"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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Proactive Approach to Potential Drama

logicallefty

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Tried this new proactive tactic and it seems to have worked like I wanted.

This HB I am seeing texts me last night

HB: "You won't believe this. I am the founder of a Facebook group and your ex GF NAME just signed up and posted some stuff. Looks like she and I have a mutual friend FRIEND NAME"

My thoughts were "oh boy, here comes the drama-train".

Lefty: "Wow small world. FRIEND NAME is her boss. Thanks for the info. Just to let you know I don't associate to more than an acquaintance level with anyone who also associates with her (my ex) ."

HB: "What is that supposed to mean?"

Lefty: "It means exactly what it says"

HB: "So are you saying I can't talk to her?"

Lefty: "No. I am saying if you do talk to her then I can't be anymore than your acquaintance"

HB: "I can't believe you would accuse me of talking to her! You don't trust me! I thought you trusted me! Good night!!"

Lefty: "Night"

She called, texted, and Emailed me 1x each within the next hour.

Emailed again this morning apologizing for being a "typical female" and getting b|tchy! She asked me if I wanted her to leave the FB group and turn it over to someone else. I said "you don't HAVE to do anything, you are a free woman"

All is well. Now. She said she can't wait to b@ng my brains out this weekend!
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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Sik

Don Juan
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Well played, Logicallefty!

I hope no one misses the beauty of the exchange. No drama, fighting, yelling or other negative behavior. Just you stating your rules, maintaining frame and her following your lead.

A relatively small victory, but it lays the foundation for all future interactions.
 

logicallefty

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Sik said:
Well played, Logicallefty!

I hope no one misses the beauty of the exchange. No drama, fighting, yelling or other negative behavior. Just you stating your rules, maintaining frame and her following your lead.

A relatively small victory, but it lays the foundation for all future interactions.
Thank you Sir. We have had a lot of talks on here lately about establishing, keeping, and reestablishing frame. So I figured it was good timing to post this.
 
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