I was really shy around girls I liked in high school. I'm now in college and have become much more social than I used to be, but I was wondering when I'm back home do I have any chance at all with girls who knew me from high school as the shy kid? Or is it unchangeable?
Why "Whatever You Want" Keeps You Single
She says the movie looks dumb; you suddenly agree. She tests you with a little attitude; you apologize for nothing.
You think you're being easy to get along with. She reads something else entirely: a man with no edges. Nothing to hold on to. No friction, no tension, no reason to wonder what he really thinks.
The "22 Rules" taught me to push back — playfully, calmly, without needing her approval. Strange things happened after that.
Post-shyness
- Thread starter Energy25
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“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”
Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.
Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers. Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.
I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.
zekko
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You're not locked into your role from high school. People change. I'm sure you know some girls in high school who were considered ugly then a few years later wham they blossomed into some nice looking women. Similarly, the shy guy from high school can be the cool guy from college. The popular jocks from high school can end up working for the nerdy guy they used to pick on. Situations change.
By the way, I was shy in my teens, but I was extremely social throughout my 20s. I think most people in their 20s are very social, they are testing their wings a bit I suppose. I'm not shy any more, but I am a natural introvert and I find I no longer enjoy the crowds and the constant hanging out with people like I did when I was younger. It's too bad in a way, but it happens to a lot of people when they get older. I don't want to spend all my time socializing when I don't want to, just so I can impress a few women.
By the way, I was shy in my teens, but I was extremely social throughout my 20s. I think most people in their 20s are very social, they are testing their wings a bit I suppose. I'm not shy any more, but I am a natural introvert and I find I no longer enjoy the crowds and the constant hanging out with people like I did when I was younger. It's too bad in a way, but it happens to a lot of people when they get older. I don't want to spend all my time socializing when I don't want to, just so I can impress a few women.
I was a massive nerd in high school/elementary school, and all the girls knew it. But disappear for a few years to college, learn some skills, and it can be a remarkable change.
I ran into a girl from elementary school a couple of months ago at a bar. She'd become ridiculously attractive since then, and I walked over to her at a bar and struck up a conversation. She couldn't believe how much I'd changed, and told me a few times during the night that she felt sorry for not getting to know me better back then. She ended up coming back to my place that night...
Don't focus on "will they like me?". Go home, have some fun, and they should see you in a different light. Don't make trying to close them your primary goal of being home, as it comes off as being needy (with this girl, I stopped to talk for maybe a minute, worked the room for a while, got some phone numbers, then she came and bought me a drink and wanted to catch up on old times).
I ran into a girl from elementary school a couple of months ago at a bar. She'd become ridiculously attractive since then, and I walked over to her at a bar and struck up a conversation. She couldn't believe how much I'd changed, and told me a few times during the night that she felt sorry for not getting to know me better back then. She ended up coming back to my place that night...
Don't focus on "will they like me?". Go home, have some fun, and they should see you in a different light. Don't make trying to close them your primary goal of being home, as it comes off as being needy (with this girl, I stopped to talk for maybe a minute, worked the room for a while, got some phone numbers, then she came and bought me a drink and wanted to catch up on old times).