I've been seeing this woman (she's 4 years older than me) for a while now. We've mostly been at the friendship level, but lately I've been sensing she would like more out of it. I want to know how I should proceed in this kind of situation. I really do like her and enjoy the time we spend together, but I just don't want to mess things up.
"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
Realtionship Question
- Thread starter DHertz
- Start date
"I just moved here from Florida."
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
MacAvoy
Banned
DHertz said:I really do like her and enjoy the time we spend together, but I just don't want to mess things up.
If you want to move out of the friends zone, stop acting like you don't want to mess things up. If you put her on a pedastool, she's going to be showing you the door. You have to treat her like you could care less if she was in your life.
Remember you are the catch. She has to earn your time and affection. You need to stop thinking of her as better than all the other girls you've been with. Start treating her like what she is, one fish out of 3,000,000,000.
Oh yea and go read the bible. Finally your not in a relationship. Your not even a blip on the radar yet. Honestly the most help that your going to get from this forum is the bible. I've been here 3 years and the help has come from the knowledge that I've gained from the bible. The situational advice received in posts has been useless compared to what I've learned from the bible.
I'm 25 and she's 29.Latinoman said:How old are you and how old is she?
Thanks for the advice MacAvoy. I haven't put her on a pedestal yet and I won't be doing so anytime soon.
"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"
She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.
Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.
The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.
Kings_royalty
Senior Don Juan
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I've been seeing this woman (she's 4 years older than me) for a while now. We've mostly been at the friendship level, but lately I've been sensing she would like more out of it
So make your move bro. MacAvoy has good advice, I would follow it if i were you.
So make your move bro. MacAvoy has good advice, I would follow it if i were you.
Hitman10000
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- May 29, 2006
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To be honest, if you start hanging out with a girl one on one, there is a short window of opportunity that you can do anything.
Most outgoing girls will give you ONE "meeting" Most ingoing (introverted) girls will give you TWO "meetings" (When I say meetings, I mean hanging out one on one)
If you are rich/handsome +1 meetup. Girls are not acting cruel, YOU ARE especially if she's interested in you. I'm not talking about going on a date with someone at lunch time or studying. I'm talking about a real bonafide...Let's do something and then let's eat something and then let's get it on kinda date.
Before you make your move..I recommend that you "suddenly" become busy for the next 2-3 weeks. Then the next time you meet her, then you make the move. Cause if you make the move after hanging out with her for several weeks without doing something and then you decide on doing something..she thinks you're up to no good. She cannot trust you because you do not trust your own masculinity.
Most outgoing girls will give you ONE "meeting" Most ingoing (introverted) girls will give you TWO "meetings" (When I say meetings, I mean hanging out one on one)
If you are rich/handsome +1 meetup. Girls are not acting cruel, YOU ARE especially if she's interested in you. I'm not talking about going on a date with someone at lunch time or studying. I'm talking about a real bonafide...Let's do something and then let's eat something and then let's get it on kinda date.
Before you make your move..I recommend that you "suddenly" become busy for the next 2-3 weeks. Then the next time you meet her, then you make the move. Cause if you make the move after hanging out with her for several weeks without doing something and then you decide on doing something..she thinks you're up to no good. She cannot trust you because you do not trust your own masculinity.