Quick Date Question - Time Sensitive

[CaConfused]

I go out with a girl Tues night. We make out a lot. GREAT night.

We talk about running, and so I tell her we should run some trails at my place on Saturday. She's totally into it.

She texts me good night Tues night.

I text her last night with something funny. She responds an hour later that she's just going out for a run. Then I say "You better, so you can keep up with me. Meet at my place Saturday 11:30?"

It shows read receipt last night at 7p. No response.

What do I do? Did I screw up?

 

[NewAndImproved]

delete

 

[CaConfused]

Excuse me?

 

[NewAndImproved]

LOL, my fault I had a response up there but I realized I misread what you wrote.

Curious about that "something funny" that you texted her and what her reply was. Was it strictly a business-like text "I'm going running" or was she still flirty?

I like your reply but probably wouldn't have gone for the meetup right there. Depending on how she responded to "you better so you can keep up with me..." then I'd go for it.

 

[CaConfused]

LOL, my fault I had a response up there but I realized I misread what you wrote.

Curious about that "something funny" that you texted her and what her reply was. Was it strictly a business-like text "I'm going running" or was she still flirty?

I like your reply but probably wouldn't have gone for the meetup right there. Depending on how she responded to "you better so you can keep up with me..." then I'd go for it.

I figured it was in the bag since we already agreed on running on Saturday

She replied to my initial funny text with a smiley and a laugh. It was still flirty. Then I went for the confirmation (with the you better..")

Thanks. This sucks because everything was going very very well until this weird point. And the prior agreed date was Sat early afternoon so I feel pressure to figure this out...

 

[The Gambler]

Well, since today is Friday, I would shoot her a quick text like "Hey you... still in a running mood?" Then wait for her to respond. Period. If she never responds back, you never speak to her again.

Women are sometimes in an awkward position where they like you, but have other things going on and other guys going for them all at the same time. They're really not sure how to handle it. So make it easy for the both of you... Shoot her that text and let her make her decision. No response back to you would be a very clear decision!!!

Good luck my friend!

 

[CaConfused]

I sent the unanswered text at 7:34. It has a read reciept. Should I send another one so soon?

 

[The Gambler]

I sent the unanswered text at 7:34. It has a read reciept. Should I send another one so soon?

Maybe wait until this evening. I think that's a reasonable time-frame, and something any normal person would do. There's even a chance she may respond before that, but who knows. I don't think you've done anything to look foolish or desperate... You've handled this very well.

 

[NewAndImproved]

I figured it was in the bag since we already agreed on running on Saturday

She replied to my initial funny text with a smiley and a laugh. It was still flirty. Then I went for the confirmation (with the you better..")

Thanks. This sucks because everything was going very very well until this weird point. And the prior agreed date was Sat early afternoon so I feel pressure to figure this out...

Who knows what's going on.

All I know is that if I make plans with a girl more than 5 days in advance, I don't have the expectation of her showing. Hell, if I make plans with a girl 1 hour in advance -- I still know she can flake!

Dudes can make plans months and even a year in advance and you're confident that it's going to happen. Not so much with women. At the time she appears to have been feeling you -- lots of make outs, talking about future plans together -- but that doesn't mean that now a few days later, she still feels the same way.

I'd go with what Gambler says. Play it cool and if you don't get a response, text this evening and leave it at that.

 

[dap]

I personally wouldn't send anymore texts until she responds. She read the last text, so another is pointless and makes u look needy. In fact, I would go NC until she reinitiates. She probably will reinitiate (she seems to have high IL otherwise) but if she doesn't than you can move on.

No matter what, go running on Sat with or without her.

 

[CaConfused]

All great insights. Interesting to see so many takes. I really appreciate this input.

I am leaning towards no contact. If I break down and text her, it will be around 6pm. Maybe she met someone new between Tuesday and now (Friday).

I guess whatever the outcome, I can live with it, since I didn't screw up and I seem to be learning a lot.

 

[CaConfused]

We both are avid runners. Maybe it wasnt the best idea, but it came up really organically.

