Red flag: When she's a little too "into you" too quick.

sazc

Master Don Juan
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#41
Wow, if you guys REALLY want a heads up on this "red flags" and someone "rushing into a relationship" read the abstract of this article

https://www.ncjrs.gov/App/Publications/abstract.aspx?ID=265178

Insecure versus secure attachment.

This is the kind of intelligence you NEED to have when dating. If she's rushing and love bombing, she might have insecure attachment tendencies. RED FLAG

Hate to say it but, if *YOU* like to rush intimacy, you may also have these issues.

It's all really good information to know and, once you know it, WILL answer all those burning questions as to "why she did that"

Good luck guys
 

XFORCE

Don Juan
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#42
So groming someone is an attachment disorder..... Interesting, I never knew that, I'll have to Google it.

Wow... When you contemplate child sexual offenders, and the fact that they groom, and raise this stems from an attachment disorder, that gives such depth to the how and why. (Not an excuse obvs) but, wow, that's something to contemplate
Google secure, avoidant, anxious and disorganized attachment styles. It really makes you see yourself and people differently (and honestly) when you're aware of which attachment style you have and how to self-improve if it's anything besides secure.
 

XFORCE

Don Juan
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#43
Wow, if you guys REALLY want a heads up on this "red flags" and someone "rushing into a relationship" read the abstract of this article

https://www.ncjrs.gov/App/Publications/abstract.aspx?ID=265178

Insecure versus secure attachment.

This is the kind of intelligence you NEED to have when dating. If she's rushing and love bombing, she might have insecure attachment tendencies. RED FLAG

Hate to say it but, if *YOU* like to rush intimacy, you may also have these issues.

It's all really good information to know and, once you know it, WILL answer all those burning questions as to "why she did that"

Good luck guys
Ah, I see you found it already, kudos. It's CRAZY how accurate this information is.
 
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#44
Good post. The bashing of the ex being a red flag is a big one I have experienced first hand. What she is doing there is setting up some psychological manipulation that she will eventually try and use to exploit your ego and use it to her advantage. It will start out as "My ex is a d|ck, jerk, etc." Then eventually it will shift to ""My ex never put gas in my car when I was short on cash" or "My ex never cleaned my gutters for me". Then if you fall for it your ego is supposed to kick in and start doing the stuff for her that her ex didnt, thus, being "better" than him. DON'T FALL FOR IT.
in hindsight, this is very true!
 

mrgoodstuff

Master Don Juan
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#45
in hindsight, this is very true!
Never compete. So I'm a pretty great guy to my ladies. Some men try to compete and do all this extra stuff that's unnatural for them. I know if you remove me out the equation they'll revert to their normal selfish selves. That's why you shouldn't want someone who competed for you.
 

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devilkingx2

Master Don Juan
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#46
Never compete. So I'm a pretty great guy to my ladies. Some men try to compete and do all this extra stuff that's unnatural for them. I know if you remove me out the equation they'll revert to their normal selfish selves. That's why you shouldn't want someone who competed for you.
but on the other hand. lots of people don't compete out of inability or unwillingness to try, which doesn't matter if you don't want the girl anyway, but it does matter when it comes to girls competing to get you (since you were talking in general with that last statement)

worse than a girl who will go back to her old selfish ways is a girl who doesn't care enough about you to even attempt to woo you or that can't compete with any other random girl on the street
 

mrgoodstuff

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#47
but on the other hand. lots of people don't compete out of inability or unwillingness to try, which doesn't matter if you don't want the girl anyway, but it does matter when it comes to girls competing to get you (since you were talking in general with that last statement)

worse than a girl who will go back to her old selfish ways is a girl who doesn't care enough about you to even attempt to woo you or that can't compete with any other random girl on the street
Yeah it's bad either way. But someone who only rose to the equation because you where in the picture, will revert back to themselves when your out. She shouldn't be doing all this extra just cause someone else likes you. Cause when you remove that, she's going to go back to doing hardly anything. People need to be mindful of what's driving others.
 

mrgoodstuff

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#48
Yeah it's bad either way. But someone who only rose to the equation because you where in the picture, will revert back to themselves when your out. She shouldn't be doing all this extra just cause someone else likes you. Cause when you remove that, she's going to go back to doing hardly anything. People need to be mindful of what's driving others.
Its the same about guys.
 
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