That is something I hadn't considered. After reading Rollo's books and other resources, I felt I had it at least somewhat figured out. I was able to diffuse arguments I was never able to in the past and felt I finally had the upper hand. But you're right. It's may be a false sense of confidence that will hurt me in the end.You have seen through her game and she knows it. It doesn't give you the edge you think. It would if she needed to hold your frame and she is still holding it only because of the child and money issue. But she won't do it forever and this is what you and every guy that didn't have LTR with BPD in the final stage before don't understand:
Once the game is rigged against BPD women (due to her mistakes and her true persona being visible to her partner) she will NEVER accept male victory because for her the sheer fact that you are fighting and you are threating her is the sign that you're not her submissive and ultimately castrated prince on the white hourse anymore and it triggers her emergency mode, gathering resources behind your back and preparing for war and/or leaving you. Because she will never allow you to maintain upper hand. It's revolting idea for her really.
She will leave you when the opportunity will arise and your advantage will end if you won't procede with the divorce - first other guy in her radar, beta male that will accept her for what she will present him to be, will give her ability to monkey-branch from you. BPD women don't hold any emotions other than contepmt for men that don't treat them 'good' in their understanding of that word.
I'm fairly certain she has been hiding money (so have I). She get's aggressive and is still 'prepping' for the divorce.
She has plenty of "orbiters" ready to move her in and marry her at the drop of the hat. But she tells me it's a turn off for them to be so forward. Which is understandable. We will see what happens.
I've been able to recognize that lately. Claiming I needed medication for my depression (I saw a doctor, they said medication could help, but wasn't' necessary, as I didn't have suicidal thoughts). Claiming that the police put down in their report that I was "mentally unstable" the night I had her arrested for domestic violence (which doesn't make any sense, I was calm and just talked to the sheriff). She complains to my family and her friends, making it out that I'm clearly the bad guy.It will be always "your fault" and she's making you to see like you're the crazy ones... It called gaslighting.. Such as to the extent from these PD person can go.
I strongly suggest you seeing your theraphist alone afterwards to avoid future difficulties.
I will talk to my lawyer and see what they can do. The house is in her parents name, and I'm already off the lease. I don't have a stable place for my daughter at the moment. I own my own business, but it isn't that lucrative. I stayed there temporarily when she initially kicked me out of the house. That's my major hurdle at the moment, securing a place. I live in southern california, so living arrangements aren't cheap. My family is out of state and not much of an option.Get away from her and take your daughter with you. Don't let your daughter grow up with a narcissist. Force a personality diagnosis of her through so you can use evidence of her narcissism and the negative effect it'd have for your daughter as a battering ram to get custody and a good settlement.