"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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(probably final) Update on LTR

TesuqueRed

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I can agree with both iq and InLaws about their respective points. I've seen that deep down need for women to feel that you could protect them--even, without fail, from the toughest ball-breaking women I've met who never had need for someone to protect them (they could and would pull that trigger on thier own, thank you very much...)

And, like InLaws, I resented that burden that was placed on me in the past. Maybe he'll take issue with me interpreting "resentment' coming from his post, but that's the feeling I struggled with for so long with exactly those thoughts he used in his post.

Now--I dunno--it doesn't bother me anymore. I don't recall ever specifically addressing it (happened sometime after a year here), but I got over it. You be yourself (you know what I mean--"be a man" type of be yourself) and you can handle what comes your way, and she knows that--and can feel like you can "protect" her, which really means that you handle yourself.

An AFC can't handle himself, let alone her, let alone what comes his way...

To both iqqi and InLaws, I would say "yes."
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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TesuqueRed

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Getting side tracked here, but running along an extreme case of what InLaws kinda points out, I even ran into a girl or two (I won't call these specific cases 'women') who would set up a situation where there would be conflict between you and some other guy--a conflict over her--just to see if you would step in and protect her. You could feel the game set-up and manipulation! It's a real fvcked up test, IMO--which, I think Transactional Analysis would label as the "how about you and him fight" game.

Needless to say, they got next'd 15 seconds into the test (game). That shyt I never did get over.
 

KarmaSutra

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MetalFortress said:
Bump, to show those who did not see it years ago, that no matter how much outer game you build, it doesn't matter if you're not truly working on becoming a better person. The outer game will crumble away and reveal what's inside.

Well played sir. :up:
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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