"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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Quitting Smoking for a girl.....display of weakness?

Raoul Duke

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Hi fellow DJs,

Been seeing this girl for a couple of months now and her interest level is very high, although shes told me that my smoking makes me smell and wont kiss me or anything till i have some gum or clean my teeth.

I do actually want to quit smoking and being told that i smell because of it by a girl im very attracted to has increased my desire to quit.

However the thing Im a bit worried about is that i dont want her to think ive quit for her and therefore think she has 'the power'. What do you guys reckon?
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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Lust

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Raoul Duke said:
Hi fellow DJs,

Been seeing this girl for a couple of months now and her interest level is very high, although shes told me that my smoking makes me smell and wont kiss me or anything till i have some gum or clean my teeth.

I do actually want to quit smoking and being told that i smell because of it by a girl im very attracted to has increased my desire to quit.

However the thing Im a bit worried about is that i dont want her to think ive quit for her and therefore think she has 'the power'. What do you guys reckon?
No, its not displaying weakness, if you convey it right.

You are doing it because you have gotten an excuse to get off your ass and actually quit. Thats what you need to convey.

Not, Oh sh!t better do what she says or she'll leave me.
 

MrS

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It's a good excuse for all you weak-willed chumps smoking who "can't quit".
 

Cremasta

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This isn't the forum to preach to you about why you should quit smoking... but why would you rather smoke than get with some HB?

You're looking a better health and regular sex with a girl you like and you're worried about 'the power'?

Why wouldn't you want to let the girl know you've quit for her... let her brag about it, big deal. A girl only has 'power' over you if you let her, if she steps over the line, let her know about it.
 

amoka

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If it is your desire to seize the habit of smoking, just do it. In the process of quiting, don't have her in mind or thinking you're quiting because "she told me to do so". Simply do it for your own good.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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Desdinova

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LOL! I quit smoking for a girl once. I started back up when we split. I look back on it now and I couldn't believe that I actually did this to please a woman. What really makes it rediculous is she married a smoker.

Your intentions are good, but I'm not sure about the motivation behind it. If you're wanting to quit not just because of this girl, but because it's expensive, it makes you smell funny, and it's no good for your health, then by all means work at it.

But if you're doing it solely to make her happy, then don't bother. If your smoking isn't pissing her off, something else about you will.
 

lookyoung

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Listen bro My X LTR of 4 years didn't smoke and I smoked. I wanted to quit so I told her hey listen I want to quit smoking and your going to help me. If I am with you and I want to smoke, don't let me smoke. So whenever we went out when I wanted to light up she would throw a hissy fit. I quit smoking for a long time, and started working out. Now I am just a social smoker.

Listen dude if she wants you to quit than just quit. Hit the gym, I work in the medical field and I see people in there 40's with emphysema. I feel much better now that I am not a habitual smoker.


After you quit smoking you will feel a sense of achievement. There is nothing AFC about being healthy, having white teeth, and smelling better.

BEST OF LUCK:up:
 

Juan_Man

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I wish my dad would quit smoking for my mom.
 

[S]alvatore

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Quit for yourself not for a girl.
WTF is up with guys joining the gym for a girl, quitting "so and so " for a girl. Do sh!t for yourself, not others. And this applies for all people not just girls, you do things in this world for yourself not to please other people.
 

The Forms

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It's a good excuse for all you weak-willed chumps smoking who "can't quit".
Spoken with the authority only an 18 year old can possess.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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Charm

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Why does it matter who you quit for if its going to hugely impact your health in a positive way?
 

Scorched

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I know a guy who started smoking twice because he'd be dating a girl who smokes.

I like lookyoung's idea about "I'm going to quit, I might need your help." You might want to come up with logical reasons why, so she doesn't think it is for her. Hell join a gym and then say, "I had to stop smoking for the gym." IF SHE ASKS. ha...

I seriously wouldn't stress about her opinion though.

Good Luck
 

Mental

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Raoul Duke said:
Hi fellow DJs,

Been seeing this girl for a couple of months now and her interest level is very high, although shes told me that my smoking makes me smell and wont kiss me or anything till i have some gum or clean my teeth.

I do actually want to quit smoking and being told that i smell because of it by a girl im very attracted to has increased my desire to quit.

However the thing Im a bit worried about is that i dont want her to think ive quit for her and therefore think she has 'the power'. What do you guys reckon?
Quit smoking for yourself. Quitting smoking for a woman is a BAD idea; you'll be more likely to go back once she's gone. Do it for yourself.

Do it because if you smoke a pack in a week you've lost (at the least) roughly $110.00 a year. With more expensive brands, you're spending at least $200.00 to $250.00 a year.

If you smoke only a pack a day, thats anywhere from $700.00 to $2,000 a year, not counting Uncle Sam's share with taxes.

If you can't stop smoking for your own health (the best reason I can think of), then do it for the money you'll save. Do it for the fact that you will stink less (yes, that might get you a woman). How much better your clothes will smell.
 

Latinoman

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Raoul Duke said:
Hi fellow DJs,

Been seeing this girl for a couple of months now and her interest level is very high, although shes told me that my smoking makes me smell and wont kiss me or anything till i have some gum or clean my teeth.

I do actually want to quit smoking and being told that i smell because of it by a girl im very attracted to has increased my desire to quit.

However the thing Im a bit worried about is that i dont want her to think ive quit for her and therefore think she has 'the power'. What do you guys reckon?

If you are doing something that is going to make YOUR health/fitness/intellect/etc. better...then, does it matter if you are doing it for a girl? After all...YOU are the winner!
 

The Forms

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I'm quitting right now, so I started tallying the money up too.

I've been spending about 100 dollars, give or take, a month on cigarettes. Over the course of a month that's not too much money, but if I put 3 bucks a day in a jar, at the end of the year I could probably buy something really cool

The real question here is do the ends justify the means. Is it sufficient that you quit smoking, or is it only good so long as you do it for the right reasons.

I don't think the ends wholly justify the means. Mainly for reasons stated already; if you just quit for her, you'll probably start when you break up.

I would make sure that I was quitting because of the health benefits primarily. But there's no shame in letting her know that her urging gave you that last little "bump" you needed to cross over into the realm of non-smokers. I know I would personally let her know that she had some influence, but in the end I did it because I wanted to.

But you do what you want
 

"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"

You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.

She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.

Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.

Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.

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Charm

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Intentions mean nothing. Actions are what count. Quitting smoking sends a message to your body and mind on many levels that your health is important and that translates immediately into neurological changes that will improve your attitude and state of mind.
 

faisal

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This is indeed a display of weakness. Go blow smoke in that girls face.
 

KarmaSutra

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faisal said:
This is indeed a display of weakness. Go blow smoke in that girls face.
This is childish. I am an avid cigar smoker and I have made my intentions quite clear that I will not quit smoking cigars but I am respectful of thier space. If she chooses not to partake in my smoking pleasure I do it in comfort away from her. But smoke I will.

Also, I've yet to meet a woman who isn't willing to smoke a good premium cigar and enjoy the experience thoroughly once I've taught them about the nuances of them.
 

faisal

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KarmaSutra said:
This is childish. I am an avid cigar smoker and I have made my intentions quite clear that I will not quit smoking cigars but I am respectful of thier space. If she chooses not to partake in my smoking pleasure I do it in comfort away from her. But smoke I will.

Also, I've yet to meet a woman who isn't willing to smoke a good premium cigar and enjoy the experience thoroughly once I've taught them about the nuances of them.
Try weed. It's way better.
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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