 

[CaConfused]

Guys I just got struck with inspiration -- you guys made me think.. what would give her an 'out' from physical activity while offering up something cool

What if I sent another text

"If you're worried about embarassing me with your awesome running speed, lets just go for a nice hike and get dinner instead. (Funny, gives her a physical out.)

OR

"are we moving too fast, lol. lets slow it down with a hike and get dinner instead" (Word play, physical out)

What do you guys think?

 

[NewAndImproved]

"are we moving too fast, lol. lets slow it down with a hike and get dinner instead" (Word play, physical out)

Hmmm...

I get what you're trying to do & like it.

However the problem with both is that it comes across like you're affected by her non-response (you are) and have been stewing over why she didn't respond (you have been!).

If you do send something like this wait until at least this evening. And make it more of your idea with a bit of ****y funny: "Something's come up in the AM. Don't want to run circles around you anyway. ; ) Let's slow it down and do an afternoon hike and drinks."

 

[CaConfused]

Nice one. Like how you improved it! Why would you wait until evening? Would it seem more legit that something came up if I sent it sooner (next hour) than later (6pm..)? Because later would kinda seem like its obvious she isn't coming in the AM?

It's now 11:27 am. She read my text 7:30 last night. Seems obvious she ain't gonna go.


Hmmm - btw before our first meeting she sent this "Good morning. Just confirming I will see you tonight at 8? Hope you are having a good day "

 

[CaConfused]

11:30am is when I invited her out.

Well I said "1130a, my place Sat?" . I hope that was clear, AM.

She sent me two texts in a row prior to that ASK. That's what bewilders me. Now I'm thinking maybe she didn't see the A?" UGH

 

[VladPatton]

I personally wouldn't send anymore texts until she responds. She read the last text, so another is pointless and makes u look needy. In fact, I would go NC until she reinitiates. She probably will reinitiate (she seems to have high IL otherwise) but if she doesn't than you can move on.

No matter what, go running on Sat with or without her.

I agree with dap, this is what I would do. I am starting to agree more and more that texts should be at a minimum without any elaborate funny/witty/clever things going on. Let us know what happens.

Good luck.

 

[ARrocket]

Why would you invite her to go running with you? She will either have to keep up, or more likely you will have to slow down. Plus you're doing a physical, non-competitive date that has no end result except...to be exhausted. I can see this kind of thing going well for people who are continuously seeing each other and have good rapport, but not for people just getting to know each other.

Instead try offering a hike. Or a walk in the park after some coffee. Rock climbing is even not half bad. Bike ride maybe.

THIS.

You made out with her, and now you want her to be outside with you, out of breath, and sweaty? Why don't you just invite her over to your place, so you can make her out of breath and sweaty in the bedroom instead

Send NewAndImproved's text.

 

[Plutoman]

If a girl's being disrespectful like that, I would just not contact her at all. If she doesn't give an explanation, I probably wouldn't bother continuing much unless she makes the attempt herself.

I think I'm just getting tired of dealing with low IL girls though.

For you specifically if you want to go out again, I would just wait and see if she says anything, specifically an apology. If she doesn't, ping her on Sunday or so, start a small conversation (as in, 2-3 texts) to gauge her interest, and then jump for a meet-up if you think the interest is there.

 

[CaConfused]

If a girl's being disrespectful like that, I would just not contact her at all. If she doesn't give an explanation, I probably wouldn't bother continuing much unless she makes the attempt herself.

I think I'm just getting tired of dealing with low IL girls though.

For you specifically if you want to go out again, I would just wait and see if she says anything, specifically an apology. If she doesn't, ping her on Sunday or so, start a small conversation (as in, 2-3 texts) to gauge her interest, and then jump for a meet-up if you think the interest is there.

It was sharply divided on this board, but I texted this;

1:10p - me to her "Something came in AM. Don't want to run circles around you anyway. lets slow it down and do afternoon hike and sushi."

5:54 here to me "Hey sorry left my phone at my sister's house and just got it back. Sat afternoon is perfect!"

BOOYAH!