"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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Potential Fiancee Whose Parents Are Divorced and Have New Spouses

Frank2500

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Greetings Everyone,

So my relationship with the woman I met in October last year while walking down the street has significantly evolved. The chemistry between us is great, she's a strong, Christian/God-fearing woman and our love has continued to grow. She has almost all of the physical and personality preferences that I desire in a woman and I am seriously thinking about getting engaged to her (proposing to her) at some point in the near future. However, there's something about her family that I discovered and that I'm afraid may lead to disapproval from my own side considering I was raised in a pretty conservative family:

1) Her parents have been divorced/separated for many years. She lives with her Mum and is her Mum's only child.


2) Not only are her parents divorced, but both of them have new spouses in their lives. Her Dad is married to a different woman and has about three or four children with her, while her Mum lives in their home with another man and is probably not on speaking terms with her ex-husband.


I was just wondering if any of you have been in such a complicated situation and if so, how you handled it. I'm already worried that having been raised in a strong Christian and conservative family, once these details are revealed, I would face very strong opposition from my family who would certainly disapprove of me going any further with the relationship. Yet the joy and peace this woman brings to me and the chemistry we share is something I don't want to lose. This is really the first woman I have been with with whom I share such special chemistry and a sincere love. What are you guys' thoughts?
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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Ruleit

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How old is she?
What is her relationship history?
Why did her parents split?
What kind of church does she attend?
How long did it take to s3x her up?
 

Scaramouche

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Dear Frank,
If you look at the statistics you will find that that the odds are against you,also your Lady is probably coming to the end of her Child bearing years,possibly hears that Clock ticking,so will be on her best behaviour...A good guide to a how a Woman is likely to turn out is to look at her Mother,if she has lived with her for many years,chances are that she has absorbed much of her personality...You haven't known this Lady for a year yet,why not wait and see how she Norms out?
 

Frank2500

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She turned 29 a few months ago. Well, in two months I would have dated her for a year. I haven't yet gotten around to asking her why her parents separated because I didn't think she would feel comfortable telling me so soon. In terms of the church she goes to, she goes to a Pentecostal church (she's a born-again Christian and very dedicated to serving in church and prays a lot). I also haven't asked about her relationship history because the past is the past.

I'm in a complicated situation because I may have just 9 months left here I am and may be moving to North America after that...my contractual job opportunity in this Central African nation almost coming to an end. In that respect if I hope to get married to her I would have to make some sort of commitment.
 

Scaramouche

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Dear Frank,
Forget about the whole thing...If after a year you can't talk about relationships,hers or her parents,then how can you consider Marriage...Living in a Remote Land has twisted your values...I lived in New Guinea for a while,so I know how one will claw onto what is available...The Pentecostals are a Weird Crew believe me,there is a Spirit World out there and in their Glossalian Sessions they are in touch with it...The congregation,Elders and Ministers will always have power over this Girl...Get out Frank!
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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Frank2500

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Re:

Well, in my personal opinion I don't think it's reasonable to dump a woman just because her parents separated several years ago and now live with new spouses. My relationship is with her, not with her parents and as long as she hasn't done anything wrong and is of good character, I don't think that should be a problem.
 

Scaramouche

Master Don Juan
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Dear Frank,
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
If you knew this before,why bother posting?.....You have made up your mind,plenty of time to consider and regret later!
 
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