Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
We are actually getting married.
Attraction runs on a clock.
She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.
The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."
One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.
Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.
deadset?
Don't feel like a moron... I accept that when you joke around and are sarcastic as often as I am, sometimes people have a hard time believing you when you're being serious. Especially on the Internet.Originally posted by quest
deadset?
i feel like a complete moron now
I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.
thru so suave , then we went to yahoo messengerOriginally posted by Fatality
congrats
few questions:
did you meet through these boards?
she's in kentucky he's in Michigan, how does that work?
what makes the other the one for you?
do you BOTH have herpes?
Yes.
Right now, we do a lot of driving. It's about five hours. But I am transferring (job) to Louisville so it will work out great. We also talk online and on the phone.
I like the way she thinks and that she's able to make me laugh... she's got a good sense of humor and that's a very important thing to me. She shows a genuine compassion for people and there is nothing better than that in my mind. She has been through a lot of really tough times and she comes out on top because she's got a mental and emotional toughness that pulls her through and shows a character that you won't find almost anywhere else. She is smart but in a way where she doesn't come off as seeming superior to other people. She looks at the world different than I do and it makes me look at the world differently. And she is hot... so hot.
Yup.do you BOTH have herpes?
You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.
She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.
Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.
Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.
You're quite welcome. You have boys, right? How old are the kids and what are their sexes? I'm only asking because the issues that will come up are different based on the ages and sex of the kids. Boys tend to have a harder time with step-fathers...but the talking like I mentioned before makes a huge difference. If you have an older boy who feels like "the man of the house", you should take extra care to give him a special responsibility...something to be in charge of. A boy who feels like "the man of the house" has the most difficult time adjusting and can bring about the most stress and problems of all.
aint that the truth
its neil patrick harris
and what if everyone on the site voted that we were fools?
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
I think it's clear that I don't base any of my opinions on what people on this site may or may not agree with.
Don't take it personally...everyone who tells me they're getting married gets that response from me. Hell, my 16 year old son has a very sweet, pretty girlfriend who he's crazy about. He asked me what I would say if he came home at 18 and told me he was getting married. My response was "I'd tell you that you were a damn fool."
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.