"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
Quitting cigarettes
- Thread starter cola
- Start date
"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
Bible_Belt
Master Don Juan
http://www.cigarettespedia.com/images/e/ee/Dutch_treats_little_cigars_menthol_l_20_s_usa.jpg
I never got through the first pack.
3countriesPlan
Master Don Juan
Colossus
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Jan 22, 2005
- Messages
- 3,494
- Reaction score
- 543
I used to smoke when i was a teenager. Havent touched a cigarette in over 10 years. To this day I HATE cigarettes. I hate the smell, I hate the way people smoke them in public and blow that carcinogenic smog in everyone's faces. I think we should start treating smokers like the second-class citizens that they are, and ban it in ALL public places.
Sorry if that was harsh, cola. There are no secrets. My tips? Dont buy them. Dont hang out with people who smoke. Dont put yourself in situations where you are likely to smoke. Replace that habit with the gym.
"I just moved here from Florida."
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
I won't date a girl that smokes. If I make out with a random girl and I can taste cigarettes, goodbye.
I have had a couple friends successfully quit smoking, and they were all the kind of people that I would expect to have the strength to. Then I see my lazy friends with no real jobs, some still living at their parents, and they "have no desire to even try to quit". Disgusts me.
The only "trick" I have come across working for people is fighting hard to do it. I can't speak from experience, but seeing people that want to quit being able to quit makes me feel like people claim it is harder than it really is. I am in no way saying it isn't hard, but everyone I see that actually wants to quit, does it successfully.
Just commit to it. Stop buying them immediately and deal with the withdrawal. Keep telling yourself it will get easier and it's worth it. It will be, without a doubt, one of the best decisions you ever make in your life. If only we could be so sure about our other decisions working out so well. That should be enough motivation.