Personality > Looks?

[European-DJ]

I am wondering if anyone else, who has spent a considerable amount of time on the dating scene, has encountered a similar change in their mindset.

As time progresses, I am becoming more attracted to personality than looks; when I joined this site (18 years old) I only cared about looks. I remember how I would (in my mind) be head-over-heels for the 9's, while I couldn't care less about the 6's and 7's that I had sex with. However, over time, I notice that I have become indifferent when a hot girl gets cold, whereas the average girl (with a good personality obv.) will make my mind tangle up.

Now, I know that I will be flamed on this forum for what I am about to write, but I am wondering if this is because I am approaching a time in my life (25 years old) where my mind is subconsciously thinking about settling in a stable monogamous relationship with a girl of "average looks" (that turns me on/is good in bed) and a great personality? In doing so, I would get a girl that stimulates me both mentally and physically but without having to deal with the hassle associated with committing to a 9?

I am curious about your thoughts on this matter!

/European

 

[sosousage]

well you arent female. they care about your look and how much they will laugh at your jokes and talk with you will depent how good looking you are.

 

[ohrein]

Show me an attractive woman and I'll show you a guy who's tired of ****ing her. Once you get close to 30, you start to want depth in your life. You want to improve as a person and you want to surround yourself with people who make your life better. At the end of the day, a woman who can do that is far more rare than some hot girl and it's unlikely you'll meet many people, let alone women, who can do that for you. On top of that, I think the 9's and 10's of the world struggle to find and understand that depth to life because of the way they're treated. There are exceptions, of course, but you're much more likely to find a down to earth quality single woman in the average range than the uppers. A 9 or 10 who is that quality is never going to be single for very long and you're gonna have to be an exceptional guy to get one.

Anyway, I think you're just maturing. It happens to most guys as we hit 30. We want a woman, not a ***** to stick our **** into. Might be time to change your standards and strategies.

 

[Who Dares Win]

So you no longer care about 9s with bad personality but would appreciate more a 7 with a good one? fine but what if a 7 becomes a 5....are you still gonna fall for her personality?

Mate half of the men in this world would kill a small village to have a 7 with a crappy personality...let alone a 7 with a good one.

The average guy in this world is usually struggling to have average IQ 6s, talking about 7s with great personality as if they are leftovers make no sense.

I dont know in which world you live (guess either northeastern europe or scandinavia according to your talkings) but all around me I only see fat entitled girls who hardly hit a 7 in look.

 

[RangerMIke]

Well.... yea. Wait until you are 50.... You will get to the point where really all you care about is if she is attractive enough to turn you on. When you've been with enough women you realize when the lights go off they are all the same. I'm at the point now where if I go out with a chick and she puts no effort in the date, I'll never call her again. BTW, women have known this for years. Looks attract women, but it won't keep them. ALL Chicks lose interest FAST in a man even if he is good looking with the personality of a DISH cloth.

 

[sosousage]

Well.... yea. Wait until you are 50.... You will get to the point where really all you care about is if she is attractive enough to turn you on. When you've been with enough women you realize when the lights go off they are all the same. I'm at the point now where if I go out with a chick and she puts no effort in the date, I'll never call her again. BTW, women have known this for years. Looks attract women, but it won't keep them. ALL Chicks lose interest FAST in a man even if he is good looking with the personality of a disk cloth.

what personality would you describe as disk cloth

 

[RangerMIke]

what personality would you describe as disk cloth

Sorry I am a victim of auto-correct. DISH cloth is what I intended to type. The metaphor "DISH cloth" personality is single purpose, one dimensional, something that you don't think about until you need to dry a dish, or mop up a spill in the kitchen. Nothing really important which is disposable.

 

[ohrein]

So you no longer care about 9s with bad personality but would appreciate more a 7 with a good one? fine but what if a 7 becomes a 5....are you still gonna fall for her personality?

Mate half of the men in this world would kill a small village to have a 7 with a crappy personality...let alone a 7 with a good one.

The average guy in this world is usually struggling to have average IQ 6s, talking about 7s with great personality as if they are leftovers make no sense.

I dont know in which world you live (guess either northeastern europe or scandinavia according to your talkings) but all around me I only see fat entitled girls who hardly hit a 7 in look.

I'd probably stick with the 5 to be honest. I think most guys who put in the work can get a 6/7 with a great personality if they put in the work and time. The only above average trait I have is height. I'm not buff, I'm not handsome and I dress very averagely. Personality goes a long way with QUALITY women.

 

[marmel75]

I am wondering if anyone else, who has spent a considerable amount of time on the dating scene, has encountered a similar change in their mindset.

As time progresses, I am becoming more attracted to personality than looks; when I joined this site (18 years old) I only cared about looks. I remember how I would (in my mind) be head-over-heels for the 9's, while I couldn't care less about the 6's and 7's that I had sex with. However, over time, I notice that I have become indifferent when a hot girl gets cold, whereas the average girl (with a good personality obv.) will make my mind tangle up.

