"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Proper way to leave a voicemail?

coacj

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My thing if you want to be a (PLAYER), then dont leave a voicemail & be mysterious because players dont reveal anything.

If you are not trying to be a (PLAYER) and you dont want to waste anytime then let her know your intenstions by a voicemail or text.

But i think a voicemail might be better because a woman wants to hear your voice and see where your coming from. A text might tell her that your shy.

If you do want to leave a voicemail and your nervous i think you should rehearse what your are going to say so that you dont sound like a nervouse stuttering fool.
 

"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"

You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.

She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.

Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.

Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.

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Francisco d'Anconia

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coacj said:
My thing if you want to be a (PLAYER), then dont leave a voicemail & be mysterious because players dont reveal anything....
To be a player it helps to have women wanting to hang out with you. That's a bit difficult to achieve if you don't tell them anything.
 

coacj

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No i agree you should leave a message because if you dont leave the message some women will think they are chasing the guy so they wont call back just to keep there wall from being destroyed. some women like the player mentality in a guy and there are some girls who dont, every girl is different.
 

tsmith2334

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coacj said:
But i think a voicemail might be better because a woman wants to hear your voice and see where your coming from. A text might tell her that your shy.

If you do want to leave a voicemail and your nervous i think you should rehearse what your are going to say so that you dont sound like a nervouse stuttering fool.
Man, this thread is pulling me in different directions. I agree with a woman wanting to hear your voice, and I also think leaving the right voicemail could help you come across as confident. But like Francisco said, playing phone tag isn't very attractive either.

I think I might go for a text in this case, even though I don't want to. Based on this particular female, I think texts have had the best success rate in the past. Plus, she'll probably reply either way, unlike having to wait if she was rude and decided to not call back.
 

coacj

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in the end its what technique works best for you, if voicmalls work fr you keep it, if texting is going well then dont stop, keep going with that technique
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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Kev07

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text messaging is for the win, learn how to flirt using texts

simple rule: the objective of your text is to get her to smile when she reads it.


If shes the type of girl that never picks up her phone, it's much better to not leave a voicemail


I usually leave a voicemail if it's a girl who i've just met/getting to know, not so much when I've already been dating her.

If i'm already dating her I'll call, if theres no pick up then I might leave a text message.
 

CuZzT

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What if a girl gives you a bunch of IOIs; you # close; text her - make her laugh; she replies; and then you tell her you want to see her again and she doesn't reply?

Move on? Send her another text? What do you say in that text? In my situation I sent that text really late so it's possible she hasn't seen it, but it's been over a week.

What kind of text would you send in that situation?
 

CuZzT

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Kev07 said:
Treat it like you never sent that text and just call her
Even if you have never talked with the girl on the phone before?
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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CuZzT

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Kev07 said:
why not

though a week later she probably won't remember who you are
It was a classroom # close; so I think she will, lol.
 

tsmith2334

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CuZzT said:
What if a girl gives you a bunch of IOIs; you # close; text her - make her laugh; she replies; and then you tell her you want to see her again and she doesn't reply?

Move on? Send her another text? What do you say in that text? In my situation I sent that text really late so it's possible she hasn't seen it, but it's been over a week.

What kind of text would you send in that situation?
She seems not interested (maybe you came on too strong, too soon) but it's also possible she didn't get the text or she's playing hard to get. You could move on, a lot of people on this site would be quick to shout "next!". But I see no harm in texting her again.

I could see how calling might be awkard since you've never talked to her on the phone before, so go with a text. If you're really feeling confident, a call might work out nicely. Either way, it couldn't hurt to try her again. I would, atleast.
 

CuZzT

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tsmith2334 said:
She seems not interested (maybe you came on too strong, too soon) but it's also possible she didn't get the text or she's playing hard to get. You could move on, a lot of people on this site would be quick to shout "next!". But I see no harm in texting her again.

I could see how calling might be awkard since you've never talked to her on the phone before, so go with a text. If you're really feeling confident, a call might work out nicely. Either way, it couldn't hurt to try her again. I would, atleast.
Yeah, I'm not sure with this girl. I would probably rather text - but I don't know what to say? Any ideas?
 

Francisco d'Anconia

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Didn't Rollo post a thread about guys using technology as a buffer for rejection? :whistle:
 

tsmith2334

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Francisco d'Anconia said:
Didn't Rollo post a thread about guys using technology as a buffer for rejection? :whistle:
I'm sure in some instances it is, but like muscleman said, it is 2008. Some people, including attractive females, prefer texting when making plans. Just the way of the world I guess. I think it lacks a personal feel, so I try to avoid it, but I guess in some cases it makes sense.
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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Francisco d'Anconia

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tsmith2334 said:
I'm sure in some instances it is, but like muscleman said, it is 2008. Some people, including attractive females, prefer texting when making plans. Just the way of the world I guess. I think it lacks a personal feel, so I try to avoid it, but I guess in some cases it makes sense.
Even though it's 2008, this isn't the 1990's when there were just digital pagers to send text messages back and forth. People are buying phones to send primarily text messages back and forth. It just seems a bit silly.
 

tsmith2334

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Francisco d'Anconia said:
Even though it's 2008, this isn't the 1990's when there were just digital pagers to send text messages back and forth. People are buying phones to send primarily text messages back and forth. It just seems a bit silly.
Ah I agree completely. If you check my original post, I say texting (even leaving a voicemail) is a last resort. I don't like it nor do I really trust it.

What I think is really wierd is when I make plans with a female (in person, over the phone, whatever), and she confirms or sets up details with a text.

Could this possibly be a sign of nervousnes, an IOI or sign of disinterest? In other words, plan are set, things are about to be in motion, but she doesn't feel comfortable picking up the phone for whatever reason. I wouldn't think it means anything, but you never know.
 

Francisco d'Anconia

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tsmith2334 said:
...Could this possibly be a sign of nervousnes, an IOI or sign of disinterest? In other words, plan are set, things are about to be in motion, but she doesn't feel comfortable picking up the phone for whatever reason. I wouldn't think it means anything, but you never know.
I think you have a point about the nervousness thing in that people seem so uneasy with having conversations with people they don't know. People would rather spend a couple of minutes typing an email or sending a text and waiting for an answer instead of just calling the person, asking a question getting an answer and hanging up. I think it could be done in 15-20 seconds. Are we too busy for that but we will play text-tag with each other for several minutes out of the day?
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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