"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Reading the result of the breakup

Desdinova

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Every time I break up with a woman, there seems to be one of two results:

1) She gets pissed off, tries to eliminate you from her life, and moves on

2) She fights to keep contact with you, even if you don't want it anymore with her

I've been thinking about these two main results and what they indicate about the relationship you had with her. Is situation #1 the result of her trying to use you and not getting her own way? Is situation #2 the result of a woman who genuinely cares and perhaps even secretly feels in love with you?

Thoughts?
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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Bible_Belt

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a woman who genuinely cares and perhaps even secretly feels in love with you?


That's the perfect way to describe an ex. If it's true, then you did everything correctly. Accumulate exes like that over your lifetime, and it will be good for your karma.
 

Scaramouche

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Dear Des,
Why does this matter?
 

Rollo Tomassi

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Don't discourage DES' analysis, it's good introspection and adds to men's collective understanding.

I've stated before that breaking up with a girl is the highest form of DHV for a guy when he's the one initiating it. It's a harsh confirmation for a woman when a guy puts himself out of reach of a woman.
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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Colossus

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It's the same with men.

Actually, it's #2, or the guy is apathetic or even relieved she dumped him so he didnt have to do the dirty work.
 
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