Post your funniest ******** translation

[DEKKA]

Originally posted by iqqi
ahhaahahah! yup, took that personally!

BTW, you sound JUST like my pyscho ex.

are you also sleeping with a woman who is 20 years older than you and who pays for that appalling bachelor pad?

hey.... whats wrong with that?

 

[iqqi]

Originally posted by DEKKA
hey.... whats wrong with that?

should've edited that. should say:

"are you also sleeping with a woman who is 20 years older than you BECAUSE she pays for that appalling bachelor pad?"

there is nothing wrong with it...if you are immoral, insecure, and strung out on drugs so you can't afford your own rent anyways and as long as you don't mind having to pass up on something real that money can't buy because you are already bought and paid for by somebody who probaly graduated with my momma! biotch! and i can't believe i let you shake my momma's hand, no wonder you liked her, but none of my friends, you gotdamned gigilo!

oh.

 

[DEKKA]

id sleep with a woman 20 years older than me even if rent wasn't an issue. i really dont have to much standards as long as she's fvckable.

 

[OpenMind]

Hey dont bust on Dekka.. he has the balls to admit his mistakes.. I give the man credit!

How about this: "Openmind you are the smartest and nicest guy I have ever met and you turn me on, but there is just something missing and I don't know what it is so don't take it personally."

Translation.. you are one smart fvck, but when it comes to women you dont have a fvcking clue and im going back to my ex-boyfriend who has an IQ of 65 but knows how to turn me on more than you do and rarely ever gives me what I want!"

I heard that a couples times a long time ago before I learned.. I put an end to that shyt

 

[MVPlaya]

I had this PU convo with this HB8, 23 years old on Friday

somewhere during the convo she says,

HB: You're too young.
MVP: Too young... that just means flirt with me some more.
HB: Wow, you DO know women, don't ya?

got her #, think I'll call her around Tuesday.

So:
"You're too young" = "Flirt with me some more, you're hot and you make me feel energetic." Keep tone of voice into account tho.

 

[seloifter]

"you're so great and any girl would be lucky to have you" = "as long as it's not me"

"I don't like him anymore" = "Although I still fantasize about jumping him in the sack every night, I'll still let you feed my need for attention"

"I'm so fat" = "I don't work out, I eat whatever the hell I want, but I still need you to tend to my delicate ego"

"I hate men" = "I just got dumped.... bad. Man I need a good fvck"

"we're moving too fast" = "just because I've given head to guys I didn't know on a dare doesn't mean I'm going to let you have this without a 100$ minimum spending"

"oh my god you're so perverted" = "don't stop, you're making me hot. I just dont' want to look like a slut"

"I've only had sex with two guys before" = "and 13 others, but they don't count because I didn't know their names."

"why can't I find a nice guy like you" = "maybe if I stopped oogling the guys who either never notice me or are physical abusers, I might. Oooh that guy's sexy."

"let me tell you what women want in a man" = "let me tell you the kind of man I would personally like to lick my boots without my ever having any feelings for him."

"I am soooo drunk!" = "I want you to fvck me right now. Although I've actually been holding this half-empty bottle of beer for the past 3 hours, tomorrow I can still claim it was alcohol's fault I'm such a *****"

alright I'm tired now

 

[OpenMind]

"i've never had a one night stand"

TRANSLATION: the guy im with right now who you think is my boyfriend is just my ONS turned fvck buddy while i wait for prince charming to come along, so don't get discouraged that i am dating you and go back to his house every night

 

[penkitten]

here is some more:http://www.anonymomma.com/femspeak.htm

 

[OpenMind]

"Go to hell!"

Translation: Go to Hell!


i hate when they say this shyt! where did i go wrong?

 

[bp1974]

"Sorry I couldn't make it last night, let's meet next Thursday, say, 7pm?" = "You will never see me again."

"I'd forgotten how good sex could be. You've re-awakened me." = "And now I'm going back to my boyfriend so he can reap the benefits of the sex monster you've turned me into."

I've had that last one twice now. Maybe I should hit on single women for a change.

 

[JohnJones]

Originally posted by seloifter


"I've only had sex with two guys before" = "and 13 others, but they don't count because I didn't know their names."

I got this one from a girl who forgot she'd told me already that she'd had 5. Translated it meant:

"I've only intentionally slept with 2 guys, the other three back-room poundings don't count because of the vodka involved."

 

[Ser_i]

Girl after cheating with you on her boyfriend feels guilty about it and talks less and less with you untill she gets trouble with her boyfriend and she asks you


"did you have a crush on me back in the beginning?" - PLEASE MAKE ME FEEL WANTED AGAIN! I NEED SOMEONE TO MENTALLY ABUSE!!

 

[Dee-Zy]

there's sum great stuff here, thx guys

keep em comin

 

[LikRetsam]

Originally posted by seloifter


"I've only had sex with two guys before" = "and 13 others, but they don't count because I didn't know their names."
[/B]

ROTFLMFAO

 

[Dee-Zy]

^^^