"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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Procrastinating

Gammergq

Don Juan
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I always feel that I am not ready to approach and that I have to learn somwthing more what should I do to combat this problem?
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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AmazingTricks

Don Juan
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You'll learn [much] more by approaching.
 

DavenJuan

Master Don Juan
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Mar 22, 2003
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mistake by the lake
Gammergq said:
I always feel that I am not ready to approach and that I have to learn somwthing more what should I do to combat this problem?
couple things to remember when you start feeling like this..

1. we ALL felt like that at some point or atleast most of us

2. there is ALWAYS something more to learn and get better in your game

3. the most IMPORTANT THING to remember is you ONLY get better with practice. dont put so much pressure on yourself. look at it as a numbers game. the more ppl you approach and the more ppl that turn you DOWN, the closer you are to accomplishing whatever it is you want to get out of the approach.

for me, i would ENJOY the no's sometimes. it gave me practice, something for me to get better at.

have fun, dont THINK, and just do it.

and by all means... DONT TAKE IT PERSONAL
 

MacAvoy

Banned
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We have the perfect solution for you. Its designed to get newby's comfortable with approaching and dating. It starts off small with just making eye contact and slowly escalating after that.

Its called Don Juan Boot Camp. Its the 4th option on the list, you can either view it as a PDF or a Word file.

Good luck and start reading the bible (3rd from the bottom) while your at it.
 

Francisco d'Anconia

Master Don Juan
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Galt's Gulch
Gammergq said:
I always feel that I am not ready to approach and that I have to learn somwthing more what should I do to combat this problem?
Realize that it's not the lack of information that's holding you back, you'll never know everything. You need to learn how to feel confident that you will survive if you're not 100% successful.
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

Read more...

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