Recovering after being too direct?

[Plutoman]

Day-game at the coffee club - what's the best way to recover? I still got the number, but there's a definitive lack of comfort built up.

Quick story; ran into a girl, she's a waitress, she was hitting on me. Problem there was that I was with a buddy and an ex-gf. Just ran into her again, at starbucks, where I was studying for an exam - chatted for just a minute, asked for her number as I had to get back to studying. Would've pegged her as a 6 when I first met her, but at starbucks she was a definite 7.5.

She seemed a bit off-put by the number grab, but gave it to me regardless.

What's a good way to recover? I missed on doing the number confirmation there - is it worthwhile to do it tonight, or just wait a few days?

This is not the first time I've been too direct, so both specific and general advice is welcome.

 

[VladPatton]

Eh, text her and see what happens. Ask to meet and when you do, just relax, take it easy and chill with her for a few hrs till you get to see what she's about. I was blatantly direct to this Asian chic once, a neighbor, and it made her so uncomfortable she didn't reply to my 1st (and only) text, and evaded me for a while. I totally knew I phucked it up after she went instant-ghost. I was trying to be super alpha c0ckhead and force her into giving me the number. Shyt didn't work, yo lol

Unfortunately, rushing it way too fast is not good. You gotta create a good, fun, relaxing bond, then get her digits so she associates you with a good time. Nonetheless, you got the number, so ask her for a date (if she'll agree) and see how it goes.

 

[Plutoman]

Think that's the plan here. After being too direct, is it better to wait on the initial contact, or just go for it when convenient? Leaning towards just sitting on it for a few days, run some text game, then tell her I'll be heading to starbucks sunday afternoon and ask her if she's up to joining me.

Many of the situations I end up in, where I meet women I'm interested in, are either high-stress or short on time, both of which result in me being overly direct. What's good ways to build comfort on a short time span (like, <2-3 minutes?).

 

[Plutoman]

Opened today, got a few replies back (long delay on the first, but she's a waitress - the other two replies were quick), haven't heard back since - figures, as I was going to go for a meet-up on the next one.

What's the thoughts on opening a second time, presuming I get nothing back (I don't think I will), with something like, "Hey, why don't we grab some coffee tuesday night? You seemed like an interesting person, and I haven't gotten a genuine chance to talk to you yet."

Not seeing anything to lose for a second try later (not tonight, ofc), so what's a good way to go?

Edit: Okay, ironically, I heard back literally - just - as I was replying to this. So I'll aim for the meet-up and see what goes.

 

[marmel75]

my openers are always something vague and interesting and almost always get a positive response...

my default for a new chick is:

"Finding money in the most interesting places today...how's your morning/afternoon/day going, <name>? Lucky as mine? ---<my name>"

from girslchase.com---works like a charm

He also gives you the proper structure of what a text should contain when texting a female...very, very good info there and it works like magic. I have also found asking the question "So whats your schedule looking like?" is the best method of setting up a date to give yourself the options of when. Almost without fail if the chick is interested she will tell you virtually every day is available with what times...others will tell you they have things going on certain days, but will give you the days they are available. Makes it a lot easier to set things up after trying many different ways...they basically do most of the work for you, all you have to do is give them the day, time and place.

 

[Plutoman]

Thanks. I like that one, definitely. I'll check out the site there, appreciate the note!

I'm good with texting, but I've never done it on the bare minimum of comfort level here before. Typically I've spoken to the girl for at least 10-15 minutes - not the 2-3 minutes in this situation.

 

[Purefilth]

She will reflect you.

If you act cool, like its no big ting, she will too.

if you act awkward, and edgy, because you never closed so quick before, then she will sense this and act awkward and edgy/ nervous.

Fast closes are good, Personally, if I go in and close fast, i get a boost. Makes me feel buzzed, excited - No need to worry.


"OMGWTF!!!! SHE GAVE ME HER NUMBER AFTER 2 MINS CONVERSATION!!! SOMETHINGS WRONG!!!!"

Doesnt matter how fast, you got it. now its set up a date, if she flakes - next.
If she shows - game on, she's at least a bit interested.


Most girls will give at least one date to get a better judgement of you - after all, you could be "THE ONE".
But then you have to give her a good time to get a second date - if you want a second date that is - remember, you should be judging her, and getting marks up to disqualify her. NOT "OMG I'm on a date! I do sure hope she likes me!"




Sorry if this doesnt make sense, just a mind-dump.


Peace.

 

[Plutoman]

I agree with ya there - a fast close gives a bit of a boost, especially if you've not had any approaches lately. It's also easier if she flakes, or isn't interested, there's no investment.

That said, I think the actual success rate is going to be low. I'm getting the feeling as I progress that numbers are easy. Been following some of Roosh's material and finding a lot of it extremely informative. What he's said hits home as far as success vs failure goes. Specifically with regards to day game; I'm not big into night game.