Paying For The Babysitter On The First Date

[Robert_F]

Just wondering. You meet this gal with a couple of kids. You ask her out, (on a first date) and she says yes providing that you pay for the babysitter to watch her kids.

What would you say? Would you be willing to pick up the tab for the babysitter?

 

[Bible_Belt]

I've never had that happen. Every single mom I have dated has had someone to watch them when she needs a night free, like a grandparent, aunt, or the kid's dad, if it is his time to have the kid. It sounds like she is not that into you...unless she's a totally broke, jobless, ghetto mama type. Plus, how do you really know she has to pay for that sitter, or what she actually has to pay. She could keep that money, and you wouldn't know.

 

[Robert_F]

I've never had that happen. Every single mom I have dated has had someone to watch them when she needs a night free, like a grandparent, aunt, or the kid's dad, if it is his time to have the kid. It sounds like she is not that into you...unless she's a totally broke, jobless, ghetto mama type. Plus, how do you really know she has to pay for that sitter, or what she actually has to pay. She could keep that money, and you wouldn't know.

Good points, especially the last two sentences. This is what I thought, so when she gave me this "alternative" I told her to take a walk.

 

[marmel75]

Fvck no. Low interest or testing how desperate you are. Either situation you lose.

Tell her you don't do that but when she can get it figured out to let you know and don't contact her again.

 

[GeniuzKhrist]

Is this a serious question? Like this burned a hole in your brain so bad that you had to ask us?

 

[Yewki]

Just wondering. You meet this gal with a couple of kids. You ask her out, (on a first date) and she says yes providing that you pay for the babysitter to watch her kids.

What would you say? Would you be willing to pick up the tab for the babysitter?

Absolutely not. Don't even chip in. It's her responsibility. If she's not happy with that, you walk.

 

[Robert_F]

Is this a serious question? Like this burned a hole in your brain so bad that you had to ask us?

No, DH. I asked to see what others would say, not for pointless statements like yours.

 

[El Payaso]

Yes. Also ask her if she needs money for her rent, utilities, car note, her ex boyfriend's cell phone bill and her baby daddy's bail money.

 

[dustmuffin]

He ll No......

 

[Steeze]

Yes then I would buy her dinner and all her drinks then text revealing details about my entire life nonstop for days before posting a question on this board as to whether this chick is losing interest when she once was so eager to go out with me that time.

 

[Robert_F]

Yes. Also ask her if she needs money for her rent, utilities, car note, her ex boyfriend's cell phone bill and her baby daddy's bail money.

You forgot to ask about supporting her drug habit as well.

 

[Robert_F]

Yes then I would buy her dinner and all her drinks then text revealing details about my entire life nonstop for days before posting a question on this board as to whether this chick is losing interest when she once was so eager to go out with me that time.

OR...you could tell her when the check came for the dinner that you have enough money to either pay for the babysitter or dinner, not both!

 

[Amilz]

No, DH. I asked to see what others would say, not for pointless statements like yours.

If his statement was pointless then so was your post.

 

[Maximus Rex]

Why are you dating women with kids?

 

[Asmodeus]

I think she was just testing you to see what she could squeeze out of you. Some women are looking for men who will simply provide for them (gold diggers, women looking for sugar daddies, ect). Thus, they are not dating you but your wallet and your willingness to open it for them. She sounds like she is more into what you have to offer her in terms of finances instead of anything else.
She is not worth it anyway. Single mom with a couple kids. Likely also had a divorce and other bad history. Her value sounds rather worthless and not even worth an investment of your time, much less money.

 

[logicallefty]

"I am not in a position to pay for the sitter. Hey I know being a single parent and dating can be difficult to juggle, I have been there. Give me a call when you are in a better position to be dating."

 

[SgtSplacker]

It's the ol single mother catch 22 in effect here. If you date her she knows you have no other options and loses interest. You would think she would be grateful for your efforts if you did that, but all your kindness would only go to represent weakness to her. The only thing single mothers are good for is pump and dump, and the only reason for that is they themselves think this way. Because if they saw the value in themselves you did they would respect you for being cool. Don't waste your time on single mothers, it's just a load of BS from the get.

 

[Robert_F]

It's the ol single mother catch 22 in effect here. If you date her she knows you have no other options and loses interest. You would think she would be grateful for your efforts if you did that, but all your kindness would only go to represent weakness to her. The only thing single mothers are good for is pump and dump, and the only reason for that is they themselves think this way. Because if they saw the value in themselves you did they would respect you for being cool. Don't waste your time on single mothers, it's just a load of BS from the get.

Tell me about it. I was just taking a chance on her, but soon found she was nothing more than a searcher for financial support which wasn't going to be me.

It's sad though how many single mothers out there with b%stard offspring that want to find someone solely to support their child/children. Some have children as a hobby while other use them to milk the welfare system. Once in a while you will find one that is semi-decent, but it's rare.

 

[wifehunter]

single mom = red flag

 

[MrWood]

In Europe you pay this babysitter fee if she will stay the night... just before you close the deal,
it's 50buks and she will call her "taxi friend" to "take it to the sitter