Had a date 3 days ago - went well, ended up kissing deeply in the bar we outsid afterwards. Texted day after - 1 More text exchange since -Got a text today about how sexually attacted and connected to me she is but is upset I didn’t twxt how are you etc (we’ve had 1 date!) - we’re meeting tomorrow So the 30 hours of silence has good her hamster wheel spinning?
"The Kiss of Death Mistake"
You replay the conversation at 2 a.m. She texted back fast yesterday. Today, nothing. Was that smile friendly or flirty? What did the shoulder touch mean?
Every hour you spend decoding her signals drains your confidence and hands her the controls. Women can sense that insecurity from across the room — and it repels them.
One of the "22 Rules" kills the obsession on the spot: assume she likes you, and act accordingly. Sounds too simple. Works anyway.
Her interest tends to rise to meet your expectations. Psychologists call it a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Requested more contact
- Thread starter Elliot
- Start date
"I just moved here from Florida."
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
CAPSLOCK BANDIT
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This is a very nuanced thing, the kind of setting the pace of how you are going to message her... Like we cant tell you what is gonna work here, cause you wait too long and ur SOL, but too soon desperate, hard thing to call for us, you have all the info.
You set the pace with what you are comfortable with and that pace will craft a expectation, and based on how you are doing with her, she will either try to amend the expectation of you more into her favour with texts like you received or she will just move on.
You gotta retain your pace, dont let her throw you off.
You set the pace with what you are comfortable with and that pace will craft a expectation, and based on how you are doing with her, she will either try to amend the expectation of you more into her favour with texts like you received or she will just move on.
You gotta retain your pace, dont let her throw you off.
ThisIsSparta
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She es allready trying to train and domesticate you. Or maybe this is just the first ****-test?
Either way, i would ignore this comment and reply like : "I really have that feeling too. Looking forward to our meeting!"
If she keeps on banging that, i´d tell her that daily texting after first dates is not mandatory in my life and that my phone is switched on for people that want to reach out to me.
Barrister
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I wouldn't completely ignore. If she is asking for more contact and showing very high interest (and you like her back) I would show a limited amount of increased contact via text. Not a painful "how are you" or "how is your day going." Something light and/or funny before your date though is fine and will help build rapport. Nothing wrong with that at all. This is in instance where if you just ignore her completely you may risk losing her.
Remember the mirroring standard -- if she shows effort, you do the same (assuming you want her of course).
Remember the mirroring standard -- if she shows effort, you do the same (assuming you want her of course).
ThisIsSparta
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Her demanding from him to text her (OR ELSE!) every day after the first date is NOT showing effort from her side. If she texts him and he doesnt reply, thats a different story.
"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
Barrister
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I didn’t read the OP as saying it was a demand to text so much as she wanted more communication. If it is as you say and it was a “demand” to talk then sure.
CAPSLOCK BANDIT
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She is going to pull you as far as she can, soon you'll be having a relationship through her phone... Not your phone, you wont have any control, her phone.
Set boundaries, reinforce them, she will not stop and will seek more and more of your attention, you cannot entertain this at all.
Set boundaries, reinforce them, she will not stop and will seek more and more of your attention, you cannot entertain this at all.
CAPSLOCK BANDIT
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If she wants your attention, she needs to EARN it.
backseatjuan
Banned
Watch out for availability trap, info @yourube
"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"
When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.
Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.
Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.
The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.
EyeBRollin
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This is too much too soon. I’ll give this 3 weeks max before it’s burnt out. Don’t text her anymore and after future dates wait at least 5 days to contact her.