You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.
Oh thanks for the vote of confidence... :woo:Bvbidd said:... She'll probally even flake on ya.
Yeah. Real nice help there, BvbiddFrancisco d'Anconia said:Oh thanks for the vote of confidence... :woo:
I just had a strange epiphany (alright, it was just a brain-fart) about phone calls and coffee dates, to me it seems that a phone call to someone who you know kinda well (you've at least had face-to-face rapport) a bit overkill. It's just coffee, not a dinner date. Why not ask her in person, just casual y'know?slitherjef said:Yeah. Real nice help there, Bvbidd
Attraction runs on a clock.
She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.
The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."
One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.
Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.
Actualy it does make sense.Francisco d'Anconia said:I just had a strange epiphany (alright, it was just a brain-fart) about phone calls and coffee dates, to me it seems that a phone call to someone who you know kinda well (you've at least had face-to-face rapport) a bit overkill. It's just coffee, not a dinner date. Why not ask her in person, just casual y'know?
The telephone thing seems like it would be for making less off the cuff type plans, things a bit more weighty than just coffee. Maybe that's why it seems kinda strange to phone for something as simple as coffee. Does that make any sense?
Good point! I like that idea.The Inside Man said:Just feel the vibe, whip open the phone and roll with it.