"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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Request for date change

the_m@n

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I had my first date with this girl last weekend and it could not have gone better. I picked her up and we were on our way. There was a lot of flirting, plenty of kino, hand holding and making out. The date ended with a good night kiss and I was off. I called her 3 days later to set up te second date and she agreed almost instantly telling me she couldn't wait to see me again.

Our second date was scheduled for tonight. I had arranged to pick her up take her to dinner and then watch a movie. She called me this afternoon and told me that her boss was keeping her very late at work and that her mother really needed her help so she didn't think she would be able to meet tonight. She immediately followed suggesting that we meet tomorrow night instead following the same plans.

Was I wrong in agreeing to meeting tomorrow? I assume some would suggest that something better came along and she just simply blew me off. I would also assume that some would suggest that I never picked up the phone in the first place. Is this some kind of test or power grab or am I overlooking this? Is it at all possible that she was simply telling the truth?
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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scorpio1138

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she immediately made a counter-offer.

she's interested.

do it.

it's when they don't make a counter offer that you stop contacting them and make them contact you.
 

logic1

Senior Don Juan
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No big deal, go with it.

Use tonight to line up some more options.
 

jophil28

Master Don Juan
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the_m@n said:
Is it at all possible that she was simply telling the truth?
Simple answer- what evidence do you have that she is not ?

The situation that you describe is common in the early stages of getting to know a new woman.. Just go with her change of plans -after all she may be genuine and a great girl. Her actions would not raise an alarm with me.
 

"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"

You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.

She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.

Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.

Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.

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the_m@n

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jophil28 said:
Simple answer- what evidence do you have that she is not ?

The situation that you describe is common in the early stages of getting to know a new woman.. Just go with her change of plans -after all she may be genuine and a great girl. Her actions would not raise an alarm with me.

I think I may be going crazy. I didn't used to think like this. I honestly can't tell you why I would even think she has a reason to lie other than paranoia. Now I feel like I'm in some sort of game and everyone is playing. After reading all the stuff on this site and in the DJ Bible I get the impression that dating is some game of wits and every time I talk to a woman or take her out I am tested on how well I do at it. My problem is I don't ever want to revert back to my old ways.
 

jophil28

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the_m@n said:
I think I may be going crazy. I didn't used to think like this. I honestly can't tell you why I would even think she has a reason to lie other than paranoia. Now I feel like I'm in some sort of game and everyone is playing. After reading all the stuff on this site and in the DJ Bible I get the impression that dating is some game of wits and every time I talk to a woman or take her out I am tested on how well I do at it. My problem is I don't ever want to revert back to my old ways.
Your pendulum has swung too far the other way.

If you read every action by a woman as some sinister "test" you will drive yourself nuts.
There is a fear driven obsession on this site about women "testing" men. It happens about 2% of the times claimed .
I read a lot of misinformed statements by men here who are so 'on alert' that they have lost their spontaneity and their willing to enjoy the 'flow'.

YOu do need to be aware of your surroundings and optimistically cautious about a new women BUT before you next her you need EVIDENCE.

You gut is unreliable in many ways -it will tell you that something is amiss but your BRAIN needs to investigate the fine detail.

If a woman is acting in a courteous way and shows enough interest in you to counteroffer then you are in a good place with her and she with you...so far.

There are no scorpoins under a rock in this relationship with this woman, in fact there is probably no rock.

Good luck.
 

tihash

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The only problem I see is your taking her to "dinner and a movie" before she has put out.
 

the_m@n

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tihash said:
The only problem I see is your taking her to "dinner and a movie" before she has put out.
Is this truely a problem?

I took her to the dinner and a movie and barely watched the movie.
 

DJ SO STEVE

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Never jump to conclusions unless you have facts on the table.

Go with the flow, have a good time then analyze how the dates are going. If a girl always changes plans on you, your gut will tell you that she may not be interested in you. Almost all the time your gut will be telling you the truth.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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