"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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Reading the result of the breakup

Desdinova

Desdinova

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Every time I break up with a woman, there seems to be one of two results:

1) She gets pissed off, tries to eliminate you from her life, and moves on

2) She fights to keep contact with you, even if you don't want it anymore with her

I've been thinking about these two main results and what they indicate about the relationship you had with her. Is situation #1 the result of her trying to use you and not getting her own way? Is situation #2 the result of a woman who genuinely cares and perhaps even secretly feels in love with you?

Thoughts?
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Bible_Belt

Bible_Belt

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a woman who genuinely cares and perhaps even secretly feels in love with you?


That's the perfect way to describe an ex. If it's true, then you did everything correctly. Accumulate exes like that over your lifetime, and it will be good for your karma.
 
S

Scaramouche

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Dear Des,
Why does this matter?
 
Rollo Tomassi

Rollo Tomassi

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Don't discourage DES' analysis, it's good introspection and adds to men's collective understanding.

I've stated before that breaking up with a girl is the highest form of DHV for a guy when he's the one initiating it. It's a harsh confirmation for a woman when a guy puts himself out of reach of a woman.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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Colossus

Colossus

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It's the same with men.

Actually, it's #2, or the guy is apathetic or even relieved she dumped him so he didnt have to do the dirty work.
 
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22 Rules for Massive Success With Women
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