Serg897
Master Don Juan
Hey all,
I've been having some thoughts lately I want to discuss.
A few months ago I went through a very painful experience breaking up with a girlfriend. I had become attached, and when we got into a fight and she said she wanted to separate, I did every single thing wrong you could possibly do. I called. I sent emails. I told her I would change, asking for another chance.
Needless to say, this drove her away from me at the speed of light, and straight into the arms of another man a few weeks later, who undoubtedly was warming up in the bullpen as all this **** was going down.
This led to WEEKS of heartache and borderline depression, but also a lot of soul searching. I even picked up meditation to try to control my emotional state and deal with this constructively. I ask myself: why didn't I know better? I've been a member of this forum for YEARS. The answer seems to be that these actions made sense to me at the time. In the moment. I didnt have the forsight or the wisdom.
This isn't even the first time I have done something like this! There was an enormous thread last year started by me about another girl who I was seeing, with a very similar outcome. To be fair to myself, she was a first in a lot of things, and a completely new/different experience - but the essence of the story is typical, and I feel like I should have known better. Part of me DID know better, but in the moment it is very difficult to ignore your emotions.
I've come to the conclusion that I seem to be wired to be an AFC, and that to stop myself I have to actively control my emotional state and do things that seem counterintuitive. I come to this forum for help all the time, despite how long I've been here. You would think that natural selection would have wiped out men like me from the earth a long time ago, but here I am.
How many of you have had a similar experience? Does DJism come naturally to some of you? Or does the road to the DJ mindset always involve multiple heartbreaks?
I've been having some thoughts lately I want to discuss.
A few months ago I went through a very painful experience breaking up with a girlfriend. I had become attached, and when we got into a fight and she said she wanted to separate, I did every single thing wrong you could possibly do. I called. I sent emails. I told her I would change, asking for another chance.
Needless to say, this drove her away from me at the speed of light, and straight into the arms of another man a few weeks later, who undoubtedly was warming up in the bullpen as all this **** was going down.
This led to WEEKS of heartache and borderline depression, but also a lot of soul searching. I even picked up meditation to try to control my emotional state and deal with this constructively. I ask myself: why didn't I know better? I've been a member of this forum for YEARS. The answer seems to be that these actions made sense to me at the time. In the moment. I didnt have the forsight or the wisdom.
This isn't even the first time I have done something like this! There was an enormous thread last year started by me about another girl who I was seeing, with a very similar outcome. To be fair to myself, she was a first in a lot of things, and a completely new/different experience - but the essence of the story is typical, and I feel like I should have known better. Part of me DID know better, but in the moment it is very difficult to ignore your emotions.
I've come to the conclusion that I seem to be wired to be an AFC, and that to stop myself I have to actively control my emotional state and do things that seem counterintuitive. I come to this forum for help all the time, despite how long I've been here. You would think that natural selection would have wiped out men like me from the earth a long time ago, but here I am.
How many of you have had a similar experience? Does DJism come naturally to some of you? Or does the road to the DJ mindset always involve multiple heartbreaks?