You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.
She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.
Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.
Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
roflOriginally posted by Giovanni Casanova
Just so everyone knows... this is OXYTOCIN, not OXYCOTIN.
Do not give your dates hillbilly heroin.
When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.
Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.
Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.
The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.
I've known about it for approximately one year and I cannot say its knowledge has enhanced learning anything beyond emphasizing the power of kino, even in non-romantic contexts. It does, I think, put matters into a new perspective when you think about how touch affects you when someone touches you; it calms me down. I don't know what the article because it seems to have since gone down, but the peril of oxytocin is its effects wear off after about three or four years, if I remember correctly. Four years happens to be the magical number for most non-marital relationships to end and I don't think it's a coincidence.Alpine said:Does knowing this biochemistry help extend what you learn from actually touching and noting the reaction?
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.