overt doesn't mean being a slut. you can be overt and classy at the same time.

what blows my mind is how most men dont know that women think exactly like iqqi does.

if only they know they would slap themselves in the face for being so afraid to approach a woman. or letting such a bewildered creature bust their balls.

women are filled with insecurity and cannot be OVERT in communicating what they want.

they simply fluff up their feathers and hope that its enough to get them what they want.
 

ketostix

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Another problem besides your game Iqqi, is you have poor choice in guys and friends. I get the sense you were only into this guy because you think he's financially successful and goodlooking. The guy seems like bonehead from the way you explained the situation, and your friend is shady. Your friend did poach and this guy probably was down for hooking up with her.
 

iqqi

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ketostix said:
Another problem besides your game Iqqi, is you have poor choice in guys and friends. I get the sense you were only into this guy because you think he's financially successful and goodlooking. The guy seems like bonehead from the way you explained the situation, and your friend is shady. Your friend did poach and this guy probably was down for hooking up with her.
He isn't financially successful. When I first met him, he had a very low societal position. He isn't doing THAT much better, just a basic J.O.B..

He is good looking, to me. In an old rugged movie star kind of way. A lot of it is his style and demeanor, though. The reason I like him so much is because of some cool things he did that I was witness to.

It always stood out in my mind.
 

iqqi

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joekerr31 said:
EXACTLY.

being overt doesn't mean being a slut. you can be overt and classy at the same time.

what blows my mind is how most men dont know that women think exactly like iqqi does.

if only they know they would slap themselves in the face for being so afraid to approach a woman. or letting such a bewildered creature bust their balls.

women are filled with insecurity and cannot be OVERT in communicating what they want.

they simply fluff up their feathers and hope that its enough to get them what they want.
Ahhh, Joekerr, Joekerr, Joekerr.

I wasn't insecure at all. I WAS nervous, though, I admit, because I really like this dude, and he is a WINNER in my eyes, and he doesn't seem to fawn over women, so I knew I might have to do some work to get his attention.

I DID go over there. Give me credit. Everything was great, why don't you see that. I went over to his group, joined in, and ME and HIM hit it off the whole time.

I didn't NEED to buy him a beer to show him I was interested, or interesting.

THAT was COVERED.

He may be a douchebag. He may have decided to go with the easy kill. If so, good for me. Better to know sooner than later!

By the way, most women are lightyears behind me in terms of interacting with men. I DO have lots of female friends. I am the one they envy. Which may explain why GF was poaching and competing.

The reason I tend to be successful with men, is I understand how much they are like us (thanks to this site!) :flowers:
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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Mr.Positive

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iqqi said:
Talk about overkill!
Well, you did take that chance posting here. :)


In reality, one of two things happened, either he was completely clueless of your attraction/flirtiness (note: his interpretation of everything may be different than what you see).

Or, he took the path of least resistance, your friend.

A lot of guys are like that, will just take what's 'easiest' at the moment.

If that's the case, perhaps you both were looking for something different, and you could do better, IMO.
 

joekerr31

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iqqi said:
Posi, I WENT OVER THERE, lol. How much more OVERT could I be? Don't tell me, don't tell me. I could also have bought him a beer, and a bunch of other things.

Talk about overkill!

believe it or not lots of people approach peopel simply to be friendly.

your doing what AFCs do. you think your 'target' is aware of what your actions mean.

we get guys on here all the time posting conversations they've had with women saying 'so do you think she likes me? do you think she knows i like her? why did she say this? and then why did she say that?"

its pathetic.

and the advice we give them? or at least i give. if she's talkign to you and smiling then ask her out, its the only way you'll know.

if you want to just sit back and hope that someone you get lucky without every having to take a risk, then you'll leave your fate up to luck.
 

MikeYikes122

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In all seriousness though, iqqi, I don't think me or anyone else on here could know what your friend's motivations were. But I can tell you that if girls did this to me I would probably just kind of lose interest like this guy did. If a girl walks away from me for a long amount of time when I'm trying to talk to her, I'd probably just kind of move on to greener pastures.

I don't think that means he has written you off or anything, but no quality male is going to sit there and wait for a girl to return to him.

iqqi said:
Thanks Des, but most real life DJ's will inform you that women do indeed run game, it is just more natural for us.
Ehh girls don't really need game. They just need common sense. A girl with common sense should know that texting a guy repeatedly or calling him every hour is going to scare him off, no matter how hot of a chic she is.
 

iqqi

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joekerr31 said:
believe it or not lots of people approach peopel simply to be friendly.

your doing what AFCs do. you think your 'target' is aware of what your actions mean.

we get guys on here all the time posting conversations they've had with women saying 'so do you think she likes me? do you think she knows i like her? why did she say this? and then why did she say that?"

its pathetic.
I know, Joekerr, but he isn't pathetic, or lame, or AFC. He is about as DJ as they come, IMO.
 

MikeYikes122

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How in the hell is this thread at three pages already? I spaced out watching Conan in the middle of writing my response and somehow there are 53 responses.
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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iqqi

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MikeYikes122 said:
In all seriousness though, iqqi, I don't think me or anyone else on here could know what your friend's motivations were. But I can tell you that if girls did this to me I would probably just kind of lose interest like this guy did. If a girl walks away from me for a long amount of time when I'm trying to talk to her, I'd probably just kind of move on to greener pastures.

I don't think that means he has written you off or anything, but no quality male is going to sit there and wait for a girl to return to him.



Ehh girls don't really need game. They just need common sense. A girl with common sense should know that texting a guy repeatedly or calling him every hour is going to scare him off, no matter how hot of a chic she is.
SO would buying him a damn beer when I don't even know him like that, lol.

And I didn't walk away from him. I left to go get a drink, he didn't have to wait for anything, because it started with me going over to his area, and I came back over there...

Its not like he came to me, and I just left him.

Like I said before, I wasn't going to be clingy and paranoid and stay by his side.
 

ketostix

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MikeYikes122 said:
How in the hell is this thread at three pages already? I spaced out watching Conan in the middle of writing my response and somehow there are 53 responses.

It's basically a chatlog of us trying to give some advice to a hardheaded know-it-all iqqi..
 

iqqi

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MikeYikes122 said:
How in the hell is this thread at three pages already? I spaced out watching Conan in the middle of writing my response and somehow there are 53 responses.
It is very interactive, and I keep replying to everything. :)

It is like a conversation.

Men "buy him a beer, woman!"

Iq "no guys... thats afc!"

Men "come ON do it for US!"

iq "no, guys, i don't think i should have...."

ect. ect.
 

aliasguy

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error


Ha Ha.
 

ketostix

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iqqi said:
SO would buying him a damn beer when I don't even know him like that, lol.

And I didn't walk away from him. I left to go get a drink, he didn't have to wait for anything, because it started with me going over to his area, and I came back over there...

Its not like he came to me, and I just left him.

Like I said before, I wasn't going to be clingy and paranoid and stay by his side.
But had you done what Joekerr suggested (and what you yourself tell guys to do, "buy a drink") and suggested to get a drink with him instead of running off to play your indirect girl game, then old acquantances wouldn't have caught you alone and you probably would've ended up rocking the headboard later with Crush instead of him with your poaching girl friend maybe.
 

“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”

Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.

Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers.  Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.

I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.

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