"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

Read more...

Possible to reignite attraction after it was strong but than you wimped out?

Learning

Don Juan
Joined
Apr 18, 2008
Messages
10
Reaction score
0
Hi

I was just wondering if you once had super strong unbelievable attraction with a woman but than destroyed that attraction through super needy, insecure, desperate wimpy antics -- Is it possible to build that attraction back? Is there any difference if she is or isn't in a new relationship? Do you have to wait a certain amount of timeThis was a long distance relationship where we never saw each other in person.

How would you go about it?
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

Read more...

tsmith2334

Master Don Juan
Joined
Sep 4, 2007
Messages
761
Reaction score
16
Location
NC
I doubt few, if any, members here will agree with me on this, but I think it is possible to rekindle attraction, even upon messing up pretty bad.

If there's an inherent, physical attraction between the two of you, more likely than not I think it is possible (though not guaranteed) that the attraction can be reignited given time.

This can usually be explained with women who continue to date their abusive, lousy, wimpy ex-boyfriends. And they usually don't even truly change or make an attempt to do so.

That's what makes it important to note that, no matter what you or she or anyone else does... you can't change a physical attraction. If she thinks you're hotter than George Clooney, she'll always feel that way... assuming you don't grow a mo-hawk and gain three-hundred pounds. The emotional attraction is what you have to work on, the physical stuff is and always will be in your favor.

The important factors here are usually time and change (while ironically partially staying the same). The girl will most likely not be attracted to you again overnight. It could take anywhere from six months to three years, in all honesty.

Furthermore, you have to have consciously made an effort change the negative aspects that would have turned her off, while maintaining the characteristics that she liked. (I.E. you're more confident and less jealous now, but still funny and considerate of her feelings... just an example).

I have noticed myself getting second and third chances with women that would have been considered a lost cause by giving it time, changing my demeanor, and coming back unaffected and as confident as ever.

In fact, in some instances I've found the girl more attracted to me than she ever was in the first place, while I've moved on to new prospects and plates.
 

Lord Shinra

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Sep 4, 2007
Messages
341
Reaction score
2
Location
NJ
I agree with you tsmith, but the situations are very, very limited in when its possible.
I can give you an example of that being an ex fb of mine that just fizzled out due to my wussy and pretty not proper antics, which 2 years later I successfully re spun. Its possible, but like was said above there has to be attraction to begin with.

If you feel it, try it, but I usually stay away from situations I feel are going back in time.
 

astrophysic

New Member
Joined
Dec 13, 2012
Messages
1
Reaction score
0
I have a question, not a reply. You seem like you may be able to answer it. I met a girl while we were staying at a hostel, and twice she came onto me very strong while drunk. I don't drink. She didn't touch me- it was all verbal. Anyway she's hot but I didn't make a move because I'm not comfortable moving on a drunk girl. Now my friends tell me she's probably lost all attraction for me. Do you suppose that's true, and if so, is it possible to reignite the attraction?
 

Boilermaker

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 3, 2010
Messages
1,332
Reaction score
76
OP:

Yeah, I have done that more than a few times, and let me tell you,

these things are very "organic"

there's no such thing as taking attraction and snapping it in a second.

Of course, there's a point where you go to "plastic deformation"

where there's no point of return,

but if you "DJ" up at the right time,

even after you acted needy initially, you can take a lot of it back.
 

“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”

Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.

Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers.  Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.

I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.

Read more...

TillTheEndOfTime

Master Don Juan
Joined
Dec 4, 2004
Messages
1,930
Reaction score
59
Attraction is mainly a physical force. As long as you don't CREEP a girl out, there is always a chance of getting back in the picture.

On the other hand, no amount of technique can EVER overcome a lack of physical attraction. Ever.
 
Top