This is a very controversial topic. As DJ's though, most of us should be leaning to the do-not-pay for her side, but I see some rebels up in here.
Put it this way:
Think of a date as an interview for the most important position in your life. You are the CEO of the company. Would you spend money on a newbie who hasn't been working in your company for a day? Are you going to PAY her more because she's good-looking? SCREW THAT.
Dating is about trial and error. Now, unless you're a psychic, you have no clue what this chick is going to be like; hence, you get to know her(which is the reason why you're out with her in the first place). She--although maybe a HOT one--is a stranger. You don't know what she has to offer you and vice versa.
The times when men did everything are over. If they claim that they are equal then us, then she better have money in her wallet or she's gonna be washing some dishes(either at the restaurant or at my place for having paid for her).
This is what I tell them(in a playful way): "We're just hanging as friends so you're paying for your own!
"
OR "I usually don't give in this easily, but since you are (insert insulting compliment here), I'll make an exception. Where are you taking me?"
OR I just go up to her for the approach and ask:
Me: Hey, are you shy or something?
hb: (answers) Why?
me: Because (enter situation you're both in) and you haven't come over to say hi or asked for my number. What's going on here--are my good looks really that intimidating?
hb: cracking up at how confident you are (reacts to your confidence and reacts receptively or rejects you).
If she your game is solid and she likes you, sweet! If she doesn't, then examine where you blew it(if you did) and find another chick. You have a lot to offer and she misses out on you anyway. That's the game in a nutshell.
What do I do on the 1st date? I split it in half OR have her pay for me. WTF, how do you do that Robyn? Well, I make the situation seem like she messed up in somewhere (playing hard to get, didn't get back to me on time, flaked and re-scheduled) and then let her know I'm a really busy guy, but that I want to see her(gotta give her a little value at a time) and then tell her you'll allow her to make it up to yo by doing (what you want her to do) in this case, buying you dinner. It has worked pretty well for me so far! I got a 9 to pay for me at subway. She did it with smile on her face and invited me over to her place next week.
The other option is telling her the following( my favorite):
me: guess what?
her: what?
me: I'm freaking psychic
her: (talks but you cut her off and say)
me: Hooold, it I'm having a moment (hold your hand against your head) I got this vision you're a big brat who didn't get spanked enough as a child.
her: (reacts positively and punches you)
me: It's getting clearer now! You attract these losers that want to "take you out" and pay for you an everything, but you know what. It all means nothing to you because they're all the same and you gotta manage your time.
her: (amazed and how you know this)
me: You owe me so YOU'RE coking for me
My favorite food is (enter food here). I'm busy all week, but I'm free Friday night. I'm excited to see how well you cook! Or you can just take me out (she will pay either way, haha).
It's hard to give an example that fits all of you guys, but hopefully you get the idea. This works for me 90% of the time. This conveys all the right things. You are talking about loser guys (which conveys you aren't one yourself); you make her feel feminine as she cooks for you. Make sure you reward her efforts by saying you liked her food and how just because she made you dinner doesn't mean she gets to take you home or anything. PM if you want more of this.
