"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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Quality girl, but unexpected flake. Advise pls =)

DjVelvet

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I know a girl in a fashion forum, and we have meet up for 2 quick lunch dates lasting an hour each. We chat averagely in MSN and the conversations are getting better and better, she's opening up and I can sense increasing interest from her (but as we all know, true interest has to be made on an actual date). We made plans to go travelling June this year to get some fashion stuffs. She was enthu towards it.

We made another plan for a dinner last Friday. She was very enthuistic about it and agrees immediately.

Expect the unexpected, an hr before the date, she txt me saying she cannot make it as she needs to accompany mom to aunt's place, but stated she will definitely give me another nice dinner treat. I only reply "ok". Her flake... I wonder if its Bull**** or what because she seems interested initially.

We are both busy and didn't get to talk to one another since last Friday. I'm interested to get her out again. However, I feel it’s a bit odd to reinitiate another meeting up, a part of me just wants to let her initiate everything (which may not happen at all, lol).

Maybe her interest level isn't high enough in the first place, what a waste, she's a nice girl. Any advices whether I should contact? Or wait?

I'm seeing other girls too, but by far, this girl i'm mentioning is a quality girl as compared to the others i'm seeing.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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Nighthawk

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Sounds like you've hidden your sexuality because she's a 'nice girl' and her interest levels have dropped. Describe how you have been gaming this babe up to now, and how often you have been relegated to the friendzone in the past .
 

DjVelvet

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Actually i know her for quite some time, say 3 months ago.

Its until recent 3 weeks I just IM her casually to chat and she's the sort that don't really talk much. But I keep ploughing and manage to get her opening up herself. I tease her relatively.

As for sexuality, I guess not much.. Partially we are both asians, more conversative towards sexuality, or how do i put it. the comfort is still not established enough yet.
 

ryannath

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You are a guy and were in a fashion forum? I don't know any guys into fashion like that, that aren't gay. She thinks you're gay I bet.
 

neko

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Not all Asians are conservative about sex. Trust me, I've known many that are very open about it. Don't limit yourself with generalizations.
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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DJMaC23

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You are a guy and were in a fashion forum? I don't know any guys into fashion like that, that aren't gay. She thinks you're gay I bet.

I was going to retort with a smart remark, but then I noticed where in the U.S. you are located...

I'd say give it a go again in a couple days..ask her when she is going to feed u that dinner she promised...and yea you need to be a little more sexual...just don't lay it all on her at once, gradually is the way to go, kino kino kino! Don't just talk about fashion with her, she has her girlfriends and gay friends for that, talk about other things as well
 

Desdinova

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For stuff like this, I go by the "three strikes your out" policy. It's possible that her first excuse is genuine (and hey, she counter-offered). A second excuse could be genuine, but it could be bull5hit. If she dumps out a third time, it's definately time to drop her.
 

Latinoman

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Desdinova said:
For stuff like this, I go by the "three strikes your out" policy. It's possible that her first excuse is genuine (and hey, she counter-offered). A second excuse could be genuine, but it could be bull5hit. If she dumps out a third time, it's definately time to drop her.
I agree.
 

djbr

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Desdinova gave great advice. Still, I will throw my two cents.

DjVelvet said:
I know a girl in a fashion forum, and we have meet up for 2 quick lunch dates lasting an hour each. We chat averagely in MSN and the conversations are getting better and better, she's opening up and I can sense increasing interest from her (but as we all know, true interest has to be made on an actual date). We made plans to go travelling June this year to get some fashion stuffs. She was enthu towards it.

We made another plan for a dinner last Friday. She was very enthuistic about it and agrees immediately.

Expect the unexpected, an hr before the date, she txt me saying she cannot make it as she needs to accompany mom to aunt's place, but stated she will definitely give me another nice dinner treat. I only reply "ok". Her flake... I wonder if its Bull**** or what because she seems interested initially.
Well, let her contact you. It's tough but better than be made a fool of. You have to watch what they DO, not what they SAY.

Just yesterday I had this girl saying she liked me soooo much and thought I was a great guy, and had this HUGE fear of letting me go. She CRIED! And she is the girl you would say it's a "nice girl". Still, she would not make out with me. Of course I bailed... damn, putting me onto her STOCK? :nono:

You go after it. If things do not go the way you want them to go, you bail. No need to get anxious, there are plenty of women all around the world.

They are doing what their conditions permit. If they can get away with murder, then so be it. That's why you go for high interest. You're better off going for 100 women and having two who will appreciate your advances than concentrating on a small number and getting stuck on small stuff like this.

DjVelvet said:
We are both busy and didn't get to talk to one another since last Friday. I'm interested to get her out again. However, I feel it’s a bit odd to reinitiate another meeting up, a part of me just wants to let her initiate everything (which may not happen at all, lol).
But at least you know what you want to if she did not pursue you. She knows what you want. If she knows what she wants (and that happens to be you) your phone will ring. She has your number right?

DjVelvet said:
Maybe her interest level isn't high enough in the first place, what a waste, she's a nice girl. Any advices whether I should contact? Or wait?
No she is not. I made a thread about this a looooooong time ago. I've seen more than my share of "nice girls" going WILD (capital letters dammit!) when a guy who turns 'em on shows up.

DjVelvet said:
I'm seeing other girls too, but by far, this girl i'm mentioning is a quality girl as compared to the others i'm seeing.
Read above.

They're mostly the same, and you are making a HUGE mistake by qualifying her BEFORE she qualifies herself to you. Also, are you getting rid of DA COMPETITION? Bad move! :down:

Why are you denying her the joy of battling against other women?
 
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