"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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Playing the Long Game, waiting longer than you'd like to ask a girl out

Building_and_Loan

Senior Don Juan
Joined
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This past September I joined a local business-development networking group to help further my career and get out and meet new people, and I also wanted to just have something more to do with my free time.

There are 8 of us in this group, and coincidentally they are all girls except for me. There's a girl in the group who has shown mild interest now and then such as a really friendly "hey Building_and_Loan, how are you?" to me even though there are others there too, sitting closer to my side of the table at networking events, talking to me, and talking about how she doesn't have a significant other (not directly to me, but when she knew I was around and could hear her).

The problem is that joining this professional business group was/is important to me so I didn't want to jeopardize it by being the new guy and immediately asking out the hottest girl in the group, I decided against being "that guy" and just used the group as a way to plan networking events and such. Plus it gave me a chance to get to know her and see that we have things in common.

Well now I want to date her lol, but I'm starting to think, have I waited too long to ask her out? Normally I would never wait this long, but in my opinion, time isn't more important than the amount of instances I've actually seen her. She's the one who interviewed me for my acceptance into this professional group, so including that face to face meeting, I think I've seen her no more than 7-8 times since September, and our one-on-one time is extremely limited since it's always a group setting. I see this group about every 3 weeks or so. At least two of those meetings were during our group meetings early in the morning too, so there was no good time to ask her out because we all dash out of there to head to work right after, and we can only talk strictly business since we're pressed for time.

I definitely know that I'm not in any type of "friend zone" as we're not friends on Facebook, I don't have her number, and I think I still have that level of mystery to her. My only concern is that she now thinks I'm not interested in her because I haven't asked her out yet, so she decided to emotionally move on, but I could be overthinking that too.

Thoughts? I need some objective analysis, thanks in advance.
 
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"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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Building_and_Loan

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Dec 25, 2014
Messages
413
Reaction score
247
Yep good call, that's what I was thinking and worried about too but I'm good.

Thanks for reassuring me haha. I'll definitely have to escalate sexually on the date too with some kino and all. I need her to think of me as a sexual being.
 
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