"She's Out of Your League"
You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.
Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.
She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.
Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.
Regaining Frame
- Thread starter highSpeed
- Start date
"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"
When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.
Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.
Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.
The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.
Glassguy
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Its normally best to grab a new bottle of water rather than attempt to sift out the poison from the current one and I will tell you why:
-She will notice the sudden change and you will all of a sudden be a jerk
-She has more than likely been holding the majority of the power in the relationship. Even though she wants you to hold a strong frame, you've lost it which puts her into a lose/lose situation.
-Things are never the same as they once were
-Things are obviously getting bad or you wouldnt have posted this
Maybe give her the "Things really dont feel right and I need to step away from this for a little while. I will catch up with you once I get things figured out" and then ghost her for a few days. A knee jerk reaction from her and you taking a few days to get back into a strong frame mindset is the only thing that could get this back on track for you......and her.
Just my opinion.
see this is the problem that I have with long term relationships. you do this wrong, you get docked this much respect. you do this wrong, you get docked that much respect. it is extremely frustrating, I don't do that to her. If she has a bad day, I chalk it up to a bad day and move on. If I have a bad day, I'm still hearing about it months from now.
And that's the problem I have with long term relationships and marriages, the risk is mostly on the guy. I honestly wish I had realized this before I got married. All the risk is on me. All of the benefit is on her. That in and of itself makes an LTR pretty difficult to maintain. If you're going to stand around waiting for me to do something wrong, let me save you the trouble, I'm going to do something that you perceive as wrong or is actually wrong but either way, you're going to look down on me. So when I am weak, she's going to kick me. When she is weak, I'm going to try and help. Doesn't work. Might as well f*ck em and forget em.
Glassguy
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The risk of LTRs, engagement and marriage is ALL on the man. Given the current failure rate of those relationships in today's market and it's not worth it.
"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"
You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.
She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.
Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.
Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.
