Here's the situation: I'm 25, a college graduate (and currently an MBA student) with a full-time job and legitimate career with a solid salary, my own place, and have a good group of friends. In other words, my career path is right on track. I feel that I'm very good with people in general. However, I haven't been with a girl since college, and despite what I consider extremely good social behavior, haven't hooked up with a lady in almost three years. Obviously, I'm doing something wrong, which is why I am here looking for help.
I've read the DJ Bible, and have incorporated a lot of what I've read into my daily behavior. I feel as though I am confident and have good self-esteeem. However, I'll give you a brief "field report" of what happened tonight, which I feel is typical of my weekly weekend:
A group of ~4-5 of us go to a (trendy) bar, grab a table and get drinks. Chill. I see a lady I fancy, I approach and say hi, she seems cool. I initiate minor kino (touching her shoulder, hip, etc.) and she reciprocates. I feel as though things are going well. After a few minutes, some song comes on that she wants to dance. I hate dancing. After I won't follow her to the dance floor, she dances in place. I leave back to my table of friends. I approach her again ~10 minutes later, and when another song comes on and I won't go to the dance floor, she dances in place. I play along (I'm a little more tipsy at the point), but again, am horrible at dancing, and it's pretty obvious. I get called the fool so go back to my friends.
Later in the night (near bar close), I'll make another approach and we talk some more. Some more minor kino, she seems cool, and I number close. However, this is a typical pattern that I've experienced and I'm not confident that it will lead to anything.
Based on this, I feel my issue is with my dancing. I will admit, I am horrible at it. Is this a fatal flaw? Or am I going to the wrong venues? This bar is like my Cheers; the bartenders know my name, the music is decent, and the people are good looking. However, the fact that on Friday/Saturday is it a sportsbar/danceclub really rocks my game.
So tell me, how do I fix this?
I've read the DJ Bible, and have incorporated a lot of what I've read into my daily behavior. I feel as though I am confident and have good self-esteeem. However, I'll give you a brief "field report" of what happened tonight, which I feel is typical of my weekly weekend:
A group of ~4-5 of us go to a (trendy) bar, grab a table and get drinks. Chill. I see a lady I fancy, I approach and say hi, she seems cool. I initiate minor kino (touching her shoulder, hip, etc.) and she reciprocates. I feel as though things are going well. After a few minutes, some song comes on that she wants to dance. I hate dancing. After I won't follow her to the dance floor, she dances in place. I leave back to my table of friends. I approach her again ~10 minutes later, and when another song comes on and I won't go to the dance floor, she dances in place. I play along (I'm a little more tipsy at the point), but again, am horrible at dancing, and it's pretty obvious. I get called the fool so go back to my friends.
Later in the night (near bar close), I'll make another approach and we talk some more. Some more minor kino, she seems cool, and I number close. However, this is a typical pattern that I've experienced and I'm not confident that it will lead to anything.
Based on this, I feel my issue is with my dancing. I will admit, I am horrible at it. Is this a fatal flaw? Or am I going to the wrong venues? This bar is like my Cheers; the bartenders know my name, the music is decent, and the people are good looking. However, the fact that on Friday/Saturday is it a sportsbar/danceclub really rocks my game.
So tell me, how do I fix this?
