"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Pacticing at work??

Diaforetikos

Senior Don Juan
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I keep seeing all these journals and FRs and I'm tired of missing out. I'm tired of waiting. I want to change. So I'm gonna be practicing opening people.

The thing is, since I work so much, I don't get much time to go out. And when I do get time, I can't go anywhere because I share a car with my bro. There aren't any clubs where I live. Nearsest one is 30-40 minutes away.

I really wanna get into this, so I was wondering, is practicing at work a good idea?

I work in retail in a mall so I get a variety of people. But since I'm just starting out, do I risk problems at my job, or do I go for it and say fvck it?
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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2crudedudes

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Practice on customers, not co-workers. Co-worker drama is HUGE when sh*t goes wrong. Speaking from experience here. It could cost you your job. With customers, the risk is lower because the worse that could happen is the customer doesn't come back. Not a big deal when you have a mall full of people. However, don't get too pushy with your approaches or they could complain to your manager about you.
 

TheGunslinger

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Diaforetikos said:
I really wanna get into this, so I was wondering, is practicing at work a good idea?
It depends what you're thinking of.

With customers it's fine, as long as you don't come off as a pervert - you start getting complaints for sexual harrassment and you can kiss the job goodbye, although I doubt it'll come to that. Still, I'd probably focus on building up confidence and practice spinning a good conversation out of thin air with them rather than trying to nail them. No point risking your job over some ass, right?

Co-workers? Talk to them, get to know them, get them to recommend you to their hot friends. But for the love of god, do not hit on them.

The good doctorj has put this out there already, but it's worth repeating:

Don't **** where you eat.

Say this to yourself everytime you feel like grabbing a co-worker's ass and you'll be fine.
 

Diaforetikos

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Dec 28, 2009
Messages
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Location
Northern California
Thanks guys. I appreciate you guys taking time to answer somethin small like this.

You guys seem to be saying the same thing. Luckily I only have two female coworkers. One of is my manager, and she's old. The second is a close friend and her bf is a good friend as well, so coworkers are out of the question.

I am very good with customer service and can strike up conversations with people about anything. My problem is holding the conversation without becoming boring. I'm also trying to steer away from the same old yes or no questions. Just trying to build confidence and not care what anyone says.

As far as work goes today, I'm still here. Haha. It's going good so far. Projecting my voice. Getting quiet customers to laugh. High energy and lots of fun. Since this isn't a FR thread and since nothing great stood out from today, I won't be posting any stories. I'll start a journal thread ASAP.

To Noob: No, Im in the US. And thanks for the input.
To Gunslinger: Hahaha. I love that azz part. Thanks for the heads up.
To 2crudedudes: I'm never pushy. But since I will be practicing I do need to hear that. Thanks
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

Read more...

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