Now, I know that I will be flamed on this forum for what I am about to write, but I am wondering if this is because I am approaching a time in my life (25 years old) where my mind is subconsciously thinking about settling in a stable monogamous relationship with a girl of "average looks" (that turns me on/is good in bed) and a great personality? In doing so, I would get a girl that stimulates me both mentally and physically but without having to deal with the hassle associated with committing to a 9?

I am curious about your thoughts on this matter!

/European

The longer a women knows you the more personality comes into play. At first its mostly looks based.

 

[Glassguy]

As you get older, your standards should not decline but actually increase. The more women you date/sleep with, the more you will realize that you will have attraction to other things......personality, wit, intelligence........how woman kisses, the list is endless.

You will use that initial attraction to her looks as interests and start digging deeper. Or at least you should.

Throw me a HB9 without a fun, outgoing personality and the ability to have an intellectual conversation while on a date and I will show you a pump and dump. My attraction to other things besides physical looks are just as important, but it still all starts from how they look for me at this point, with there being an equal attraction to other attributes I look for in a woman.

 

[BeExcellent]

Show me an attractive woman and I'll show you a guy who's tired of ****ing her. Once you get close to 30, you start to want depth in your life. You want to improve as a person and you want to surround yourself with people who make your life better. At the end of the day, a woman who can do that is far more rare than some hot girl and it's unlikely you'll meet many people, let alone women, who can do that for you. On top of that, I think the 9's and 10's of the world struggle to find and understand that depth to life because of the way they're treated. There are exceptions, of course, but you're much more likely to find a down to earth quality single woman in the average range than the uppers. A 9 or 10 who is that quality is never going to be single for very long and you're gonna have to be an exceptional guy to get one.

This ^^^^ is true. All of it. Pretty/hot/beautiful is much easier to find if you are not concomitantly screening for emotional stability. Once a man has experienced enough hot crazy women, he gets over *just* looks and becomes much more selective, at least as far as entertaining a woman for a relationship.

well you arent female. they care about your look and how much they will laugh at your jokes and talk with you will depent how good looking you are.

I am female. The above statement is only true to a point. Looks are a single factor, but nowhere near the whole enchilada. Women tend to filter on more than just looks and for some women in the hotter subset, looks only get you in the door...beyond that you gotta have more than going for you.

Some of this is going to be age/wisdom/life experience related. It's noteworthy that the older posters put less premium on looks alone and more of a premium on the total package.

 

[sosousage]

This ^^^^ is true. All of it. Pretty/hot/beautiful is much easier to find if you are not concomitantly screening for emotional stability. Once a man has experienced enough hot crazy women, he gets over *just* looks and becomes much more selective, at least as far as entertaining a woman for a relationship.



I am female. The above statement is only true to a point. Looks are a single factor, but nowhere near the whole enchilada. Women tend to filter on more than just looks and for some women in the hotter subset, looks only get you in the door...beyond that you gotta have more than going for you.

Some of this is going to be age/wisdom/life experience related. It's noteworthy that the older posters put less premium on looks alone and more of a premium on the total package.

but in a case where you talk with attractive person and with an ugly one then you will probably put more in conversation and flirting in first case, while trying to avoid all sort of flirt from second if not consider it creepy

 

[Augustus_McCrae]

I am wondering if anyone else, who has spent a considerable amount of time on the dating scene, has encountered a similar change in their mindset.

As time progresses, I am becoming more attracted to personality than looks; when I joined this site (18 years old) I only cared about looks. I remember how I would (in my mind) be head-over-heels for the 9's, while I couldn't care less about the 6's and 7's that I had sex with. However, over time, I notice that I have become indifferent when a hot girl gets cold, whereas the average girl (with a good personality obv.) will make my mind tangle up.

Now, I know that I will be flamed on this forum for what I am about to write, but I am wondering if this is because I am approaching a time in my life (25 years old) where my mind is subconsciously thinking about settling in a stable monogamous relationship with a girl of "average looks" (that turns me on/is good in bed) and a great personality? In doing so, I would get a girl that stimulates me both mentally and physically but without having to deal with the hassle associated with committing to a 9?

I am curious about your thoughts on this matter!

/European

Undeniable Scientific evidence backing the findings of your “in the field” empirical evidence pointing you toward the 6 and 7’s:

-Augustus-

 

[BeExcellent]

You only say that because you're not hot.

Neither are you intelligent.

Don't respond.

Oh that's funny. My results in life & love indicate otherwise, lol.

 

[Glassguy]

You only say that because you're not hot.

Neither are you intelligent.

Don't respond.

More personal attacks that go unnoticed from good ole Richard the toad. Mods????

And Richard- I would classify BeExcellent as someone who knows more about "total game" and "relationships" in her little finger as a woman than your brain will ever be able to comprehend as a man (or better said as a lack thereof).

 

[RichardTheFrog]

More personal attacks that go unnoticed from good ole Richard the toad. Mods????

And Richard- I would classify BeExcellent as someone who knows more about "total game" and "relationships" in her little finger as a woman than your brain will ever be able to comprehend as a man (or better said as a lack thereof).

