"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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(Possible BPD? Bored Addict?) What is Going on!?

TheRiddle

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I met Tonya 2 in a half months ago. We lived in different cities and went on our last date 2 weeks ago. Her parents are super religious which really through me off and made me act nicer then usual. Red flags began to pop up though , as I knew the friends she choose and ex were into drugs.(I stay away from this myself because I've had problems in the past) I gave her the benefit of the doubt though and she always claimed she wasn't into that stuff but would constantly make jokes alluding to it...

We got along fantastic on our dates and kept in constant contact through email,skype, phonecalls etc. Our contact was a bit strange though, as at times I would receive incoherent calls and texts and when she lost her temper she would change from being an angel to a complete B%$#. Usually I would just not even answer her calls and if I did and noticed she was acting this way I would end it early. She would then always bring up stories about guys hitting on her or hanging out with ex's which I would brush off and made her attempt to talk about them even more...

Our last date... It was her birthday so we both drove halfway to meet each other... We made out had fun, and went back to her hotel were I had wine set up. She basically all but said we were gonna have sex(throughout the whole week as well) but stops me at the last possible minute. Saying first that she's used to doing this while on something and then just saying it was a joke when I confronted her. I may have beena bit clingy and desperate(paying for lunch,dinner) but I'm sure there's more to this. Throughout the whole thing it seems like she would act like an angel at times and a psychopath at others.

Tonya said she didn't feel enough sparks from the beginning we met, yet still was down my pants. We both left and I got a text from Tonya thanking me for her birthday card and and saying that she knew I would make some girl lucky some day and that she thought we should keep in contact and to call her whenever I wanted. I of course didn't respond and removed any contact from her(facebook,phone etc) I've dated plenty of girls but just couldn't read this. My guy friends said they thought that this was more then just me paying for lunch and dinner and acting nice since it was her birthday and suggested she was just an addict by her she usually dates guys with a different background comment.

At this point I'm just wondering what the %$# happened?and if I made any mistakes. Am I dealing with a BPD? A crazy addict bored that I'm no longer in that lifestyle? If so I'm glad this turned out this way but am I wrong what happened?
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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TheRiddle

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After thinking about it for a while, I think I answered my own question. What started out as someone who "really didn't like to drink" was hanging out with druggies. Someone who had originally only dated "2 guys" Yet later admitted to making out with lots of guys in clubs. The constant fake tears, the lies, this one was at the least an addict and liar and most likely a psycho but the distance helped her hide it.

Wish I had noticed earlier but so glad to be away from something which could have ended so toxic.
 

Acq

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I used to be on weed and developed BPD traits too, most people who are on weed (heavily) have these traits, especially when not high.

a wolf in sheeps clothing is a common thing among girls these days anyway.

there is more fish in the sea, move on.
 

Semtex

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BPD's are for sex (at best), not relationship material.
 

Kailex

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Remove the word "religious" from your first post and it would have been incredibly easy to see those red flags even easier.

What clouded your mind were her "beliefs" but as you could clearly see, her actions weren't congruent with anything she was telling you.

Look, if you've been going out with someone for 2 months and you have to make a thread asking if they are possibly BPD and then mention about 3 red flags in a matter of minutes... then it's probably time you put them on the backburner and spin better plates.

These women aren't LTR material, and barely FB material.
 

"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"

You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.

She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.

Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.

Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.

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