Recovery time

[becker]

Hey, for all you people who have been in failed LTRs, how long has it taken you normally to get over it, and how long has it taken for the girl to get over it?

I'm wondering because this girl I'm seeing just got out of a marriage (married for only 2 months) and she seems to be going through some rough stage where she needs to push people away. Usually this goes away, but I'm wondering if you guys have been through something like this and how long it has taken her to come around.

 

[Grey Fox]

Do not wait on her unless you want to be the "Rebound Guy." Her ability to hold down a healthy relationship is non-exsistant turn your attention else where, or wait a few weeks or months from now to start kicking yourself for waiting on her. You can not put her ahead of you, especially when it effects the direction of where you want to take your life. Move on or regret it.

-Grey Fox

 

[becker]

Grey Fox, you seem to feel pretty strongly about this. Is it not possible to be successful just because of this? What exactly is a rebound anyways? I know generally what it is, but is it ALWAYS the guy that comes after the breakup? There has to be a length of time, which if passed, there is no longer the rebound stage, otherwise everyone would be a rebound unless the person never had a relationship before.

 

[Grey Fox]

Well its pretty much the first guy she tries to get into a "real relationship" after she has fallen off the proverbial horse.

-Grey Fox

 

[becker]

And I'm assuming that the main issue is that she will have a hard time moving on?

 

[NewMan]

And I'm assuming that the main issue is that she will have a hard time moving on?

Not neccessarilly.

It's very rare for any breakup to be "clean". I don't know this situation - but there are probably some phone calls going back and forth. Crying, pleading etc.etc.

Is there a house invovleD?

Kids?

Bills?

Material things to split up.


It's an emotional rollacoaster.

The chances are, she will try and grab onto someone - and that's who the rebound guy is.

This guy will ride the ride with her.

That can include some pretty good fvcking - I had this one girl who broke up form her ex - he told her she wasn't "Wild" enough in bed. She went on a crusade with me to prove him wrong.

It was a great but wild ride.


All I'm saying is - your going to deal with her when she's feeling great (i.e. she's happy she's without him) and when she's feeling bad (i.e. she just found out he's dating someone else).

That's a lot of up's and down's.

It rarely works out.

 

[becker]

Yeah, this girl has issues. I'm sort of moving on, I don't think anything good can come of this.