Cause real men play baseball.

I'll bet she does know how to PLAY GAMES. No argument there.

By the way, "total game" isn't even a thing. I love how people on these sites quote things that aren't even real words.

 

[RichardTheFrog]

Oh that's funny. My results in life & love indicate otherwise, lol.

Didn't you spend your life supporting some loser?

Hahaha

 

[BeExcellent]

It's interesting really because when you become a student of "game" really you are simply a student of human interactions. Human interaction is endlessly fascinating and there are ways to tilt the board to one's advantage, hence all the focus on self-improvement/being your best self independent of women. It's best not to take oneself too seriously either (kill the ego - the ego does not serve you well in the long run).

That's why self development is so critical to having solid inner game. If you are absolutely rock solid about who you are and what you have to offer, you are going to exude a sort of confidence that is self-evident to others and people will be both fascinated by and drawn to you. You won't care if somebody doesn't think you are 100% awesome (and not everybody will, no matter who you are)...yet if you have such a grounded sense of self people will sense your self assurance, and that allows other people to relax and exist in your presence, because you are relaxed in your own skin.

And people who share this quality recognize each other. Water seeks its own level.

 

[DEEZEDBRAH]

I am wondering if anyone else, who has spent a considerable amount of time on the dating scene, has encountered a similar change in their mindset.

As time progresses, I am becoming more attracted to personality than looks; when I joined this site (18 years old) I only cared about looks. I remember how I would (in my mind) be head-over-heels for the 9's, while I couldn't care less about the 6's and 7's that I had sex with. However, over time, I notice that I have become indifferent when a hot girl gets cold, whereas the average girl (with a good personality obv.) will make my mind tangle up.

Now, I know that I will be flamed on this forum for what I am about to write, but I am wondering if this is because I am approaching a time in my life (25 years old) where my mind is subconsciously thinking about settling in a stable monogamous relationship with a girl of "average looks" (that turns me on/is good in bed) and a great personality? In doing so, I would get a girl that stimulates me both mentally and physically but without having to deal with the hassle associated with committing to a 9?

I am curious about your thoughts on this matter!

/European

I've been doing pickup for the past 7yrs in between LTRs, flings, ONS, SNL, FWBs.

IMHO, there obv is a fair bit of truth to personality. I would choose a "free thinker," a woman who is 7.5+ yet, trad thot, independent, educated and not just in the formal sense, practices self-knowledge, explores consciousness, into tripping/dmt, reads books not smut like fifty shades diaries of a depraved fat slob, and sense of self value is not based upon sex appeal.

I caution you though. 99% of men have the same mindset of marry a 6 who has a "good personality" only to get cucked, divorced, and ruined in the kangaroo court system.

Initially, when I first started pickup, it was a screening and vetting process to find a woman to marry. After 5yrs of pickup, the thought of marriage esp in the west is laughable.

Western women can drink like their father. Cannot cook like their mother. High kill count. Prevalence of pedaling victimhood and a series of poor lifestyle choices. Heavy student loans in majors like liberal arts and women's studies. Children out of wedlock. Bastard kids. Diff men. Offers nothing of value. Attention ***** online. Entitled as ****. Doesn't lift or does so for her next tinder jump off the **** selfie.


I am curious if there is a spoiler tag function on this forum. I got banned on sherdog and several forums for lighting it up with my pulls. Its comical. Esp on other forums whereby some mod may run a pickup forum but, has never seen a vagina before.



RSDTyler is a bit of a piece of **** but, he cautions men not to get duped by a woman's looks. Furthermore, the conventional male opinion on 9s and 10s is highly off the mark. I am 30. I can swear by a handful of girls worthy of a returned phone call and date, potential LTR material after all the years. After 7 hard years of pickup in the ****ing trenches. After a solid 10yrs of body building. After banking a ton of money, buying a home, burying a series of family, and being a bad ass.

female hypergamy gives zero ****s. Women will cuck you. If you look at hollywood or any of the shows that are popular (shameless, black mirror, house of cards, Breaking bad, HIMYM, stranger things etc) cucking is being normalized. Women skiing down cawk mountain, trashing her best years, and being a slob is celebrated. WHY? Feminism cheers women off into the abyss of daddy government. Urinating from the seated position accurately portrays the majority of men.


Advice? Carl Jung. Step into your shadow. Its one thing to moralize, to virtue signal, and posture your goodness. Its another thing to be able to make it rain, to clobber, and end a life yet, choose otherwise. Its one thing to get married and follow the beaten path. Its another to get married after you've had your fun smashing hoes and slamming skanks yet choosing an alternative lifestyle. A woman wants to grow a **** these days and be the man. Most turn into the cratered SMV crazy cat lady.

No harm. No foul. New girls turning 18 everyday. Last throater I got, chick age 22.

COME @ ME BRO

 

[ImTheDoubleGreatest!]

Advice? Carl Jung. Step into your shadow.

Can you explain what you mean by this?